Witness Protection Program For Socks

Don't even talk to me about Monkey Socks. They are stupid. I hate them. Stupid, stupid Monkeys. I don't care what anyone says...they are nowhere near us on the genetic spectrum. Hate those Monkeys. They are in time-out.

That's not true. It's not the Monkey's fault. They did their best to please me. They gave me lots of helpful reminders regarding where and when to begin the pattern repeats. Like, for examples, miles of stockinette that represent the bottom of the foot part. All that stockinette is a hint of rather impressive proportions. Apparently, I am incapable of heeding those hints and, as a result, have to tink back yet again to reach a point where the foot of my Monkey Socks are unsullied. They aren't really in time-out. It's more like "protective custody." This particular program is not quite as all-encompassing as that of the federal government or anything. It's more like I hid them in the bottom of the knitting basket and stuck my tongue out at them for a full twenty minutes. But they are safe from me for the time being.

I opted to work on the nice, simple Socks Of Summer for a while. Their bland, boring and yet oh-so-soothing plainness is pretty much what I'm capable of right now. Once I have written out the words, "I will not knit the bottom of my sock in any sort of pattern even if it seems like the right thing to do at the time" 1000 times, then I might feel safe going back to the stupid Monkeys.

So, what else does a Sheep do to fill the hours once she has removed an offending Monkey from her line of vision? Well, she does something else that she doesn't actually love all that much: she breaks out the hand cards. Again, I tell a falsehood. I don't actually hate hand carding wool. I just sort of like the idea of hand carding more than the actual task. I can ponder hand carding for longer periods than I can perform it. Which is why this rather manageable amount of Shetland has taken me three weeks to get to this point:

Hey...at least you can't see a Monkey anywhere.

I probably could have drum carded this wool fairly easily. But, for some reason, it seemed to want to be done by hand. No regrets, really. I think it's the right choice. And it's not like I was going to be spinning it tomorrow or anything. I'll just keep plugging away at it in fits and starts and it'll get done. This is part of the fiber bonanza that came to me from Cathy and it deserves to be done right, dontcha think?

And I'm unclear on whether or not there is a any sort of program designed to keep nice, unspun fiber safe from these hands...best to work at a steady pace and not take any chances.

SA