Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Role Rules

I mean, really!  Is it too much to ask?  There is a certain way of going about things and if people aren't going to fall into line, then we will have utter chaos on our hands here!

I am the quirky, funny, irresponsible one.  That is my job.  I am the one who is supposed to not really plan ahead and yet somehow pull off whatever it is I was supposed to be doing.  Or, at the very least, I will charmingly fake my way along.  This is my role in life.  I am the lovable screw up.

However, this whole thing hinges on the behavior of The Responsible People.  I can't very well go about the business of being all kooky and devil-may-care if they don't march along behind me and pick up the slack.  The entire plan is going to fall apart no matter how well I do my job once people start abandoning their posts.  It's really all about respecting the craft.  It's not easy not doing all that stuff.  And it takes teamwork to make it all come together.

You would think that, being Responsible People, they would have a better grasp of this
concept. 

You can imagine my chagrin when, upon arriving at the high school this morning to fake my way through teaching that Safety Procedures course for which I had not prepared at all, I learned that at least one of my co-teachers hadn't bothered to crack the binder last night either.  That did not fit into my "vision" for this day at all!  

The plan goes like this:  I say I am going to study my binder and prepare to teach the class.  I then flip through it casually for ten minutes, decide that this is more than enough time spent on the matter and go watch TV.  The following day, I will muddle my way through the class, charm people shamelessly when I don't really know what I am doing and be remembered as The Funny One.

The Responsible People get to do everything else.  And they won't mind one little bit because they like having someone there who can entertain people into forgetting that they are at a mandatory training.

Fortunately, my other teaching partner managed to read a little bit further in the binder and also remembered to copy the training booklets for the class.  She even bound them in those plastic thingies so that they would stay open without the participants having to prop them into position with their water bottles.  Without her forethought, we'd probably still be sitting there trying to figure out what page we were supposed to be on...

I did my best.  I broke out my most charming routines and disarming looks.  I even remembered a few things from the trainer's manual and dutifully taught them like I was supposed to.  But the whole thing felt rather strained.  I was so distracted by the worry over what my role was in this whole fiasco that it was hard to focus.  

Frankly, I'd have expected better from The Responsible People.  I have half a mind to actually read that stupid manual for the session next week and see how they like it when someone takes over their job!  That'll teach 'em!!!

On the plus side, I did learn that one of co-teachers is a spinner.  I didn't know that.  It's kind of unusual to run into a spinner out in the wild and rather nice to be able to chat about the craft.  (since she was the one who actually made an attempt at being responsible and allowing me to do my wacky thing, I felt that it was acceptable to engage with her...)  I also worked on the second of The Happy Pink Socks during lunch and that helped to soothe me a bit before fake-teaching the second half of the class.

At least the whole thing is over for the week.  Hopefully, my fellow instructors will get their acts together before the next one so we can do this thing the way it is supposed to be done.  I'm all for doing things correctly.  If we each step up and do our jobs according to our natures, then I think we will have a much better experience for the final portion of this course.

I can't help but fume over their lack of Responsibility, though.  I'll probably be thinking about it all night.  Expecting me to do not only my job but also theirs...the nerve!!!!  I had to stand up to teach stuff at least three times, for crying out loud!!!!

Meanwhile, why don't you look at some spinning?  I'm a spinning fool these days, it seems.  However, I am going to suggest that you all take a minute to don protective eyewear.  I realize that this request isn't exactly the sort of thing a wacky, irresponsible gal would do, but I honestly do fear for your retinas should you not take proper precautions.  There's being a lovable goofball and then there's being open to lawsuits...

Are you all set?  Good....


If not, you have only yourself to blame.  I tried to tell you...


If nothing else, you should at least squint a bit...









Don't look directly at it.  This is not the sort of fiber that does well with a flash.  It gets even more laser-like on the eyes.


It's really rather pretty in real life and has the added benefit of acting as a nightlight when I get up in the wee hours for a drink of water or something.  I'm not sure just what this yarn is destined to become, but I can assure you that it will be noticed!

Maybe I'll have it finished in time to knit up a nice binder cozy for my Safety Procedures manual.  Then I won't have to bother studying up on next week's material.  People will be so taken unawares by the cacophony of colors that they won't even notice that I don't really know how to do a choke-hold release...

This plan is, of course, contingent upon The Responsible People getting their ducks in a row.  Without their behaving according to the pre-arranged plan then there is no amount of neon merino that is going to help me...

SA

15 comments:

kmkat said...

My husband takes the same approach to teaching as you. Personally, I prefer taking classes from your sort of teachers -- more fun. Who cares if I know how to do a choke hold? I had fun!

trek said...

*Three times*?! Oh the sheer horror! What next, zombies?

Mel said...

Gosh darn them to heck, I say. Hopefully they'll shape up.

Kath said...

Wow, I think discovering that your co-teacher spins is basically worth the price of admission of that whole safety teaching experience. Perhaps next week you could each bring in a drop spindle and entertain the the class with that?

As for the spinning you've got going there...whoa. I like bright but...wow. Dare I ask what weight you are going for there? 'Cause I'm thinking if you combined that yarn with another in a more neutral color in a slip stitch/mosaic pattern it could look really cool.

Beth said...

How rude? Some people can be so inconsiderate. You, on the other hand, were very considerate to warn us of the brightness of your new, beautiful spinning. :)

Beth said...

Oops - I meant "How rude!"

catsmum said...

the NERVE of some people !!
:]

Julie said...

Jeez, the nerve of some people! I hope they smarten up next week so you don't have to get up THREE whole times; that's just unacceptable!

Mia said...

nice nightlight - and bright too!

Donna Lee said...

I use power point slides (having children who can use the program was a big help) to distract the groups from the fact that I am not standing in front of them and speaking.

Anonymous said...

On behalf of "The Responsible People" may I offer my most abject apologies? I blame actors. Really. They are always saying how difficult it is being amusing, doing comedy and by contrast serious is easy. So I'm sure what happened is that your particular Responsible Person wanted to make your life easier by taking on the 'Fun Person" role. Except her amateur fun self forgot to check with you, the Mistress of Fun. No? Okay we blew it and it won't happen again. Berta

Knitting Linguist said...

Wow! That is some neon yarn. I like your teaching style, though -- it's one that I subscribe to myself. I wonder if anyone's noticed yet?

Karen said...

Wow that yarn is going to be stunning.

April said...

Holy jeepers.

That's ... bright.

Cathy said...

zounds. I carelessly laughed off your warning and dashed down to the photo.

Talk about a night light. I thought it was the full moon rising in the east (again)... now I know it was your spinning.