It Was "Need To Know."

It is 7:30 on a Sunday morning and I am wracked with guilt. Wracked, I tellya!!! I've been in this state since Friday night and must now purge myself of this horrific emotion lest I explode and get angst-goo all over my couch.

I knew several things on Friday:

*I knew that I don't normally post on Friday nights.

*I knew that I wouldn't be posting on Saturday.

*I knew that I really should drop a note on Friday night.

*I knew that I couldn't.

*I knew that I have a long and illustrious history as The Worst Of Secret-Keepers.

I don't mean to be bad with secrets. I am not a gossip. I don't share things in a mean-spirited kind of way. I just tend to be impulsive and something of a gabber. One minute I am in the middle of an interesting story about the invention of cheese and the next I am finding a way to mention that Bob is having an eyebrow lift even though he made me swear that this information would never leave my lips.

It is best to just not talk at all.

SIL Sheep has been planning Baby Brother Sheep's surprise 40th birthday party for some time now. I agreed to head over early and spend Saturday helping her with the general preparations. Between that and the event itself, I would be out of the house and unbloggable for the full day. I could have just dropped a note on Friday, mentioned that I had plans for the next day and been done with it.

But I am the one who lets the cat out of the bag whether I mean to release that feline or not.

There was every reason to believe that someone else had already done this. We couldn't be certain that he'd heard the vague reference to his party, but it was possible that BBS knew perfectly well what was going on. At the very least, he probably suspected. Were I to say that I'd not be blogging on Saturday and were he to read the blog that day, I would only confirm the whole thing.

I locked my lips and tossed the key. This time, it was so totally not going to be me that ruined the whole thing for everyone and made me the bitter subject of social gatherings for the next calendar year.

If it makes you feel any better, my denying you all access to yet another cat story, excuses for not knitting and random videos of long-disbanded 80's bands was a successful strategy. I arrived at my parent's home almost on time to be helpful to my Sis-By-Marriage. I only had to go back to the store once to purchase the things she'd asked for rather than the things that I bought the first time when I wasn't paying attention. I stirred and chopped as directed. At the appointed hour, I made the phone call to BBS with news of the break-in at the house. With just the right amount of girlish-timidness, I begged him to come over and stand by my side in case the nefarious thieves were still inside waiting to do harm unto my fragile self and to help me make the dreaded phone call to Daddy Sheep informing him of the situation. He, being the good brother that he is, rushed to my side and all indications are that he was quite surprised by the gathering of friends and family there to wish him well in his new state of old.

It went well. There were the usual party-glitches, of course. There may have been too much food for any human being to consume, but leftovers are the best part of any social gathering, in my opinion. It was a little tricky shuttling everyone's cars to an off-site location. And why people keep inviting The Best Man From BBS's Wedding And Long Time Family Friend to these things is just beyond me. We all know that he is going to continue telling that outrageously false story about me drinking 5 Long Island Iced Teas in a Salt Lake City bar. This is nothing short of slander since I would never do such a thing. If I was in a Salt Lake City bar, I am certain that it was to keep an eye on everyone else and to ensure the safety of all present. I was probably also handing out pamphlets on the dangers of excessive alcohol consumption and leading the patrons in a rousing sing-a-long extolling the praises of fresh milk and home baked cookies.

I can't be certain. I don't actually remember the exact sequence of events. But I'm fairly certain that it went something like that...

So there you have it: the reason behind the radio silence and an explanation for a marked lack of knitting yesterday. My intentions were noble. Rest assured, regular blogging will commence as of today and, with a week's vacation before me, I can assure you that there will be an improvement in the situation around here. Why, I've already started a new project, ripped it once and cast on again with more attention to that one spot where the stitches always twist the first time through. I'd show you a picture, but I sort of forgot the camera at the party site and will need to go retrieve it before I can back up my bold statements. I'm not doing that today, though. I need a day to recover.

The keeping of classified information and whatnot is really quite exhausting...

SA