Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Hey, Karma!

Yeah...you. I'm talking to you. I get it, already. Message received. We dance this little dance you and I. I do something stupid. You get me. I mock and taunt you, refusing to learn my lesson. You get me again. We go back and forth, to and fro, never resolving the issue. Back when it was just my truck you were fiddling with, I felt pretty comfortable giving you the one-finger salute with a side of raspberry. The endless engine break-downs and writing of the checks were a nuisance, I suppose. But it was really rather comical overall and I am a tough old bird. I could take it.

But, you've crossed the line. I know now that there is no low to which you won't stoop. I get it. You are the winner in this little stand-off. I have learned my lesson and will now put my humbleness out there for all the world to see. For I now realize the following:

Openly mock Baby Brother Sheep repeatedly for his lack of fundraising ability towards our Relay For Life walk and credit this showboating for lifting you up from the depths of a summer cold to the heights of good health...

And you will get a fever within an hour of doing so. The fever will last into the next day. It will not spike high enough for the school nurse to send you home. Heavens, no! It will linger at around 99-100 degrees. This isn't a drama-producing fever. But, if your normal body temperature is around 97 and change then it is enough to make you achy and grumpy. And more grumpy.

So please let me take this opportunity to state clearly and for the record:

Baby Brother Sheep is a fine young man who has recently started a new job and has been a bit busy of late.

Baby Brother Sheep has appeared numerous times on local television presenting those really impressive checks that came about as a result of his fundraising on a much larger scale for the Multiple Sclerosis Telethon.

Baby Brother Sheep came over last year when I had the Monkey Pox to help try and fix my truck even though he had other things to do.

Baby Brother Sheep and I have traveled together quite a bit around the great western side of this country and there aren't many big sisters who can say that they looked forward to those trips with a younger sib.

Baby Brother Sheep does most of the driving when I don't feel like taking my own vehicle and never, ever complains about it.

Baby Brother Sheep brought New Girlfriend Sheep Who We Like (and isn't new anymore, really) to the family and she is awesome in every way that you want a sister to be.

Baby Brother Sheep did not deserve to be maligned and it was really just my attempt at inflating my own sad little ego when I pointed out on several occasions that I have raised more money than he has. A lot more money. So much more that it is just sad, really. How does it benefit anyone to see the great contributions I have made to the cure for cancer while he has done less? None. It is just grandstanding. And I should not do that at the expense of one so wonderful as Baby Brother Sheep. Not for something so trivial as my having raised more money than my younger brother who is better at this than I. It would be wrong...so very wrong.

There. Happy now, stupid Karma? You can take back the fever and the cough now. There is no need to take this to the next level. None, whatsoever. I have a sweet, striped sockie to knit and some new fibers to get spinning on. I don't have time for this. And, for the record, I am not scared of getting Monkey Pox. This is not Monkey Pox. Now that I know the difference between "general malaise" and "waving at grammy in the light" I cannot be so easily shaken. I do, however, concede defeat. You win. I lose.

Off to take some ibuprofen with a side of cough drops. And knit hats for frozen children. And roll quarters to buy Botox for aging starlets. And cobble shoes for the unfashionably shod. Whatever it takes...

Make Karma go away, please.

SA

15 comments:

trek said...

Bang - shot the bad karma dead - right between the eyes.

Feel better, Sheepie.

Mouse said...

I've been wondering what I did to dear old Karma lately myself. Feel better soon!

Julie said...

Well, that should certainly satisfy Karma. You are nothing if not humble. I predict you will wake tomorrow feeling like a new Sheep.

Emma said...

Sorry, darling, but I totally tagged you on a meme. You now have to reveal 7 weird things about yourself.

I am just interested to see how you narrow it down.

Mel said...

Okay, so I just doubled BBS's total to help boost your karma by proxy. Hope it helps.

Bobbi said...

oh! you must let me know if this works! The gods are very angry with me as of late, and I'm in the process of determining where I can find a live chicken* to sacrifice on their behalf.

*no actual chickens were harmed in the writing of this comment.

Beth said...

I'm sad to hear that you still aren't feeling better yet. Did you go to the doctor today?

Jeanne said...

My Dogma just ran over your Karma. That should help somewhat.

(Feel better soon!)

catsmum said...

Okay so you've upset Karma, I get that, but what the hell did I do to get MY code in da dose, huh ?
sending you virtual chicken soup :]

Anonymous said...

Please feel better. Keep your head down and maybe Karma will move on to someone else. But please, not me.
Karen
http://nothingbutknit.blog-city.com/

Julie said...

You've been tagged :-) Check out my post today to see what it's about.

Oh pooh, I see I've been beat by Emma!

Mia said...

um.. sheepie.. sorry to hear about your karma situation and all (it seems we share).. but can I borrow your awesome baby brother sheepie for a few days *grin* He sounds pretty darn cool and my car HAS been sounding a little funny....

The Purloined Letter said...

Hope you feel much better soon. Karma is dogging all of us pretty hard these days, it seems.

Annie said...

Is it a full moon?! Hope you feel better soon. :)

kmkat said...

Tell that nasty karma that kat has a big klub and ain't afraid to use it. Hope you are feeling better already.

I was gonna tag you for an 8-random-facts-about-myself but I see you are fully tagged up already. Darn. Gotta find another victi--, er, blogger.