Thursday, May 03, 2007

More Knitting With Children...

First, just a couple of quick updates:

1. Relay For Life Sponsorship Drive: Your generosity has helped to move my team into the top five fundraising teams for the event!!! For a while there, we were in fourth, but we apparently instilled a great deal of fear in a couple of the other teams and they kicked it into gear. But, there is still plenty of time to move up in the rankings! And, not that this has any bearing on anything whatsoever...I'm just mentioning it in passing is all...but I am still beating Baby Brother Sheep quite handily in the sponsorship department! Remember, there will be a prize drawing for those of you who enter! A gift certificate to Goose Pond or a lovely set of stitch markers from the talented Mouse are just waiting to go to someone's mailbox!

2. The verdict is officially in: My group, against all odds except the one where the professor gives everyone pretty much the same grade just for getting up and doing it, managed to score an "A" on our presentation. I have gotten some pretty good feedback from others in our class, although I suspect there is some charity involved here...this was really quite the snooze-fest. My staff noticed that I seemed much more relaxed today. "Lighter" was the actual term used, I believe. I guess I hadn't realized just how heavily all this stuff was weighing on me. I really did feel pretty darned great today.

3. I don't know if anyone is keeping track of my grocery shopping catastrophes. I know that there are those who take great pleasure in that which goes awry as I try to bring sustenance and shiny objects into my life through the exchange of money for goods. Today's incident took place at the large Super Store Place. There was the usual announcement to the general public that seems to take place when I leave the house and head for a store. "Please drop what you are doing and head to the local (insert store name here) and proceed to immediately stand in the middle of the aisles chatting or drop pickle jars on the floor! This is not a drill! We repeat: this is not a drill! The Sheep will be arriving in mere minutes and we want to make sure that she gets that heart rate up as high as possible!" Today's insanity was brought to you courtesy of a toddler who decided to try and take a little nap in the giant bags of dog food. I don't have a dog and, hence, do not need dog food. But there was a general feeling amongst my fellow shoppers that this was just about the cutest thing since puppies were actually invented and this led to some gawking. As you can imagine, there was something of a bottleneck in the pet department which affected those of us who needed cat food.

Sheesh.

OK, that's it for the updates. Now about that knitting with the children. It seems that I have been volunteered for yet another field trip with the fifth grade and their teacher, The AntiKnitter. Having recently graduated from the school's drug and alcohol resistance education program, the little darlings have all earned a fabulous field trip to a local house of bowling. That's right. Bowling. With children. And, as if that weren't fabulous enough, we will be joined by several members of the local constabulary who teach the program to the students. So, to recap, you got The Sheep, The AntiKnitter, The Cops and Eight Million Children at a bowling alley. For several hours. All together. Bowling.

For several hours.

I plan to hide in the arcade and knit for the duration. We all know that this won't work. Children develop super-keen senses when they are in a bowling alley. They want you to bowl with them because the shoes are so darned cool and they will seek you out no matter where you may lurk. They will hunt for you in packs. They will bring in the dogs if necessary. Other teachers will rat you out in the time it takes to find a good hiding place because if they have to bowl, you have to bowl.

And the staff code of conduct in my school, while not specific with regard to the abuse of children via the poking with dpns, does not encourage such behavior. I'm hoping for a knee or back injury to suddenly materialize sometime over the next 12 hours. I know I won't be so lucky...but a girl can hope, right?

Oh, and it turns out that I am also the designated Keeper Of The Asthma Inhalers, an honor conferred upon me by the school nurse. I must dispense the puff of life to anyone who may have some sort of an attack while on our little junket.

Apparently, The AntiKnitter forgets and takes them home after field trips.

SA

12 comments:

April said...

Just don't get your hand stuck in the ball. I imagine that it would be quite difficult to knit with bowling ball hands. And don't you dare wear your beautiful hand knit socks in those stinky shoes!

Other than that, have a GREAT time!

*smirk*

trek said...

The AntiKnitter "forgot" to return the asthma inhalers and now he DOESN'T EVER HAVE TO CARRY THEM AGAIN.

Sheila said...

Trek is onto something there. just saying....

Beth said...

How in the world did you get volunteered for that?! Maybe they'll turn the Cosmic Bowling lights on. That might help a little. :)

Anonymous said...

Oh gee. Have fun. If you should happen to be standing near the Antiknitter with a bowling ball in your hand, um, never mind.
By the way, my verification word is "ekbrf". I guess Blogger isn't too happy with bowling either.
Karen
http://nothingbutknit.blog-city.com/

Anne said...

Gee. Bowling? (Why do I always try to spell it "boweling"...hmm.... food for thought there). I have never ever set foot into a boweling...damn it... bowling alley, and refuse ever to do so. It's a matter of pride. Enjoy yourself.

Cursing Mama said...

anit-knitters do tend to be forgetful.

mehitabel said...

Thank you for the reminder, once again, why I'm glad I'm no longer teaching! Try the Los Angeles Zoo. On a hot June day. With 82 kids and one other teacher. Gaaaahh!

Knittymama said...

Oh, I only read for the grocery store updates, you know...

I feel your pain on the whole bowling thing. I try hard to avoid all such "out of school" duties:-)

Lorraine said...

Hmmm, make sure you bring a washable knitting project, preferably in a dark color. Those greasy bowling balls leave marks. Go ahead and ask me how I know.

Lazuli said...

Good luck with the bowling! It sounds ... intimidating.

Jeanne said...

Congratulations on the A! I hate group projects. Hope the bowling was fun.