Thursday, August 21, 2008

Up And At 'Em!

Today was the day.  No more excuses.  It is late August and, in a very short period of time, I will be expected to stand up in front of a group of boys and teach them something.  I will be expected to do this for something along the lines of seven hours and the thinking is that I will do it with great gusto.  Perhaps that I will even be a little bit prepared.

The fact that I had not yet even unpacked the classroom and had spent the first three days of this week coming up with ever more creative excuses for not going to school to take care of this little matter might present a problem.  I'd put it off long enough.  Today was the day.

To that end, I decided that this morning should be something of a dry run with the schedule.  Now, don't misunderstand me, here.  On a regular school day, I am up at 5:00 and out the door around 6:00 (when the planets align and I can find matching shoes, at any rate...).  I had absolutely no intention of doing that on a Thursday in August!  However, setting the alarm for 6:00 seemed reasonable.  It would allow for some "flex" in the schedule.  I was going to need "flex" after a summer of lolling about.

I even got myself a new alarm clock.  The one I've had since high school still works perfectly and I hated to retire it.  But after mumble-mumble years of listening to its clarion call, I'm afraid I've learned to tune it out.  That doesn't bode well for waking up in time to get to school in the mornings.  I dutifully read the manual and set up the clock to wake me with a crowing rooster sound.  I figured that would get my attention.  

Now, I don't claim to be a mechanical engineer nor a rocket scientist.  But, I do fairly well with the setting up and assembling of stuff.  I'm a single gal from way back and I'd be sitting on boxes while whittling because the TV won't work if I didn't learn how to wrangle a wire or two.  

However, it seems that I lack the technical know-how required to turn on an alarm before retiring for the evening.  6:00 came and went, but there was no rooster crowing at me.  I'd failed the test run miserably.

Fortunately, I have a back-up system in place.  Here's the thing:  if you forget to fill the cat bowls before you go to bed ( seems I forgot a lot of stuff last night) then you will be awakened at 5:00 in the oh-my-god-are-you-kidding-me-with-this morning by a certain sound:

Meow?  Meow?  Meow.  Meow!  Meow-meow!  Meow-meow-meow!!!  Meow-meow-meow-meow-meow-meow!!!!!!!!!  MEOW!!!!!

For the record, I did not get up.  I know that I have failed miserably in my parenting of these felines and that they pretty much do whatever they want.  I am fully aware of the fact that I have lost, not just the battle, but the whole stupid war and that I now live in a state of perpetual servitude.  But even I am not going to get out of bed to feed an Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty at 5:00 in the morning on a Thursday in August.  I mumbled things best not repeated here and pulled the covers over my head for another hour.  

He continued his reminders regarding the empty bowls.  AGKs are nothing if not determined.

On the plus side, it sort of negates the need for that alarm clock.  Although I hesitate to consider this a foolproof plan for getting out of bed.  I can't believe that I will be allowed to get away with the lack of nighttime feeding for much longer.

I gots a biiig belly.  Takes lots 'n lots to fill it!

It was a shaky start, I'll grant you.  But I did manage to get into school, unpack the stuff (mostly...I hid the rest in the storage closet), meet with the teacher who ran the program last year and even get some grocery shopping done on the way home.  I still need to go back one more time next week, but the worst is over.  

And it was all done without the benefit of a crowing rooster.  

With that task behind me, it is time to look ahead to the weekend.  I fear there may be a bit of spotty posting in the days to come.  I shall be celebrating the impending nuptials of Baby Brother Sheep and Future SIL Sheep by participating in a ritual known as The Bachelorette Party.  I have never attended one of these functions before so I cannot speak with any real authority here.  But my research into the subject leads me to believe that I may be a bit hampered by all the whooping and general merriment.  Just in case there is a lapse in the blogging behavior, here's a little spinning action for ya'....just to tide you over:

Shetland/Silk blend.  Yeah...still working on that.  

It is also my understanding that there may be other issues involved following a successful Bachelorette Party.  I believe that there is a very good chance that I will be spending some time as a guest of the county and defending myself against at least three counts of Stuff That Is Too Horrible To Mention In Polite Company And Even Made The Judge Wince as well as one count of Endangering The Welfare Of A Billy Goat.  At least that's what they tell me.  And if you do it right...

Contributions to my bail monies should be sent to Sheepie (aka Inmate #3608) c/o General Delivery.  



trek said...

Hey, you always claim that this is a G-rated blog! We can't be having the star of the show entertaining at Alzatraz, now can we?

Good luck with the rooster...

Mia said...

hee hee, ha ha.. sorry sheepie.. but I get woken up by miss kitty pawing LOUDLY at the door at the tinsiest sound out of me in the morning. I've got to lock her out for God's sake or I'd never get any sleep!

Anonymous said...

I think you need to make a trip to the store before the celebrating begins. The shopping list should include: Tylenol, Tums, and lots of diet Mt. Dew :-)

Kath said...

Awwwww....but he's just so darn cute! How could you possibly be expected to resist that face? And besides - as active as he's been - I'm sure he's burning it off!

But seriously - several years ago we had a young male cat who was eating an awful lot of food. The vet recommended changing to a different (and more expensive) brand with less filler material. That did the trick.

Anonymous said...

AGK has mastered the art of looking reproachful and cute at the same time. Not an easy task, that.

If you are going to be a guest of the county for any length of time, that sort of obviates the need to ready the classroom, doesn't it?

Karen said...

Have a fun weekend but not too much fun. Those poor kitties would be at a loss if you had to do time.

Cursing Mama said...

Since all is G-rated here on the bloggy please promise me you'll send me an email about the goat. It must be an east coast thing, because the only farm animals we've ever endangered were dairy cows.

crzjane said...

poor Sheepie. It's no fun going to work. Not much play time left for you. Sorry.

Donna Lee said...

Good for you getting that first day in the classroom over with. I have never been to a bachelorette party either. I wonder if there will be strippers.....

Knitting Linguist said...

Kitty alarm clocks are the best. No? Well, maybe not... Try not to end up in jail if you possibly can!