Tuesday, October 21, 2008

So Totally Not Fair!!!

Back in August, a happy time when I was still on summer vacation and could knit at my leisure or nap as I saw fit, I happened to wander into school for a bit.  I was just a tad behind schedule in getting the classroom set up for the year and thought it might be a nice idea if I put a few books on the shelves or something.  It seemed like the responsible thing to do.

I arrived at my new school (the one where they have The Bad Job At The Middle School That They Tricked Me Into Taking Because No One Else Would Take It And They Knew I Could Be Coerced Through Flattery) to find some of my stuff in the lobby.  More specifically, I found my coffee maker and mini fridge.  Apparently, the insurance company had banned them from all classrooms due to their tendency to suddenly burst into flame.  This, of course, is not all that unreasonable since I have been known to forget about shutting off coffee pots in the past.  But I'm pretty sure that the whole thing wasn't actually directed at me personally or anything...

Had I really read the email that went out on the matter last spring, I would have known this.  I did not read that email.  I was too busy trying to get my head around the whole Bad Job At The Middle School thing, I suppose.  I also would have read about how microwaves were on the "Forbidden Fruit" list.  I don't have a microwave, though.  I probably wouldn't have cared too much about that.

Fast Forward To October:  My new classroom comes with its own bathroom.  I generally don't frequent it as the boys use it and they are, shall we say, "less than hygienic" at times.  However, I did venture in last Friday when one of them came out and asked me what it meant when the sink started spraying water all over the floor.

For the record, this means that Ms. Sheep needs to go into the boys' bathroom and shut off the water.  It then means that a custodian has to come in and wrap the whole sink in a trash bag so that no one will use it.  Trash bags are known for their ability to repel teen aged boys.

Now the boys can't wash their hands after using the restroom.  They have to go down the hall to do that. I don't honestly believe that anyone of them ever had any real interest in hand washing prior to being able to wander the halls, but I'm not going to stop them.  I just want them to wash their hands.  

Today, however, I found cause to wonder why it takes a healthy teen twenty minutes to wash his hands.  I came up with no reason short of his needing to perform impromptu surgery in the hallway and that just seemed unlikely.  I headed down to the boy's room to investigate.  

As I did so, I happened to pass the custodians' room.  The room belonging to the same custodians who left my fridge and coffee maker in the lobby last summer.  And what do you think I saw in there?  Any guesses?

A microwave!!!  Right out in the open for all to see!  How totally unfair is that?  They spurn my mini fridge, make it feel unwanted and unloved...but can have a microwave????  For a brief moment, I thought to stage a protest right there in the hallway outside the boys' room.

Then I remembered why I was out in the hallway in the first place.  I honestly don't have the time to go searching for boys who are out washing their hands for twenty minutes.  I decided to take the high road.  I'm sure you've all heard that old saying:  The Sheep who stages a protest outside the custodians' room shall never get her sink fixed.

Truer words were never spoken...

I don't want to think about it.  Instead, let's all enjoy the view from Sheepie's hearth and home, the place where the sinks still work and handwashing takes mere minutes:


Here we have an Absurdly Gi-normous Tushy being sported by a cat who still won't acknowledge that he is "husky."



And here we have a Big, Fluffy Kitty.  She is not fat.  Just fluffy.  And she wishes to be fed.  Now.


SA

10 comments:

Kath said...

Wow, now that's a substantial tush. But rather unfair to AGK to compare his back end with her front! Perhaps a side by side comparison would be educational?

I am the sneaky sort - I would smuggle in a mini-fridge. But I am also the sort who gets extremely grouchy when hungry.

trek said...

What? You mean you really weren't aware of all of the self-immolating mini-fridge? Why, we must have an explosion a day around these parts. Because, of course, a mini-fridge couldn't possibly be expected to do the same task as its big brother (the household fridge) and even bigger cousin (the restaurant supply chain walk in model). I mean, really, expecting a smaller appliance to operate as well as a larger one? Who expects that? We certainly don't expect smaller cell phones to work as well as the big cordless models in the manse, do we? Oh, wait - yes we do.

Put the mini-fridge in a cardboard box. Move it in under cover of darkness (perhaps even arrange for a zombie distraction at the other end of the parking lot) and stash it in the knee hole of your desk. Plug it in and do not allow anyone behind your desk. No one else belongs there anyway. Leave a large shawl or jacket hung on the back of the desk chair to act as camouflage.

trek said...

Oh, yeah, one more thing: don't let anyone touch the sides of your soda cans - you'd be busted immediately.

Julie said...

What I find amazing about this story is that a teenaged boy turned the sink on in the bathroom to begin with!

Anne said...

I'm with Julie. My entire department of 16 has to share a single-occupancy bathroom AND it is the only one on our floor so all the (teenage) students use it too. I do feel this is an inhumane working condition. 'Nuff said.

Karen said...

Can you make some sort of deal with the custodian who has a microwave? Maybe he has room for a mini fridge or a coffee maker? Or maybe he has those and they aren't visible from the door?

Cursing Mama said...

You are correct - it is not fair & if you stage a protest you will never get the sink fixed. But with a bottle of antibacterial gel & a little ingenuity you just may be able to go sink free all year...

Donna Lee said...

I have a mini fridge in my office. It was a mother's day gift from my family. I'm not sure if it's allowed. I never asked. I'm not sure i want to go back to using a small cooler. I'd sneak one if and swear the assistants to secrecy.

And no. Don't upset the custodians! You'll never get help.

knitseashore said...

The BFK can do one heck of an intimidating glare when she is hungry!

Here's hoping the sink gets repaired fast, and the boys stop wandering down the hall. Who knows what else you're going to find in those closets...a coffee maker for sure, maybe a massage chair?

Knitting Linguist said...

I vote that you bring the fridge in with a note on it that says, "Oh, yeah? What about your microwave?" That'd be mature and adultlike, which I'm all for. (Also, seriously? Probably better not to know what's going on with the hand-washing...)