I Live To Serve.

First, let me say that my Jaywalkers have come around to my way of thinking and are moving along. The issues that seemed to keep occurring on needle #3 have been beaten into submission and I had hoped to move forward with great speed and success!

Yay me!!!!

Oh, no...wait. Change of plans. I have been given new marching orders and must set my socks aside in order that I might meet the needs of Amy, my scary but oddly lovable, stylist. Some of you may recall that, in my last appointment, I was asked to produce a pair of handwarmers similar to those I made earlier for her only in black. With gold sparklies. And smaller. And really soft. I am disturbingly meek when it comes to my stylist. She is a tiny little woman who I could probably tuck under my arm and toss into the nearest dumpster should the urge to do so overtake me, but I never will. She has this odd power over me.

Unable to find yarn that would meet her highly specific needs, I made the decision to order the fiber and custom spin it to her desires. I was most gratified to see that it had arrived this morning and headed out for my coincidentally scheduled root touch up session with Amy prepared to share my success and receive her awe and gratitude. It was not to be.

Amy has a new project in mind for me. One to which she is so committed that she has two knitters scrambling to make it happen. It involved the examination of a purchased garment, the taking of photos (thank heavens I purchased a phone with camera-capacity) and the creation of a pattern. While pleased to see the fiber had arrived, she is so gung-ho about project #2 that she would prefer I put the handwarmers aside and get straight to work. Okey-dokey. After she burned my head, attempted to forcefully remove one of my earring with aggressive combing and left a mark on my neck with the plastic bonnet-thingie, I rushed home to begin knitting up a "prototype" of sorts. She and I will head out next weekend to purchase yarn. I will leave the garment and pattern up to the imagination for now. I've learned through bitter experience that I should limit blogging about something until I have some confidence in my ability to pull it off so I'll hold off on the details for now. It's a simple project and one that is well within my skill set, but I've gotten overconfident before. Hopefully I'll have an interesting FO to present within the next couple of weeks!

Sorry, Jaywalkers. We're talking about my stylist here. She makes me look waaaay better than you will. I'll get back to you when I can.

The best part of all this is that, while adept at getting what she wants, Amy is also charming and a dead riot. This whole process is sort of more fun than one might think. Like rollercoasters or bungee jumping. Or catching bullets with your teeth. That's right, The Sheep is addicted to high risk activities. And if you don't think that potentially screwing up a project for the individual who is responsible for the eradication of gray hair isn't high risk, then you are either significantly younger than I or far more confident in your ability to charm through personality.

And just when I thought the whole birthday thing was over and done with, it came back to haunt me on Friday. My staff, upon learning that they had missed the big day due to the fact that they were trapped in their homes by raging floodwaters, decided that they simply must have a celebration. Thus, The Sheep found herself serenaded by a group of first through fourth graders intent upon using the tune of "Happy Birthday" to impress upon their teacher that she not only resembles a primate but "smells like one, too." There was cake, though, and that sort of put a good spin on it. In addition, this card helped to make it a pretty humorous event:

Anyone out there who works with children will see the humor in this tenfold.

So now I must be off to continue working on Project "Save My Highlights." If I fail, please forward my mail to the witness protection program. Seriously...this woman wields power!!!

Wish me luck.

SA