Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Ice Queen Strikes Back

I have survived another day in the frozen wilderness also known as my classroom. It was a near thing, though. By 10:00 I had lost all sensation in my fingers and toes. By noon, I could move myself across the room through the sheer vibrations caused by my shivers. At 2:00 my body began to shut itself down in order that it might preserve heart and brain functioning. I don't recall much after that save a bright light and seeing my grammy waving at me with one of her lovely hand crocheted toilet tissue cozies. (it was the one with doll affixed to the top, thus making the roll of tissue look like a baby blue hoop skirt...stunning!)

It's going to be a long winter if someone over at central office doesn't take pity on us and turn the heat on. I am not an Icelandic Sheep, after all.

And, no. There was nary a flutter from Hot Flash Central. Where are those things when I need them?

Now I learn that Knitty has already published a pattern for a nose-warmer! C'mon! I was going to retire on that little idea. Maybe I can come up with a solar powered one. Or one that is self-picking...I'll keep working on it. I need to keep my mind active what with all the potential brain damage awaiting me in the upcoming months of arctic temperatures in my classroom.

Meanwhile, I am inspired to finish The Socks Of Immense Proportions speedily. My feet will surely need some socky love in this harsh and unforgiving environment. Despite fingers blackened by public-school-frostbite, I have pushed my way past the gussets and am ready to make a foot happen. As Persephone was hunkered down in her usual spot where she can handily hide the remote underneath her fluffy goodness, I figured she could do double duty as a sock model:

The remote is under her head...
I have the warmest TV remote control in all the world. It doesn't matter where it might be located on the couch, she will proceed to cover it with her fluff then sit back and watch the show as Mommy goes on a frantic hunt. Mommy will expend more energy looking for the remote than she would had she simply walked to the television and just changed the channel. In many ways, Mommy is very in touch with her "dude side."
I will knit like the wind and finish these things before the weekend, barring sock related tragedy. (Which is highly likely, given my track record. But I am cold and motivated so that could help me turn the corner...) Then I will begin work on another pair with a matching hat and hand warmers. I will swaddle myself in wooly goodness, waddle into school and say, "Take that, O Frigid Classroom!"
And that's when the hot flashes will return. You just know it...


Vicki in So. Cal. said...

It's a law of nature, you never have a hot flash when you could really use one.

Julie said...

The sock looks lovely atop the kitty cat. She has that look that says, "Oh, the things I have to put up with."

I vote for the nosewarmer/picker.

trek said...

A 'mote as a pillow?

Beth said...

Do you flip through the channels at lightening speed, not letting Persephone find something she likes to watch? Maybe she's protesting. :)

Anonymous said...

Can you not take the remote to school in your pocket along with Persephone? Then she could lie on your lap all day keeping you warm!

Anonymous said...

Don't worry the school will have the heat working by the first warm day in the spring right about the time your hot flashes kick into high gear. Isn't that always the way.
The sock and the kitty look great!

Sheila said...

I love the visual of you vibrating across the floor with the shivers!
The muff should definately accompany you to school. You'd probably start a trend, and with Persephone as neckware, you'd surely be styling!!
If you were to show up in Eskimo wear, the powers that be might get the hint.