I spent alot of time at the dentist as a wee, little lambie. Not due to poor dental habits or anything, but because of my small mouth. (note: anyone who knows The Sheep personally has just fallen off their chair and is currently rolling around on the floor in the throes of laughter) My teeth were too large for my tiny jawline and several had to be extracted to make room for all the gi-normous ivories. And, you know, I never had a problem with it. I was fine. Cut me open, rip things out of my head...whatever. I was a blase little bugger.
But Dr. DeSade DMD (not his real name) has instilled in me a fear of the dental chair that is just unshakable. Sadly, he also happens to be pretty good at what he does, albeit a bit rough. He is not a good listener and probably should have cocked an ear my way prior to the root canal when I happened to mention (ten times) that novacaine is not particularly effective on me. But he was able to reconstruct a tooth that was shattered below the gumline and I guess that has to count for something.
I'm still gonna be completely stressed out until my cleaning is over and I can escape the confines of the chair 'o doom.
Well, that might be true were it not for the fact that I am heading over to the mechanic to deal with my squealing truck immediately afterwards. Tomorrow is going to be a very expensive day, I fear.
As a coping mechanism I cast on and knit like a demon on a new vest from the Knitty archives:
Cuz I don't have enough garments in puke green. We all need at least one puke green vest in our wardrobe right? What can I say? My greenbacks are all currently earmarked for the dentist and the mechanic. I had to use what I had on hand. Why I had puke green yarn in my stash I do not know. It was probably some sort of yarn black-out or something. I'm not asking questions.
And, for some reason, I seem to have begun cutting pieces for a quilt. A quilt!!! This is going to be a bumpy ride, fraught with tears, tantrums and "the bad words."
Is no one going to try and stop me?????
SA
6 comments:
Hey, I printed that vest pattern last night! I've decided to make something else first. Good thing. Now I can see yours before I knit mine. It's looking great, by the way.
Okay, I was nice yesterday and didn't knock the sewing thing. 'Cause I do still sew sometimes. But today's last line was a dare.
Knit instead of quilting! Knitting is better than quilting because...
Quilts can be hard to finish. I have many quilt tops in my closet to prove it.
Knitting is more portable unless you are hand quilting. I also have a half-quilted lap quilt that I was quilting by hand.
It's easier to wear a knitted sweater than a quilt.
Yarn is softer and more cuddly than fabric.
But now that I think about it...quilts actually are very lovely and a great way to express creativity. You don't have to worry about gauge with quilts. There's nothing like a quilt on the bed. Quilts are nice gifts and they don't have to fit anyone.
Gee, that wasn't very convincing...
My dentist is totally hot a and if we had ever both been single at the same time (he was married, I was single, I got married, he got divorced, I got divorced, he got married) I would have totally asked him out. I could lay there in the chair for hours looking at my dentist. Quilting? You are cutting little pieces of fabric apart to sew them together into a different big piece of fabric?!
I could drive up an hold your hand, if you like.
Why not takr your pointiest knitting needles with you, then you can "accidentally" stab Dr DeSade if he makes inappropiate remarks.
You'll do fine .. but I agree with annie, take your knitting .. dentists are usually better behaved when the patient is armed.
Here's the thing: my dentist when I was in high school was a smoker - a heavy smoker. Just imagine yellow, smoke-scented fingers in your mouth. NOT pretty. Also, I've decided that dentists are on a par with used-car salesmen - they show me an x-ray of my mouth and tell me that I need a "deep cleaning" - one where they strip away the gums to clean the teeth under the gums, and point rather importantly to something that I absolutely CANNOT see on the x-ray. And THEN they tell me that it'll be $800 for the root canal, and ANOTHER $800 for the crown to cover the now-dead tooth. I don't think so!
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