Hits And Near Misses.

I commute about forty minutes or so each morning. I can do it in thirty if the traffic is light. (which it generally is at too-early thirty which is when I'm out and about...) The towns I travel through after leaving the Maine Turnpike are of the "quaint" variety. By the standards of the rest of this great country, most places in Maine are actually small and cute. But these are hamlets that even we consider to be petite. So you can imagine the hub-bub that is created by the construction of anything that resembles "big city" in these towns. A mall would probably be enough to cause mass fainting and hyperventilation. But even a small chain-type donut place can be enough to make people a bit silly. And this is just what happened in the town next to my school.

First there was the discussion of the soon-to-be donut place. Then there was the digging of the hole. That attracted the attention of every little boy within a ten mile radius...it was something of a safety hazard for a while there for what little boy (and many girls) can resist the siren song of a large, yellow machine digging a gi-normous hole? Then, after many months of anticipation, there was the actual, honest-to-goodness opening of the donut place. I can only assume that the excitement over this event finally coming to pass was what caused the marked lack of oxygen to the brain on the part of the gentleman who tried to kill me today.

He'd clearly gotten his donuts. This must have just been too much for him to deal with on an emotional level. I know this because he had somehow managed to pull his car out half-way into oncoming traffic. It was a pretty big bag of donuts. I know this because I got to see it. Up close and personal, you might say. As he was blocking the right lane, I was forced to drive in the left. No big deal, really. I was planning on taking a left shortly anyway. But, Mr. Donut must have also been late to work because, not five feet from me, he shot out. And stopped. Traffic going the other way was not conducive to continuing. I was left with few choices at that point.

I slammed on the brakes. As I approached his vehicle, I got to see his donuts and hoped that he felt they were worth being the last thing he was ever going to see on this earth. Realizing that braking wasn't going to be good enough, I took a hard right and narrowly missed his bumper by inches. Thankfully, the guy behind me was observant enough to realize my situation in the blink of an eye. He gave me the room I needed to borrow his part of the lane and maneuver. With great squealing of tires and widening of eyes, I was able to get around Mr. Donut. If this doesn't impress you, then know this: I was holding my coffee at the time. I did it with but one Sheepie hoof on the wheel and didn't spill a drop, thank you very much!

I still don't understand why the entire town didn't drop what they were doing and give me a rousing round of applause. They were probably all distracted with worry about whether the donuts were OK...

Yeah. It was a miss. And I'm rather grateful for that. The truck, clearly feeling chagrined over it's poor behavior over the last few months, rose to the occasion and made the maneuvers that the situation required of it.

Now let's talk about a hit, shall we? A good kind. The rambouillet that I am spinning as part of my Wooly Wonka exotic fiber club was dry when I arrived home and it is happily skeined.

OK...it is badly skeined. But it is still rather happy!

I have to admit that the whole time I was spinning it, I feared disaster. Were you in the vicinity of my humble home on any of the weekends that this was on the wheel you might have heard things like:

Dang it! There's another floofy part!

Wait...how did it get so much thinner?!!

That doesn't look right...

What was I thinking???? Joining a fiber club...I must be crazy! Me? Spinning the same exact wool that everyone else is spinning! Just what I need! My spinning up for comparison! Oh woe is this sad, sorry excuse for a Sheep!!!

But, you know what? After its final plying and dip in the warm waters...it ain't half bad!!! In fact, I think I did rather well with it. It is a bit finer than I was shooting for, but I think it will still work for the club pattern. The nubbly parts that looked so ungainly in the singles seemed to just blend in beautifully. The finished yarn is soft, springy and lighter than air! I don't know whether to knit with it or just snuggle it.

Or strap it to my bumper. It could cushion me in the event of further encounters with donut-distracted drivers.

SA