Party Sheep!

I'm at that stage of life where most of my peers are of the "married with children" subset. As the lone single gal in the gaggle, I'm often the object of envy, what with my freedom and all. Sure, they have little people who are obligated to puree their frozen pizza for them in their golden years...but they are often tethered to hearth, home and a conventional lifestyle. I, on the other hand, am footloose and fancy-free! So, to all my settled friends out there, I give you: New Year's Rocking Eve, Sheep Style!!!

(note: there were pictures planned for this post. Blogger considered my request. Then said, "no." Repeatedly. I'm not so footloose that I am not subject to one or two masters)

Date: December 31st, 2006 Place: Casa De Sheepie

6:00 p.m.: Dress for the evening. Due to the celebratory nature of the date, it is decided to go for the clean flannel p.j.'s rather than the ones worn since the middle of last week.

6:45 p.m.: Remove leftover frozen pizza from oven. Arrange artistically on plate. Admire while pizza cools. Photograph for future generations to admire.

7:20 p.m.: Commence sock knitting.

8:00 p.m.: Briefly debate whether to drink Mountain Dew from champagne glass to add a festive touch. Remember that we tried this last year and had to get up every ten minutes to refill the glass. Champagne glasses don't hold much. Abandon this plan and continue drinking from Supersized plastic tumbler.

8:10 p.m.: Still wanting a more classed-up method of soda consumption, decided to henceforth drink Mountain Dew with pinky extended. Discover the cup is too heavy for this.

8: 12 p.m.: Mop up Mountain Dew from carpet and couch. Change flannel pajamas.

9:22 p.m.: Assemble cats for a discussion regarding their behavior during the past year. Offer constructive suggestions for improvement in the New Year. Attempt to demonstrate litterbox cleaning methods.

9:30 p.m.: Realize that cats have departed for parts unknown. Search briefly. Lose interest. Resume sock knitting.

9:45 p.m.: Run out of Mountain Dew. Panic. Consider drinking water for the remainder of the evening as it is a healthier choice.

10:00 p.m.: Throw coat over pajamas and make a 7-11 run for more Mountain Dew.

10:16 p.m.: Return home. Make the same joke several times with regard to how you can now say that you went, "out" on New Year's Eve. Laugh uproariously. Ignore disdainful looks on the faces of the recently returned felines.

10:34 p.m.: Note sock progress. Determine that this sock can be finished by midnight easily! Strain shoulder whilst patting own back.

10:35 p.m.: Beautifully wound yarn ball suddenly turns into a time bomb and self-destructs into a mass of tangled sock yarn. Neighbors are startled by loud howling noises from Sheep residence.

10:46 p.m.: Painstakingly rescue a length of yarn that should complete the sock. Swear a lot.

11:20 p.m.: Take a break from sock knitting and contemplate a Toblerone bar. Wonder why it is triangular. Determine that it makes it taste better. Test theory by eating entire bar.

11:25 p.m.: Read Toblerone nutrition info. Realize fat content. Weep softly into nearly-completed sock.

11:45 p.m. Knit furiously. Question why the heck it is so important to finish this stupid thing in '06. Fail to come up with an answer, but knit on anyway.

11:57 p.m.: Kitchener toe of sock. Weave ends. Put on foot. Wave foot in air and sing, "We Are The Champions." Cats depart once more for quieter locales.

12:01 a.m.: Become distracted by images of happy, frolicking peoples on the television. Realize that, for the second year in a row, the actual transition from year to year has been missed. Try to find the will to care. Can't. Return to admiring sock.

From this point until 2:00 in the a.m. I pretty much untangled sock yarn. I woke up this morning as achy and bleary eyed as if I'd spent the night dancing and pounding Long Island Iced Teas. But, the yarn was successfully teased from it's spaghetti-like state and sock #2 has been on the needles since 7:00 this morning.

So, there you have it! A wild and crazy night in the life of this partying Sheep. Not everyone can maintain this lifestyle, I realize. Thus, I consider it a public service to bring it to all of you who lead more sedate lives.

Tomorrow, I must return to the classroom, however. The vacation is over and my life of leisure has ended. (some might say, "not with a bang, but a whimper") It's for the best, really. It's not like I can keep this up for any length of time, really. And the jobs are what support this lifestyle, dontcha know.

That and the cats have asked to have the house back. They find my wild and crazy ways somewhat disruptive.

SA