Thursday, March 13, 2008

Hello? Is This Thing On?

Sometime around the mid-way point in the day, my Cheerful Teaching Assistant suddenly perked up.  I could tell that she was all a-tingle with the joy of discovery.  She was the most alert looking person in the room.  The only one really awake, if you want the truth.  Two weeks of Maine Educational Assessments and the joy that is Daylight Savings Time have taken their toll.   If I weren't so utterly terrified of the imminent invasion of the walking dead, I'd say we looked like zombies.  

But, I won't say that because we weren't looking so good at that point.  I don't want to offend our future Zombie Overlords.

Where was I?  Oh, that's right.  The Cheerful Teaching Assistant.  Having reached some sort of epiphany, she was too excited to keep it to herself.  She was fair to bustin' with the need to let us know what she'd figured out.  She leaped from her chair and cried:

Ohmigod!!!  I know why I've been oversleeping and late to work all week!  And why my hair looks like this!  We set the clocks ahead this past weekend!  I've been getting up at the "old" time!  Can you believe it?  That's what it is, all right!

She sat down with an expectant sort of look on her face, just waiting for the room to erupt in applause or for us to at least all make some sort of "oh, now I see" kinds of noises.  I was too stunned to speak.

I have been complaining in one form or another about this very phenomenon for four days straight.  I have, in the most literal sense, whined non-stop about having to leave for work in the dark and how I don't know what time it is anymore.  I have blamed any and all government agencies for this clock-busting rule and even spent an hour of my life that I will never get back explaining how I spent a different hour of my life that I'll never get back trying to reset the clock in my truck.

How did she miss that?  How did anyone miss that?  People I see only in passing once every blue moon know about my feelings on this matter and what it is doing to my life.  My staff are with me all the time, for hours at a stretch.  This is inconceivable!

I think it is time to accept it.  They are starting to tune me out.  I have gone on and on.  And on.  And then on some more.  At some point, and I'm guessing it was several months ago, the "mute" button was pressed.  I am a big, talking head.  My mouth moves and only when it looks like I might be saying something teacherly and job related does anything register.  After hours and hours of listening to me blather on about my shoes, my thoughts on oranges and whether or not that weird mole on my neck is actually an infected spider bite, they've all taken to higher and quieter ground.

Which is a problem since I really wanted some input on that spider bite situation.  I heard about some girl who got bitten by a spider and it laid eggs in her nose and they hatched while she was at the prom.  And then she went insane.  

You can see where "tuning out" might become something of a self-defense mechanism for those in my world...

To salve my wounded ego and to celebrate the fact that time no longer has meaning, I have declared tonight, "Waffles For Dinner" night and whipped up a nice batch of crispy, waffly goodness in the Cinderella waffle iron.  I gave the Big, Fluffy Kitty a few extra treats for being such a good listener and will spend the remainder of the evening spinning the pretty Shetland/silk blend that I started last weekend.  This is good.  

And tomorrow, I plan to tell everyone alllllll about it.

SA

18 comments:

trek said...

How were the waff-ooz? Did the BFK dance to the I Love Waff-Ooz song - or is she tuning it out?

Beth said...

Maybe your CTA was just a bit numb from the time change and things weren't registering when you spoke. I think you should test out your theory tomorrow by saying something really wild and crazy to see if anyone listens.

MathIsBeauty said...

I think your really need cake waff-ooz and maybe ice-cream to salve your wounded ego.

kmkat said...

I had a spider bite last summer. My arm nearly fell off. No prom problems, though, mainly because I'm way past prom-age.

mehitabel said...

I've had infected spider-bites and trust me on this one, you would know if it was a spider bite. You would KNOW!!! I cannot imagine how any human being would not know that we are on DST now--that D stands for damned, demented, deleterious, despondent, depressing, and every other nasty d-word we can come up with. Damned Summer Time, yeah, that's it... Fortunately tomorrow is Friday and you will have a weekend to recover.

Kath said...

Yeah, I'd totally go with the cakewaffles. I've been craving those since the first time I read about them on Ravelry. I may have to buy that Hello Kitty waffle maker on sale at Target.

And yes, I've always been particularly fond of people who suddenly pop up and ask me a question about five minutes after I gave the answer. (Nice to see you were paying attention, thank you ever so much.)

kmkat said...

Oh, and I just tagged you for a silly meme. Check it out on Friday.

catsmum said...

cake waffles??
How did that one pass me by?

someone please tell me about the wonderfullness of cake waffooz before I wither up and blow away

Karen said...

Waffles cure anything!

Donna Lee said...

I read a blog where they celebrated DST. Yes, actually got up early and celebrated. I questioned their sanity and the appropriateness of their being allowed to mingle with the rest of us. I have been "off" all week. I blame the change in time. Dinner has been later than usual because it didn't look dark enough to be cooking dinner.

Deb said...

Go ahead and tell them all about it - but apparently - they won't be listening to you.

Yarnhog said...

You're not alone. I think every parent in the world can relate. Last night my husband called the kids in for dinner. They both shouted, "Okay!" When no one arrived in a reasonable time, he went back out and reminded them that it was time for dinner. They both looked at him blankly and said, "It is?" He got a little exasperated and pointed out that they had acknowledged him the first time. "Oh," Older Son replied, "I only said 'okay' because I wasn't listening." This explains a lot.

Alwen said...

I just saw a contest with a drawing for a SpongeBob waffle maker and thought of you!

April said...

Did you say something, Sheepie?

Cursing Mama said...

I soo want a cinderlla waffle maker. Tonight would be a fantastic night for waffles....

Carrie K said...

Cake waffles? Where have I been? (Working).

It's not that she hasn't heard you all week. It's that she's on DST now and the mind numbing horror of it isn't allowing rational thought. Eventually we overcome it. So they change it back.

Evil Zombie Overlords are already in charge. For decades.

knitseashore said...

The fact that your assistant is 1)cheerful despite 2)having her sleep schedule off can mean only one thing 3)she must be part of the zombies that are slowly taking over. I'd be really careful, especially if you are still arriving at school in the morning in the dark...

Becka - The Knitting Wounded said...

The CTA is lucky she's not my CTA; I'm the violent type...

Waffles for Dinner is the bestest! The HusBoy makes these Oatmeal waffles that are just to stumble and moan for brains for.