Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Procrastinating Does Not Pay

All you folks out there who have finished up the taxes in a timely fashion (in January, I'm certain), gotten your refund and already sensibly invested it in some sort of high yield thingie of a financial nature will be pleased to know that I have completed my own taxes.  It really isn't all that complicated now that we live in the good old electronic age and can just push buttons.  Frankly, I can whip out a pretty decent looking tax return in about an hour.  

I have not, however, pushed the button that will send it to the nice people at the Internal Revenue Service who are, no doubt, eagerly awaiting it so they can give my math the once-over.  E-Filing is also rather easy and the price of it is included in the cost of the tax package I purchase each year.  Well...the Federal return is.  I'll have to pay for the state one, but it's really not such a big deal.  I just haven't done it yet.  That would spoil the game.  Every year, I look forward to a nice round of Russian Roulette with my taxes.  How far can I go with it?  How long will I dare to wait before finally cracking and hitting "send?"  Just how strong is my resolve?  It's like a game of chicken with my finances and my freedom.  Will this be the year that they throw me in a Federal penitentiary for failing to report my vast riches?

I play the same sort of game with my yearly vehicle inspection.  I like to think that the rumors of a one month grace period with regard to getting that little sticker are all true.  One day, I'm sure that faith will be put to the test.  Time will tell...

But it's not as much fun as the tax game.  And, for those of you who may be wondering, that soft "thumping" you are hearing right about now is the sound of poor Kat pounding her head against a desk, a wall or any other available surface.  I am a trial to that woman.  I know this.  I feel badly about it, really badly.  But the rules of the game are clear and who am I to fly in the face of tradition?

What takes this little game from the "mildly amusing" to the "are you kidding me with this, you silly Sheepie????" is the fact that I am getting a refund this year.  A rather impressive one when compared to past years, if you want the truth.  I could get me some nice new yarn and a whole big box of cookies, if I wanted to.  Or pay off some bills.  It would be a nice little windfall.  

But, I'm waiting because tradition is important.  Our society doesn't value tradition like it used to.  I'm waiting.  My finger is on the "send" button.  But, I am waiting.  

(Um...Kat?  You ok over there?  I swear to you that they will make it on time.  Pinky swear, even!  Just think about how the battery light is back on in my truck and how I'm considering putting a piece of black electrical tape over it so it doesn't exist anymore.  That'll take your mind right off my irresponsible taxing ways!)

It's a good thing I have my little game of cat 'n mouse going with the IRS.  Work continues to vex me and I spent several minutes in the office today making sure that the school secretaries know to call a fireman and a bakery should there be reports of me on the roof.  I will only come down for a fireman with a chocolate cake.  You may think I am kidding about this but, as God is my witness, they were actually taking notes. 

I have also made some sort of odd and utterly inexplicable error on the Invisibility Shawl and will need to do a little of the tinking tonight if I want to make it all go away.  It's that or resort to the lifeline, but that is kind of far back and I just can't bear the thought of ripping back to where I was on Saturday.  I'm going to have to weigh my options here.  Deadline knitting requires efficient decision making.  I'm thinking I maybe should have started this project a little bit sooner than I did.  

Unlike the Tax Game, this is not quite as much fun.  And it doesn't come with a refund, either.

SA

15 comments:

trek said...

Would that be chocolate cake with chocolate frosting or would you prefer one with some sort of pudding or fruity surprise in the middle?

Beth said...

We need to start a support group. Procrastination is my middle name. I'd rather be on top of everything, but it just doesn't happen that way. Today I made a bunch of doctors appointments I've been putting off and felt like I had really accomplished something. :)

Mel said...

I just finished mine this afternoon, and then hit the send button. Tradition is out the window when it comes to my taxes, because I used to be one of those good and timely filers who had them done and the refund spent by early March at the very latest. I did, however, sign on for VUBOQ's 10% challenge, and a bit over 10% of my refund has already been sent on its way to an assortment of charitable endeavours.

Oh, and you should make sure you specify dreamy fireman with that chocolate cake.

Emma said...

Ooh, good luck with Tax Roulette. It sounds very exciting. My taxes aren't done either, but I don't have a big refund waiting for me. We're hoping to just break even this year.

Ronni said...

I'm in the same boat tax return wise. My father would be so annoyed with me.

And thank you for the healing belly laugh when I got to "as God is my witness, they were actually taking notes" which I really needed.

I agree about making sure they note down "dreamy" as well.

kmkat said...

LOL! (The other accountants are wondering what I am chortling at, over here in my corner of Cubeland.) As I was reading about your game of tax roulette and how you are waiting to hit the Send button I was thinking, Yeah, I hope she doesn't wait until the evening of April 15 'cuz the servers may be overloaded and they'll crash and her return will bounce.

So, don't wait that long, 'kay? This is the voice of experience over here. It would probably not be in your best interests for me to let you in on the secrets of extensions, huh?

zippiknits said...

You are a brave little daredevil aren't you? I hope that the IRS never gets an extra penny out of you so don't wait 'til the last second.... The feds really don't need any extra money to waste on things other than education, which they seem to do a lot.

And, another word in for dreamy fireman...

Mia said...

Oh yay.. a refund ya say? Hmmmm.. wonder what new toys a Sheep might be gifting herself with in the near future *grin*. Pay off bills you say? Nah.. that's for sissies!

Donna Lee said...

Today is the tax day for me. I think. I may change my mind. It does only take an hour but I just haven't felt like it. Not at all. Our state one is free to file but I have to pay for the Fed. Somehow it seems unfair to have to pay for something like a tax form. They should be giving me something, cookies would be good.

Alwen said...

I finally did them myself yesterday (and pushed the Send button). Good thing, too, as the twin earaches are worse today, and I don't know if I'd have the concentration!

Cursing Mama said...

I just checked my online banking & the refund I am expecting for the returns I mailed on april 1st has not yet arrived. So, you'll have to settle for a link to a photo of what could possibly satisfy your fireman & chocolate cake fantasy.

http://16candlescakes.com/cakes/fireman.jpg
I hope that works

Karen said...

I can't believe you are playing fast and loose with the IRS;) My taxes are done, filed and the refund earmarked for house painting. Be careful.

Army_Wifey08 said...

I learned that HR Block is actaully amazing when it comes to taxes. they'll put your federal on a little credit card, and it's really quite nice. BTW. I left a post for you on my blog. I wont update until you see.


It's mandatory.

April said...

I like to play the Vehicle Registration game myself. In California they don't usually start pulling you over until it's six months expired. At least that's what Officer Morton told me. I lost this year. :(

knitseashore said...

Coconut, and I'd negotiate at least a week's vacation with no work contact before taking a few steps back off the roof.

Um, Sheepie, please don't tempt fate too much. The truck might demand some of that refund; it seems too well behaved lately.