Weighty Matters

Oliver, my tragically decapitated teddy bear, sends his thanks for all the kind thoughts and wishes for a speedy recovery. The patient is resting comfortably after brief surgery last night, performed once I realized that I am simply incapable of sleeping without my teddy. A more extensive procedure is planned for a later date.

My lawyers assure me that the pending malpractice suit has no merit and will be summarily dismissed as this was life-saving surgery and no promises were made to the bear regarding aesthetics. I'm sure that, once he has been gifted with a new, jaunty bow to wear round his neck, the sutures will be nicely hidden. And it's not like he was ever going to be "cover bear" material, for heaven's sake.

With that matter tended to, I managed to finish spinning up the first bobbin of superwash merino sock yarn and the second is begun. That project is well on its way to being finished before the summer vacation draws to a close. No need to concern myself on that front. Which is good. Because I have a little something else that has been tap-tap-tapping at my brain and I probably need to put some thought into how I'm going to deal with it. Or even if I need to deal with it. I'm not sure...

But, I think my cat may be fat.

There. I said it. I've been wondering about it. Pondering it. Considering the feline from all angles and trying to determine if I have allowed her to expand beyond the space that a cat was meant to occupy. I'm just not sure. Now, I know what you're thinking:

Ummmm...she's your cat. You are looking at her. You've mentioned that you lug her around all day. We know that scales are banned from your home and that you can't weigh her, but isn't a fat cat something that is rather obvious? Doesn't the fact that you are questioning her current girth give you some indication that she is bigger than she should be?

All valid points. But, there are a few other factors at work here. First, there is the whole, "she's my baby and perfect in mine eyes" thing. One can't underestimate the power of denial when assessing a cat's fattitude. She is also rather short of body. Thus, even when she is svelte, she tends to have a rounder appearance than other kitties. Then there's the coat. Or should I say, "coats." She is, at the very least, double-coated. I strongly suspect that there are actually somewhere around 47 layers of coat surrounding her frame, but that could be an estimate that is a bit on the higher end of things. Either way, she has always looked bigger than she be. Many is the time that people (her vet included) have almost launched her over their shoulders as they were braced to pick up a much larger beast.

My Big, Fluffy Kitty is a walking optical illusion. An enigma... But, I still think that she might be a porky enigma.

My former vet told me on several occasions that one should be able to feel a cat's ribs clearly. I dug around in that fluffy, gelatinous mess for a while and came to the conclusion that my cat has no bones whatsoever. This, upon further reflection, seems somewhat far-fetched, though.

So, I decided to get highly scientific about this. I attempted to find a common object for comparison, something that many readers could look at and use for scale. This was a bit tricky as the object needed to be somewhat universal, but inconspicuous enough that the Big, Fluffy Kitty wouldn't want to eat it. While I realize that the use of US currency sort of limits those who live in other countries, it was really the best choice given what I had on hand. So, I used a dollar bill. That would be about 15.5 centimeters in length. So tell me...

Does this bill make my cat look fat?

If you're not sure, I'd be happy to put other stuff on or around my cat for comparison as time permits. I'm pretty sure that she has no idea what's going on back there. Forty-seven coats...she can't even feel it.

I am currently putting together some sort of Old Cat Aerobics program just to be on the safe side. I'm thinking that we could do it as part of our mother/daughter time.

The BFK is not the only one around here who may be a bit bigger than she used to was...

SA