Ongoing MIsdirection

Sometimes it is really rather helpful to have a variety of strategies on hand to keep one's mind from focusing on things best left alone.  I am rather good at that sort of thing, having had years in which to practice.  I'm actually something of a master at it.

If, for example, you need to keep yourself from thinking too much about how The Stupid Lopsided Tam is going to look all stupid and lopsided, there are always the 80's to ponder.  Good times, the 80's.  The hair was big, the pants were pleated and there was no end to how you might rip up a perfectly good sweatshirt for the sake of fashion.  There was also 1985 and a little film gem known as The Return Of The Living Dead.  

What could be better?  Well...truth be told, lots of stuff could be better.  This isn't one of those movies to which I will turn when I need solid reference material during the coming Zombie Apocalypse.  Still, you can't help but appreciate it when the living dead have the wherewithal to radio in to dispatch for more cops and paramedics when they find themselves still feeling a bit peckish.  There is also something to be said for the film's willingness to graphically impart certain pearls of wisdom.  You really can't get enough of such life lessons as:  If Your Boyfriend Has No Pulse And No Heartbeat After Being Exposed To Zombie Gas Then It Is Probably A Rather Bad Idea To Lock Yourself In A Room With Him Because There Is Really No Hope For A Positive Outcome In This Sort Of Situation. 

I'm just sayin' is all....

Of course, sometimes this sort of distraction will prove a bit too much.  You might, for example, miss the second stitch whilst performing a K2tog maneuver and find that you have yet another gaping hole in that Stupid Lopsided Tam That Somehow Defied The Mathematical Odds And Actually Decreased Down To The Right Number Of Stitches.  You might need a distraction from the fact that you were very close to the finish line and now have to go back and find that stupid loop before all is lost forever.

Now you're in a pickle.  This requires the breaking out of the Big Guns.  This tam has been an ongoing source of frustration after all.  You need an expert for this sort of thing.  It is time to call forth that force of negativity known as Hysterical Mind and turn her loose on a variety of weather related websites and television channels.  She can easily kill two hours following the track of Hurricane (sort of) Kyle and determine whether or not it is time to be boarding up the windows and start doing a detailed inventory of the canned food.  The fact that we live in the southernmost part of the state and were not really in line for the brunt of it means nothing.  HM can find the worst in a potentially good situation with nothing but a few flood watches and a couple of wind gusts.  Of course, once the track of the storm changes dramatically enough that even Hysterical Mind has to admit that there is no reason for alarm, then you need to go back to the drawing board.

There's the ungodly humidity.  That is pretty distracting.  Or the eventual need to start tinking back on the tam and snagging that loose stitch.  Then there's the fact that you have a nasty cold which is not mixing well with that humidity nor with the rage that comes from wrestling uncooperative stitches.  That can lead to an impressive bout of overheating and the required soaking in a nice, cool tub for a bit.  All that can be very distracting when you need to change trains of thought.

But I think I might have something better.  There is something that will keep even the most focused of knitters/storm watchers/zombie aficionados from staying on task no matter how hard they might try.  It is so effective because it is so unexpected.  There was no indication that this was going to be a problem given that the parties involved had never once seen fit to dispute a certain item in the past.  

You see, up to now, only the Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty has shown any real interest in The Collapsible Cat Cave.  There was no reason to believe that there would be a problem when I brought home The Giant Connector Thingie That I Thought Was A Cat Tunnel.  I figured it would keep him occupied and allow the Big, Fluffy Kitty to roam about in peace.  I was wrong.  There have been any number of power struggles going on over here since yesterday afternoon.  Both cats seem to want The Giant Connector Thingie and neither wish to share.  

Trust me.  That is very, very distracting.  Alarming at times even...

SA