Wednesday, March 12, 2008

When You Don't Have It In You To Be Coherent...

You do The Wednesday Night Bullet Post!  Here's your bullet points for this week:


*Noolie thinks I should do up a button for the WNBP.  Any thoughts on that?

*Last weekend, in the projected forecast, I was promised a storm-free week.  Promised.  I am still on prescription cough medication, but I still roused myself from the codeine-induced stupor long enough to do a little, lopsided sort of jig.

*It snowed pretty much all day today.  

*No accumulation, though.  And it's over now.  But, I still consider this a breach of promise and am consulting an attorney.  They can say they changed the forecast.  But, that will have no effect on a jury of my peers.  Especially if they are all from around here because my informal polls indicate that we are all sick of the white stuff.

*Sometimes and for a variety of reasons, a student on my caseload will require a change of program and will have to spend more time in my classroom than other kids.  Sometimes the definition of "more time" is something along the lines of:  Endless, mind-numbing hours during which I will be subjected to repeated pleas to be released back into the wild and non-stop promises to never again do whatever it was that got them sentenced to my tender, loving care in the first place.

*Which probably accounts for my having heard one student say to my latest full-time guest, "Dude...you gotta be careful.  You and Ms. Sheep are actually starting to look alike!"

*Neither I nor my little inmate found that particularly flattering.  

*Does anyone out there happen to speak BFKish?  I really need someone to translate the following for the Big, Fluffy Kitty:  

My going into the kitchen does not mean that you are getting a treat.  Sometimes it's just that I realized I left the faucet running.  Or I need a treat for myself.  It's not all about you.  Stop looking at me like that!!!!  I am most certainly not starving you to death, you ingrate!  You just had a treat ten minutes ago!  Why, oh why did I ever buy those stupid Greenies in the first place?????  You put that phone down right this minute!  No one is going to believe that you are being denied sustenance!!!  

*Let me know if you can help me on this one.

*Today a student asked if I could make him a paper airplane.  I needed to get some paper to do this.  When I turned around with the paper in hand, I almost stepped on the three kids who were following me, eagerly awaiting the opportunity to watch me magically turn paper into aircraft.  I almost squished them and I'm not insured for that.  Frustrated, I cried out, "Good Lord!  You guys are worse than my cat!!!"

*My Cheerful Teaching Assistant, grinning broadly, said, "Maybe you should give them a Greenie?"

*I am close to finishing up the second of the Trek-king socks.  They don't exactly match.  But, I can live with that.

*I need some socks.  The weather people are liars and no one can count on Spring ever coming for real.  I'll probably be shoveling a path to the truck in July.  Socks will be needed lest I freeze to death at the Independence Day cook-out.



That's it.  That's all I've got.  It's the middle of the week, my students and I are starting to morph into twin-type beings and the Big, Fluffy Kitty is still standing in the kitchen staring at the treat bag and wondering if she should call in the authorities to discuss my denying her regular feedings at thirty second intervals.  Not much has changed.  I hope all is well in your version of mid-week and that your Thursday brings with it the promise of clear skies and green grass.  

Or new socks.  

SA

19 comments:

sheep#100 said...

Don't worry - until the polydactyl cat actually develops the opposable thumbs and becomes literate, you need not worry!

Of course, you are working on the literacy path with the inmates so you might have a little worry there. But don't tell HM - you know how she gets.

Kris said...

Sorry to be of no help on translating for BFK...

But, spring is nearly here. Just another couple of weeks.

PICAdrienne said...

If anyone manages to translate into BFK, would you please post it, or forward it to me. We have the same issue, and we also have four flavors of Greenies. It could be a conspiracy. (I have some Trekking, but his attitude pre-dates the Trekking.)

Mel said...

Oh please. BFK understands you perfectly well. She just chooses not to accept. We find that clapping of hands and making loud "pfft! pfft!" sounds (with our mouths, as I know there are juvenile minds reading this) works well to get the point across.

Anonymous said...

I'm a lawyer. I'll be happy to represent you.
Do you, perchance, know any psychiatrists who could prescribe something for the schizophrenic weather we've been having? (well, at least we're not bored... just ... well... frightened, since we never know what we're going to get -- our weather reporters have no hope of predicting anything)

Anonymous said...

Obviously Kris isn't from around here; we generally skip right from winter into summer and that doesn't happen until much, much later :)

I'm guessing Mel's idea would work fairly well with BFK (especially if you make those noises come from some place other than your mouth - yes, I'm the juvenile mind he was speaking of).

Anonymous said...

p.s. Just because I didn't do a WNBP this week, doesn't mean I don't still want an official button. I have a headache this week and can't come up with anything worth posting.

Anonymous said...

Poor BFK. He (she?) could commiserate with my dogs. They are pretty sure they haven't been outside since November, nor been fed since last Wednesday.

mehitabel said...

You can't have spring, it got lost this year. We are having high summer out here on the Left Coast. It's 85 freakin' degrees, which just adds to the misery induced by that nasty DST.
BFK knows what she wants, and knows how to guilt you into giving it to her. Smart BFK!

Anonymous said...

I think a button is a good idea! WNBPs are great.

Knitting Linguist said...

Well, we have no snow, which I realize is a fairly obnoxious thing to say here. However, on the cat front, I can tell you that I have one cat who believes that the best thing in the world to do at 2:30 in the morning is to climb up onto my face and lie there, purring madly, until the urge to bite my nose overtakes him, after which he runs away. Greenies have *got* to be a better option.

Kath said...

I'm not touching the whole weather issue, considering where I live you'd probably reach through the internets and smack me.

But I am pleased to see that BFK is doing such an excellent job of training you. The kitties do try so hard to get the stupid humans to understand how to properly serve their masters.

catsmum said...

Oakley being a rather BFK himself did offer to translate but then discovered that he couldn't read your typing. I did offer to read it to him but he got huffy and wandered off.

Anonymous said...

A button, yes, you need a button!

Teri S. said...

Yes to the WNBP button! I'm pretty much useless as a graphics artist, though. I have no idea how to disabuse BFK of the notion that she gets treats everytime you go into the kitchen. We have the same problem with Emma. We mostly ignore her pleadings (poor starving kitty). Tom usually caves, though, just to make her stop meowing.

Cathy said...

We got our cat a couple of kittens to take her mind off food. Then we got a kitten for the younger 2 cats. Now we are out numbered in the kitchen.

Don't fall for any offers of a new kitten to take BFK's mind off food. Get her a free choice treat dispenser. It will be easier and cheaper in the long run.

Geraldine said...

Send the snow this way Sheep, we are missing it something fierce, strange but true....go figure.

As for Fluffy Kitty, Mr. C and Ms. M are wondering, 'what's the problem' of course it's a good idea to trip humans in the kitchen until they cough up (no pun intended) the required number of treats.

Huggs, G

debsnm said...

THERE'S your problem! She can see the bag. Put it away (preferably high up) and distract her with her favorite turtle. And don't worry about the twin-ship thing, we (adults) all look alike to 11-yos.

April said...

Did you hear that rumor that zombies LOVE Greenies?