Sunday, July 08, 2007

When Good Pickles Go Bad

I had rather high hopes for showing off a nice FO today. But, I'm not quite there yet. Be patient with me. Perhaps tonight I can finish up that toe and graft those stitches for ya! Instead, how about I do a little public service announcement for business owners?

Now, in the interest of not being sued or having rotten fruit thrown at me in the streets for putting stuff in print, let's go hypothetical on this one. Say you own a business. For the sake of this discussion, lets call it a pickle factory. You went into the pickle business with all good intentions. You were probably all youthful and starry-eyed at the time. You just knew that you could change the world one pickle at a time. You decided that your pickle factory should be a non-profit pickle factory and should specialize in helping families with making better pickles in their own homes. You offered supervision of the pickling process as well as pickling courses. State agencies could refer families who need assistance to your factory and trained pickle professionals could be sent to assist them in making a better pickle. Your pickle business was just thriving. In light of this pickle-related success, you made the decision to open a satellite office in the southern part of the state. You may not be as invested in that branch of the factory being as it is further away. But, what the heck. You've expanded your empire and, if they don't get quite as many of the perks down there, then that's just the way it is. You are the boss of the pickle factory and a respected member of the pickle making community.

Now, let's fast forward a few years. This non-profit pickle business (we could even call it an agency at this point) is struggling a bit. State contracts have migrated to bigger pickle providers and families aren't able to be referred as easily. There are some who might suggest that the accounting going on at this point was not exactly stellar...but no one would say it out loud because that would be dangerous. As would saying that it might have been a good idea to explore some of the fifty million new programs that your staff suggested as other sources of revenue. Suffice it to say, your pickle business is doing badly. After limping along for a few years, sticking to your original pickle vision and continuing to steadfastly do business the way you did it back in the early pickle making days, you make the decision to close the satellite office in the southern portion of the state.

Now, here's the part where I offer a little suggestion. If you haven't already done so, it would be a nice touch to include in the envelope that contains your former employees' final checks a little acknowledgement. Not that the $37.49 isn't a fine reward for a job well done and all. I'm sure that this will be much appreciated. But, given the circumstances and the fact that there has been nothing in the way of a pat on the shoulder since the decision was made to close this "pickle factory," a thanks-for-all-your-hard-work-and-sorry-about-closing-the-factory note would be a nice gesture.

It's just a thought, really. Do with it what you will. I'm sure, though, that you are not the types of people who run doomed pickle factories. Maybe you could forward this to someone who is currently in the process of shutting down pickle production.

Meanwhile, I (purely coincidentally, mind you) find myself in possession of a check for thirty seven dollars and change. And a little extra time on my hands now that I don't have two jobs anymore. (again, that is a coincidence and has nothing to do with the previous pickle proverb) Also in the clump of envelopes that represent the mail I forgot to pick up for two days was a second check for my having attended a summer teacher training! Woot! Woot! This not only covered the cost of the camera upgrade, but left a wee bit left over for playing.

And so it was that The Sheep found herself wandering about her local JoAnn's craft store after a delightful lunch with Mommy, Daddy, Baby Brother and Future SIL Sheep. Frankly, I needed to walk around a bit. There was a disturbing amount of pie at this shindig. If you feel the earth shaking at any point, it's not some sort of seismic event. It's just me waddling about and taking my pie thighs for a stroll.

There wasn't a heck of a lot in the store. It was rather depleted, in fact. Dunno if this is a renovation situation or if the whole place is going away. But I persevered and found some cotton on sale that might like to become dishcloths. I also stocked up on a few of the circulars in the sizes that I always need but can never seem to find. And, somehow, a copy of Vogue Quick Knits ended up in the basket. I must have blacked out or something...but I had the extra checks this week so all is well and I can knit something Quickly without guilt.

I also found this little cutie:




Honest...it just followed me home.
It's not quite the same quality as my Lantern Moon sheep tape measure, but when your handle is "The Sheep," you can't pass up a novelty measuring device such as this. Particularly if it's also on clearance...
So with my Not-Pickle-Severance-Money well spent and a belly full of pie, I bid you good evening. I will knit like the wind and see if I can't have some socks to show for my efforts tomorrow. I really need to finish something soon here! The Index Cards Of Summer Organization that I am using to keep myself on track indicate that I am well behind schedule at this point.
You could say I'm in something of a pickle...
SA

14 comments:

sheep#100 said...

As Twinkle from the Higglytown Heroes would say, "Aw, pickles!"

Future SIL said...

Just so everyone knows.....the "tater" salad was perfect. Couldn't have asked for anything better.

Teri S. said...

I hate it when pickle factories have to close their southern auxiliary offices. Is there any chance that an enterprising Sheep can take advantage of some pickle diversification herself? I hope the closure isn't going to put you more in a pickle.

Mel said...

So are you going to be bringing tater salad to the yarn shop Tuesday night? Seeing as how it got an official endorsement, and all.

Anonymous said...

So howzabout sharing your famed pickl--, er, tater salad recipe? Being as how it is so highly acclaimed and all...

Carrie K said...

I second the sharing of recipes and that the Not Pickle closing doesn't put you into a pickle.

That sheep measuring tape is adorable.

catsmum said...

Hey, Sheepie, guess what?
I got your new grey sheepTM's white sister on Friday, when Maz and Chris came up to visit.
Coinkydink huh?
I was going to Blog about her last night but the sick kitty business got in the way.
You know what this means, don't you?
I now have three sheep TMs ... a black and a cream Lantern Moon plus the new one... and three of anything is a COLLECTION.

Anonymous said...

No surprises there, Sheepie; that's just the way the Pickle Factories work. After all, employees aren't really people, you know.

One of those black sheep followed me home from Joanne's recently, too :-)

Anonymous said...

Yum! Pie! But not pickle pie.
Karen
http://nothingbutknit.blog-city.com/

The Kelly Green Rogue said...

Isn't it amazing how many people underestimate what a pat on the back and an "atta boy" will accomplish in the category of goodwill and peace on earth? Glad to see your not-pickle money well spent :)

April said...

I think pickles are gross. I would probably die if the only thing remaining on this earth were pickles.

Anonymous said...

The pickle people aren't thinking straight. Oops, that story wasn't about you. :) I'm sure the work you did at your not-pickle job was very much appreciated by the people you helped.

5elementknitr said...

Oh Sheepie, poor Sheepie! There loss is your yarn gain....

Unknown said...

LOL! Pie Thighs! I'm so stealing that!