Monday, October 20, 2008

The Truth Hurts

If you had asked me last night before I crept beneath the sheets for sleepy-time if I had done everything that needs doing in order that I might be ready for work in the morning, the answer would have been a resounding, "YES!"  

I probably also would have questioned why you were in my bedroom and interrogating me in such a fashion, but that is neither here nor there, I suppose...

You can only imagine my surprise this morning when I discovered that there were any number of things left undone and that I'd frittered away the whole evening secure in the belief that I was prepared.  The result, of course, was a frantic dash about the manse trying to prepare myself for the day.  There was much arm-flapping and tripping over kitties who really don't care if I go to work or not so long as the bowls are filled before I do whatever it is I plan on doing.

Still, I felt that I was managing pretty well time-wise.  This only made the sting of looking at the clock while I was putting together my lunch all the more painful.  6:15 had arrived and this is the absolute last second I can consider leaving the house if I am going to be on time for work.  And that's only if there are no major traffic flow issues or invasions from outer space.

With the exception of a brief stay in New Hampshire, I have lived in Maine my whole life.  And the out-of-state experience was really only due to the fact that the closest hospital happened to be there and Mommy Sheep thought it might be nice to have me in a place with doctors and lots of nice anesthetics.  You'd think that, by now, I'd have caught on to the fact that it sometimes gets a little chilly here or that I might need to occasionally scrape a bit of ice off the windshield in the morning if I want to see whilst driving.  Apparently this bit of knowledge has yet to sink in, though.  I had not factored this into the morning's routine any more than I'd factored in anything else.  Precious time was lost, but I like to think that lives were saved what with my being able to see the road and all...

I made it to school on time, but just barely.  And I didn't get to use the ladies' room before the kids came which is something of an issue for someone of my advanced years.  But there were a whole bunch of kids absent today so it all worked out for the best.  There was a free moment early enough in the day so that no dignity was lost.

I honestly and truly believed that I had dealt with that pesky matter involving my staff and the discrepancies in their time sheets a couple of weeks ago.  There was a huge miscommunication and I did everything in my power to make the administration see that cutting their hours on that one day should not have happened.  I fought the good fight.  But today that all fell apart.  There is really nothing more I can do for them.  Policy is policy and the fact that we were not made aware of the scheduling issues that day means nothing.  On the plus side, I did come across as a hero in this matter so I can bask a bit in all that glory for a second or two.  

For that matter, I also thought that I'd made myself rather clear regarding how much I would appreciate it if I were involved when any of the students on my caseload were being dealt with from a disciplinary perspective.  I am not asking for input.  I simply need to know what is happening lest I find myself wandering around the building looking for missing students who are really just detained in the office or other such places of Purgatory.  I have other stuff I could be doing, you know.  Lots of stuff.  Some of it rather important and impressive.  (Other stuff...not so much.  But it's still stuff I could be doing that doesn't involve hunting down kids who aren't even in school because they have been sent home.)

Who knew that I had so woefully underestimated the extent of my knowledge base?  I am clearly delusional because I could have sworn that I'd managed to pick up a thing or two over the past four decades.  I guess I should be paying more attention.  I'm going to put that on a sticky note and stick it somewhere where I'll be sure to see it.  "Pay attention.  You know nothing.  Love, Sheepie."  That should do the trick...

Meanwhile, there are a few things of which I am certain.  For example, I know that the work day will end and that there will probably be more positive moments than negative.  I know that, once home, I can ride my little exercise bike, watch downloaded television programs that didn't get watched over the weekend and knit on my Never-Ending Scarf.


I'm OK with the "never-ending" part.  It's nice, mindless knitting.  I know that I can do this.  Mostly.


Let's face it:  Things could be worse.  I could, for example, have to deal with the denial and level of delusion experienced by the Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty.  Several of you commented on his gi-normousness, maybe even thought that he was bigger than he used to was.  When I told you that he was on a diet, I was not kidding, people!  I'll admit that yesterday's photo wasn't the most flattering angle and all.  But he is really gi-normous!  Sometimes he just tips over and rolls a bit when performing actions that kitties have been performing since the dawn of time.  

He is still not getting it, though.  The AGK is a master of denial.  He has healthy self-esteem.  Just not such a healthy girth.


Fat?  Who calls me fat???  I is beautiful!  I knows I is beautiful!!!



I strikes a pose.  I'm gorgeous!  They alllll wants to be like me!  It's the jealousness that makes them say I's fat!


That is a level of truth avoidance to which I can only aspire...

SA

13 comments:

Julie said...

Ah yes, the pictures from the front end are much more flattering!

Kath said...

Well since I'm sure the administration would like you to inform them whenever you have been unavoidably detained or somehow prevented from arriving at your classroom as scheduled, it doesn't seem too much of a reach for you to expect to be notified when it happens to one of the children, now does it? But that's just me and my crazy thoughts!

Yes, I have also seen a chubby cat do a "roll" when assuming or completing certain postures. You had to be there when someone walked up to her and said "Awww...what a cute chubby kitty, you're so plump...are you pregnant?" At least AGK doesn't have to suffer that indignity!

trek said...

He does strikes a pose.

PS - How is the little pink ball faring?

Beth said...

Sorry I haven't checked in for a while. Your scarf is very pretty!

April said...

Did you get those pictures done at Sears?

Mia said...

well hey, Monday is over.. only a few more to go :)

Donna Lee said...

I have sympathy for the AGK. It's hard to be beautiful in a world that wants to keep you humble.

btw, I nominated you for an award.

Alwen said...

It's all fur! Really.

KnitKicky said...

Our Kitty went to the vet yesterday. She is an orange tabby who weighs in at 12.8 lbs. I was prepared for chastisement from the vet, but she just called Kitty beautiful and said she has a large frame!! I think I love my vet. Wonder if she does people?

Elaine said...

I LOVE reading your blog! I love your style, I love your humor and I love AGK and BFK. You make me happy.

Anne said...

How many more days before Xmas vacation... or maybe summer vacation?

At least you've got some actual, live knitting progress photo-ing this week. I love the colors!

Karen said...

Your scarf is coming along nicely! The yarn is lovely.
AGK isn't really fat, he's fluffy to extreme.

Knitting Linguist said...

My sympathies on your administration.

And you must admit that AGK knows how to look dignified!