Monday, April 07, 2008

Monday Cookies

That's right.  You heard me.  I'm eating cookies.  On a Monday.  And I defy you to try and stop me.  I will bite you.  I'm not kidding.  Even the Big, Fluffy Kitty is keeping clear of me right now.

Most people who know me, know that I am pretty good about the diet during the week.  Rigid, actually.  But, tonight, we are making an exception.  Cookies are not only advisable, but mandatory.  

I returned to school today after gifting myself with a lovely three day weekend.  I had to clean up the emotional mess and hurt feelings left in the wake of my substitute who clearly has little to no idea how best to approach kids who are maybe a little bit more "temperamental" than the average John, Jimmy or Susie.  Ruffled feathers were smoothed and I have promised my Not As Cheerful As They Used To Was Teaching Assistants to never, ever again leave the building.  Or go to the bathroom.  Or die.  

If nothing else, I figured the kids would be glad to see me after my day's absence.  Maybe throw me a parade or carry me around on their shoulders while they sang songs of praise and read aloud from the lengthy apologies they had written because they have not really appreciated my kind nature over the course of this year.  

Not so.  Very much not so.  In fact, it was the opposite of so.  There was nothing in the way of appreciation and the only songs came from the earbuds jammed into their noggins while they ignored any directions I might have with regard to their education and listened to their crazy rock 'n roll music.  And then they misbehaved in a way that could not be mistaken for anything other than a punishment for my having abandoned them.  

After recovering from all the student appreciation, I had a late meeting with the director who covers the upper grades and who will be the boss of me next year when I transfer to the middle school.  She felt that it was important that she be honest with me about the program I will be inheriting and the reasons why a "seasoned veteran" is needed over there.  Ten minutes into the discussion, my stomach hurt and I was giving serious thought to marrying for money sometime over the summer.  But, having taken steps to ensure that I will be financially secure, I was rather cheered by the fact that I would only have to do this four days per week as a part time teacher.  Even a nightmare is bearable if you get a three day weekend.

Not so.  Very much not so.  The opposite...  I have been consigned to hell and it is a full time placement.  I am trying to find some comfort in the fact that I am needed.  Trying.  Trying very hard.  

Now I am home and doing my taxes.  Or I was.  But I stopped doing my taxes because I need some information from last year's return and that is on the old computer.  And no, I did not print out my return from last year.  My printer is a little wonky.  Printing is for special occasions and really good knitting patterns.  Or pictures of firemen.  I like firemen.  I anticipate that it will be a fireman who talks me down from my roof later this week.  

So, I'm eating cookies on a Monday.  Or I was.  I finished the last one while I was typing this.  If you need me, I'll be hanging out of the kitchen cupboards in search of that bag of chocolate chips I know is lurking in there somewhere.



Mia said...

Oh sheepie.. come on over and I'll bake ya a fresh batch. Sounds like you got some seriously crappy karma goin' on right now. I'm crossin' my fingers for the better kind. Quick!

But even in the worst of times, you'll always have your sense of humor. That first paragraph cracked me up :)

trek said...

You want to know something, I was just lamenting the lack of cookies here, too. Somehow, this is just a cookie Monday all around.

Maybe I can convince Number Guy to make a cookie run.

Or I'll just pull out a bowl of cereal. Oh, wait, do we have enough milk for me to have cereal tonight? Will we run short in the morning when Neatnik needs her healthy breakfast?

I wonder if I can talk Number Guy into going to the store for cookies...

One day at a time, Sheepie.

Jacqui said...

i followed my supper with a hot fudge sundae (vanilla ice cream, hot fudge, walnuts and dried blueberries).

then i read your blog and, frankly, you inspired me...

so i brewed up some coffee and dipped me some gingersnaps.

damn you, woman, for identifying my craving! or at least, for identifying it after the ice cream. :)

just remember: door closing, window opening... door closing, window opening!!!

Beth said...

I'm sorry you had such a bad day and that the future doesn't look very exciting. I hope you find your chocolate chips - they're good for times like this.

Kath said...

I'm guessing that "seasoned veteran" was meant to be a compliment? But really, if you are just doin' cookies you are doing well. I'da grabbed a bottle of wine to go with the cookies and crawled into bed!

Things do get better, sometimes they take longer than we want them to, but they do get better.

kmkat said...

I hear ya, Sheepie. One day last week my dinner was a bag of peanut M&Ms and half a cookie. Sometimes that is exactly what one needs.

They will pay you for your all full 5-day weeks next year, won't they? So the sacrifice will be confined to you sanity and your psyche and not spread to the bank account? Because if the latter happened I don't think you could be held responsible for the consequences.

knitseashore said...

Monday is definitely a cookie day. And from what you describe, cake or pie would definitely be understandable as well.

I hope things look better soon. Or that a Dunkin Donuts or your favorite place (Mrs. Field's?) opens an emergency walk-through on the school campus for you.

EGunn said...

Ugh. We all have those teaching days. I, too, am the winner of bad assignments because I'm "good" at what I do. But somehow, after whining for a moment, you grit your teeth, and do it anyway. And the world is better for it. It's probably worth it in the long run. Especially if there are occasional Monday night cookies to make up for the extra pain. =)
Here's hoping that things aren't really as bad as they seem tonight!

zippiknits said...

That HAS to be the very best eat the cookie reasoning ever written. I totally bought it.

Seasoned veterans are what it takes sometimes because they bring armored vehicles to class in Middle School. You do know that, right?

Julie said...

Some days you just gotta have the cookies!

Anonymous said...

My dear Sheep, from many unexpected things comes some small grain of goodness. Remember that this allows you to buy more yarn, and allows the pension check to be a couple of pennies larger at the time you retire. Living large on a state pension, just think about that!!! The world will envy your $85.02 monthly income. Don't you have a vacation soon?
Have a good one, and will see you soon.
Love ya,

Donna Lee said...

I'm glad to know that I am not the only one who is still doing her taxes. We had no cookies last night either. Some ungrateful daughter ate my cookies and left me crumbs. I needed them, really needed them last night.

MathIsBeauty said...

Oh Sheep, I had my old computer EAT my old return and had to get a transcript from the IRS to do my current taxes (not done yet either) so I sympathize. I just saw a recipe for chocolate peanut-butter cookies that use cake mix and I didn't have ANY of the ingredients. Maybe tonight.

Cursing Mama said...

I googled rich single firefighters for you Sheepie, and only came up with a firefighter bachelor auction. A smart person might begin investing in black & white cookie manufacturing.

Anonymous said...

I've been a lurker for a while, but needed to de-lurk when I saw this. I teach high school, and I understand. Right now I am living in fear that the school I work for will decide that I should teach reseat biology next year (for kids who have failed at least once). It is also a "challenging" program. Should I get that assignment, I too will be breaking out the cookies, and chocolate chips, and buying some nice yarn . . .

Hang in, and good luck!

Future Mrs. D said...

You need to check out Sam's blog. I wish firemen around here looked like that....damn.