Thursday, August 03, 2006


I promise to be delicate and tasteful, here. But if you happen to be one of those people whose very core of security and sense of well-being is rooted in preserving the belief that the female body does naught but fill out a pair of jeans and provide a means for holding in the spleen then this may not be the post for you.

I'll understand. I don't like to "dwell" either. But sometimes A Sheep needs to provide a framework for her behaviors.

I have been, shall we say, "off-cycle" for some time now. For a variety of reasons, (weight loss, "monkey pox" induced fever and, yes, age) I have been sans period since early June. The body is trying, God bless her. But it's just not working like the well-oiled machine that it use to be. The result has been what amounts to a perpetual "pms state" for quite some time.

To this we add a pinch of baby spiders, a liberal dash of hornets, a dram of insomnia, bake at a 110 degree heat index and we now have a Sheep that wants to eat ice cream non-stop and commit random acts of violence for no apparent reason.

It's not pretty.

I had hoped that, with the cooler temps today, I might be feeling a bit more light-hearted. (I didn't.) I was, however, optimistic enough that I pulled out the new tote I was sewing up. It really did seem like a good idea at the time. (It wasn't) Long story made short: the tote is finished save for the fact that I now must straggle out in order that I might purchase some distracting trim to cover what can best be described as "rage induced top stitching."

For those of you unfamiliar with this technique it involves forcing the fabric through the machine whilst gritting your teeth and muttering foul things. The resulting stitchery meanders around the bag haphazardly looking for all the world like it was sewn by a happy, drunken clown.

We live. We learn. We return to happier pastimes. We do this quickly.

The Muff Along project is progressing, but has been set aside due to the hand strain which results from forcing too much yarn around on too small needles. I actually really like the muff, though. I think it will be just the thing for winter playground duty:

Yarn specs. to follow in a later post. If I remember to do it, anyway...
Following the tote debacle, I decided to treat myself and put on a fresh bobbin of Finn. Remember back when I swore I was going to fill all the bobbins before I gave myself the pleasure of plying?

Nope. Can't wait. Don't care. Wanna see what it looks like plied!!!!

For tonight, the plan is to spend some time with the Boogie Vest. I'm all for an easy knit right now given my delicate emotional condition and all. In between rows, I plan on consuming mass quantities of ice cream directly from the carton.

I like to think that I'm saving a life. The world is safer with an over hormonified Sheep behind closed doors with her wool and dairy products.



trek said...

Oh, my, I would love to have in on that ice cream order. But I know better: never get between a stressed Sheep and her pint. Spoons can be lethal!

Feel better, Sheep.

Tygher Knits said...

To add to the TMI-fest, I've been enduring the same cycle-less state. It's more of a constant .. well, spotting. Though recently, my dear uterus has decided 'Oooh .. cramps .. that's what we're supposed to do!' and I've been eating midol like candy. So I feel your pain .. perhaps literally even!

I am jealous, however, of your spinning. Insanely so. I want to get hubby and I a wheel, because I do not think I would have the patience at -all- for spindle spinning.

Sheila said...

That is why I don't sew..all of my stitching looks like happy drunken clown work!
Very funny post tonight, Sheep (despite the uterine references).

Veggies,Yarns & Tails said...

Wow....chalk it up to a bad day/week/month Sheep, I really hope things start to upswing for you....Take it easy on those fingers while rage-stitching, you don't need another complication, I can tell.

When all else fails, breath deeply (yoga helps) , take a nap, this too shall pass.

Huggs, G

laurie in maine said...

lol...Top Stitching should never be attempted in fits of rage or even fear. I think the machine (like a dog) senses your mood and WILL spite you for it. Thread breakage is a typical sign the machine has it out for you. While top stitching (which you would generally like to look nice) thread breaks every 3 inches. WALK AWAY!

Kate said...

Okay, this is always my reaction, being a Graves girl and all, but have you had your thyroid tested? This sounds just like me last summer before I was diagnosed. Rationally you know you are being an absolute witch with a b and want to throw things but you cannot help yourself or get in a better mood. You lose weight for no apparent reason and your cycle is way the hell off. I'd have the simple blood test for hyperthyroidism if I were you.