Hey, Karma!

Yeah...you. I'm talking to you. I get it, already. Message received. We dance this little dance you and I. I do something stupid. You get me. I mock and taunt you, refusing to learn my lesson. You get me again. We go back and forth, to and fro, never resolving the issue. Back when it was just my truck you were fiddling with, I felt pretty comfortable giving you the one-finger salute with a side of raspberry. The endless engine break-downs and writing of the checks were a nuisance, I suppose. But it was really rather comical overall and I am a tough old bird. I could take it.

But, you've crossed the line. I know now that there is no low to which you won't stoop. I get it. You are the winner in this little stand-off. I have learned my lesson and will now put my humbleness out there for all the world to see. For I now realize the following:

Openly mock Baby Brother Sheep repeatedly for his lack of fundraising ability towards our Relay For Life walk and credit this showboating for lifting you up from the depths of a summer cold to the heights of good health...

And you will get a fever within an hour of doing so. The fever will last into the next day. It will not spike high enough for the school nurse to send you home. Heavens, no! It will linger at around 99-100 degrees. This isn't a drama-producing fever. But, if your normal body temperature is around 97 and change then it is enough to make you achy and grumpy. And more grumpy.

So please let me take this opportunity to state clearly and for the record:

Baby Brother Sheep is a fine young man who has recently started a new job and has been a bit busy of late.

Baby Brother Sheep has appeared numerous times on local television presenting those really impressive checks that came about as a result of his fundraising on a much larger scale for the Multiple Sclerosis Telethon.

Baby Brother Sheep came over last year when I had the Monkey Pox to help try and fix my truck even though he had other things to do.

Baby Brother Sheep and I have traveled together quite a bit around the great western side of this country and there aren't many big sisters who can say that they looked forward to those trips with a younger sib.

Baby Brother Sheep does most of the driving when I don't feel like taking my own vehicle and never, ever complains about it.

Baby Brother Sheep brought New Girlfriend Sheep Who We Like (and isn't new anymore, really) to the family and she is awesome in every way that you want a sister to be.

Baby Brother Sheep did not deserve to be maligned and it was really just my attempt at inflating my own sad little ego when I pointed out on several occasions that I have raised more money than he has. A lot more money. So much more that it is just sad, really. How does it benefit anyone to see the great contributions I have made to the cure for cancer while he has done less? None. It is just grandstanding. And I should not do that at the expense of one so wonderful as Baby Brother Sheep. Not for something so trivial as my having raised more money than my younger brother who is better at this than I. It would be wrong...so very wrong.

There. Happy now, stupid Karma? You can take back the fever and the cough now. There is no need to take this to the next level. None, whatsoever. I have a sweet, striped sockie to knit and some new fibers to get spinning on. I don't have time for this. And, for the record, I am not scared of getting Monkey Pox. This is not Monkey Pox. Now that I know the difference between "general malaise" and "waving at grammy in the light" I cannot be so easily shaken. I do, however, concede defeat. You win. I lose.

Off to take some ibuprofen with a side of cough drops. And knit hats for frozen children. And roll quarters to buy Botox for aging starlets. And cobble shoes for the unfashionably shod. Whatever it takes...

Make Karma go away, please.

SA