Thursday, January 25, 2007

Nooooooooooooooo!!!

It's been one of those weeks. Not the good kind. The kind that is full of angst and stuff. The kind that makes you wonder if perhaps there is a hidden camera somewhere and that you will be featured on some sort of survival program. "The Endangered, Grumpy Sheep of New England" perhaps.

The coffee maker died on Sunday night. I lived with instant for four straight days. People could tell. There were comments. Fortunately, the situation is now resolved and there will be coffee flowing thick and dark through the veins of this Sheep tomorrow morning. Thanks to all for your suggestions and commiseration. And I'm giving a big shout out to Mel for his offer of his spare machine! Had I read my email sooner, I would have taken you up on that one, dude! That was unbelievably thoughtful. Knitters are the best kind of people no matter what the mean guy in my class might say. I'll bet no one has ever offered him a coffee maker...

Speaking of the AntiKnitter, I ended up taking the high road and not bringing my needles to his class today. I figured that this could maybe backfire on me should a random principal or superintendent of schools wander by to see if we were all hard at work teaching the masses. But I thought mean thoughts about him the whole time and made no eye contact whatsoever. The fact that he did not appear to notice this does not necessarily mean I was ineffective in my message-sending. I'm sure that, deep down, he was terribly contrite.

I need to believe this. It's been a bad week. Let me have this one thing, 'kay?

Frankly, it's been the kind of week where you just want to run away and join the circus. But I can't. I've been tagged and numbered. I'm no longer able to just disappear into the mists and become a hermit in the hills. The school pictures have come back to haunt me. If you were a reader back in September, then you will recall the school picture debacle. Instead of the usual skimpy freebie package that the picture company sends along with our mandatory school ID badges, we received about two thousand school portraits. I began sending them hither and thither to anyone who had ever mailed me anything. Bloggers stopped having contests for fear of my Sheepie visage showing up in their mailboxes. My family received multiple copies in various sizes and there were a few black and white "artsy" shots thrown in for good measure. Poor Mommy and Daddy Sheep had to feign the happy when they received a 2007 calendar with my face smack in the middle.

And I still have some left over. It's like a curse. And it is not finished with me.

Today in my staff mailbox I found two cards. Both have my picture on them and my name, Ms. Sheep, clearly imprinted at the top. It seems that, along with all the students who had their photos taken at school, I have been registered with a ChildFind service. Should I ever attempt to cast off the shackles of my day to day existence and go run with the radishes, all Mommy and Daddy Sheep have to do is call the phone number, give out the identifying information and my face will be posted all over them internets. It will only be a matter of days before I am dragged back, kicking and screaming, to my job, life and credit card debt.

Like I said...it has not been a good week.

SA

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh my, do you mean we may see your picture on an Amber Alert?

Mel said...

That just sounds double plus unfun. On the other hand, if you do decide to go on the "lamb" (I couldn't resist) and need to lay low for a while, you know where there's a coffee maker itching to be used.

sheep#100 said...

Hey, Sheepie - I've got a spare futon. It's in the basement and you can hide out there. I won't turn you in.

sheep#100 said...

I'll even treat you to non-frozen pizza from a real local pizzeria.

Anonymous said...

I am certainly relieved to know that if you are ever lost, we'll be able to find you. I can sleep easier tonight. :)

catsmum said...

yet another reason to emmigrate. Robyn and Rosie said to tell you they'd love to have a sheep in their herd and if anyone came looking for you, they'd hide with you in the goat house. no one in here but us goats. maaaaaaaaaaa

Anonymous said...

What are we going to do? The plan was in the making. You were going to deal with that antiknitter and then the Knitters Relocation Service was going to set you up in a nice new community with many yarn shops and knitters. This won't work if someone is going to be placing your face on the sides of milk cartons everywhere. Never mind.
Karen
http://nothingbutknit.blog-city.com/

B. said...

Perhaps I can start up an underground system to smuggle you to safety here in Canada. It's very quiet where we are. There is a wolf hanging around, but he does look well fed so we sha'nt worry about that one!

If I could start a knitters' underground system, perhaps the name of your documentary could be something like "Fight or flight: What happens when knitting sheep band together" or, even better, "When sheep pull the fleece over your eyes...they flee to Canada". Okay, okay, not great...I'll be working on it though.

Hang in there Sheepie...and enjoy your java today!

Anonymous said...

What is life coming to, when, after a bad week, you are not even allowed to hide for a while so nobody can find you? Why are the antiknitters not put on milk cartons or coffee cans/envelopes to warn people away from them??

Thank you so much for your sweet comments on Charlie. I'm happy to say he seems to be doing better now, and is *finally* eating again. I'll get over the smell of canned fish first thing in the morning, eventually! :)

Mia said...

sorry sheepie.. it sounds like it's a good night for chinese takeout, a good movie, and in my case, about thirty thousand cocktails.

and at least you've got coffee now. there's always that.

Anonymous said...

Oooh, no fun! Maybe you could just hibernate at home for awhile. Curled up on the couch with the kitties sounds pretty nice to me. :)

Bells said...

Is Australia far enough way for you? You can hide here. And hey, can we swap? I'll come to America because I feel like joining the circus too. Hang in there.

Anonymous said...

Here's a big Sheepy huggggggggggg coming your way, sounds like you are in need of some stress relief.

Hope this week is lots better.

Take care Annie,

Geraldine