Sunday, August 27, 2006

Love Hurts

A Letter To The Super Nice Folks At Renfro Foods:

Dear Super Nice Folks,

It is with delight that I discover your having seen fit to ship your fine products all the way from Texas up to the great state of Maine. I am particularly taken with your Raspberry Chipotle Salsa. Such a culinary masterpiece! I commend you on your ability to combine the sweet with the spicy in such a way as to give my bitter old heart such a glow.

I wonder, though, if perhaps you should consider a warning label of some sort. If, perchance, a middle aged woman with a digestive tract of the same vintage should decide to consume half a jar of this nectar at 11:00 pm it might behoove her to be aware of the consequences. It may also be worth mentioning that individuals raised in the northeast part of the country on bland chowders and lobster may not be ready for what the rest of the country considers "medium" salsa.

It would be helpful for said middle aged woman to know that, upon awakening, it is possible that her stomach will be distended in a manner reminiscent of the third trimester. This side effect is not due to divine intervention nor is it the result of alien abduction during the course of the night. Cold calls to locals priests, the FBI and GhostBusters at five in the morning are neither appreciated nor warranted.

These are really just guidelines and suggestions. I'm sure that you'll want the boys down in legal to flesh out the language a bit. All in all, though, I feel that I have covered the salient points.

In closing, let me again say how much I enjoy your fine products. I am hopeful that you will see fit to send another shipment to my local grocery posthaste!

I'm running low on the salsa.

Sincerely,

Sheepish Annie



(And you thought it couldn't get any worse than two days of underwear posts.)

Despite last nights salsa fiesta, I was up and out the door bright and early in order that I might make the world a better place by burning data onto CDs for my technology-challenged boss. The burning was accomplished quickly and some time was spent fiddling with the best way to create a client database that she can comfortably access without needing to call me twenty times per day. (my boss is actually someone I consider a friend and is really a sweetheart. I'm honestly willing to move mountains for her if humanly possible)

I made it home before the noon hour and was able to get in a bit more time on the Penance Sock then finish spinning the Finn singles. Plying is occurring as you read this. As Blogger is my witness, I will finish this before the opening day of school!

Speaking of Blogger, we seem to be having a few technical difficulties. Yesterday was not a great day for commenting on posts and today they don't seem to be forwarding to my email. I generally don't fuss too much given that its a free service 'n all. And it actually works pretty well most of the time. It sounds like many others are suffering with Blogger Malaise right now...hopefully all will return to normal soon!

Tomorrow, though, I won't be able to stare at my computer screen and obsessively check for comments. I'll be heading into school to get the classroom set up and begin reviewing files and the like. With any luck, I can move quickly and not have to spend the full week at school. This is the last gasp of summer break, 'tis sad to say. I'd like to get in just a couple more minutes of vacation-y goodness.

And celebrate it with chips 'n salsa!

SA

8 comments:

Sheila said...

You're too funny, Annie.
Have fun setting up your new classroom!

mrichme said...

How about looking for a "mild" version? Hannaford makes a nice raspberry lime salsa for you to try. It is nice to hear that you've expanded the menu options from the frozen pizza.

Good luck in your set up for school.

sheep#100 said...

Lobstah and chowdah aren't anything at all like salsa, no siree, bob!

Anonymous said...

I'm going to have to look for that salsa. It's sounds delicious! I'll just have to remember to not eat half a jar at once (which I would do). Thanks for the tip!

Good luck getting your room set up! I hope you get a bit more vacation in.

Anonymous said...

The sheep should give up salsa and stay with some sweet timothy.

This Weary Traveler said...

I hear ya sister. I take Zantac like tic tacs these days. The 40 something stomach is a big wimp. Plus being raised on Irish cooking (overcook some meat and serve with potatoes) doesn't prepare your stomach properly for life.

Anonymous said...

Yikes....your salsa sorrows sound scary.....hope your tummy and all attached pipes have returned to normal.

You could write about anything Sheep, it would still be funny. Long live panty and salsa posts LOL.

Huggs, G

Tania A said...

*hugs* Salsa can be evil .. it's all in how it's made too. Sometimes medium and I get along fine, but usually, it's mild for me, while hubby dearest likes it hot-hot-hot!