Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Pick Your Title.

You can call it, "The Wednesday Night Bullet Post," or you can call it "How To Mess With A Sheep." Either will fit. I'm pretty flexible on this one.

*You may remember my mentioning that I tweaked my knee while practicing a side-shuffle evasion maneuver in my class on Monday. Because I am overly-confident in my ability to camouflage certain things and fool the world into thinking that I am immortal, I opted to not tell the instructor about this. In my oddly functioning mind, it made perfect sense to just fudge my way through the class and avoid anything that might force me to sit out. I really didn't want to have to re-take this class.

*I am delusional.

*You may also recall my mentioning on several occasions that Karma hates me.

*Part of becoming a trainer for this program requires that you demonstrate the ability to successfully teach certain skills. The instructor randomly chose different strategies and concepts then assigned them to class members. He had no reason to think that anyone might need any accommodations since a certain Sheep was playing the role of The Immortal Martyr.

*It probably won't tax your imagination too much to guess which skill ended up on my To Teach list. In the event that you are tired or just a hopeless optimist, I'll give you a hint: The first word is, "side," and the second is, "shuffle."

*I also had to teach front, rear and headlock choke releases. If you are ever being choked to death by someone who is not all that invested in actually strangling you, give me a call. I'll have you out in a jiffy.

*Last night's internet interruption was the capper on an overall challenging day. Despite the fact that I really needed to be studying for today's test and teaching assignments, many hours were spent trying to "fix" the internet. It was about two hours before I figured out to call tech. support. Imagine my surprise to learn that my small, Maine town and another in Pennsylvania were experiencing outages.

*I am sure that, in Internet Logic, it makes perfect sense that two small towns in different states, many, many miles apart, would lose service at the same time and that these would be somehow considered, "connected" in the minds of the internet people. But, I still have something of a mind-boggle going on with that...

*Not having the internet caused me to begin to revert back to a sort of primitive state. It was only a matter of time before I started churning butter and talking to actual people as I shopped in actual stores while wearing actual shoes. Thankfully, service was restored this morning and my life has returned to its high tech state, complete with anonymous encounters and shopping in my pajamas. It all makes sense again...

*I now have the rest of the week to suck up the last of the summer vacation fumes. I'll probably nap through most of it. And ice my knee.

*I'm also thinking that I should finish up one or two more of the things I put on those Index Cards Of Summer Organization that I wrote up back in June. I seem to recall thinking that there would be so much time to get so many things finished...

*I am delusional.

Have a good night, everyone! My class is over, my internet service restored and I've missed you all so very, very much. I send you big, sloppy internet kisses. And they taste like black and white cookies because I thought that I maybe deserved a couple after all my trials.

SA

12 comments:

mehitabel said...

Oh, poor Sheepie! There is nothing like having your internet down--unless it's having all your power go out at once! Do enjoy soaking up your last days of "freedom" while you can, get that knee back in working condition--and if it doesn't get better soon, take it to the doctor--ask me how I know this is a good idea!
It's currently 101 degrees here and it's 4pm. I don't want to know what it was at 1. (I was knitting at Starbucks and complaining that their a/c didn't work. Obviously, it did!)

Ronni said...

I think you did very well with no internet. You didn't lose all the articles from your post yesterday after all. (That is what things like "a" and "the" are called isn't it? I slept through all my grammar classes, apparently.)

I hope you enjoy the rest of your time off. Knee Icing time is prime knitting time as long as you don't have to get up to get something.

Julie said...

Two hours wasted trying to fix the internet when you could have been knitting with Chicks (and David!). Missed you last night; guess we probably won't see you now until Thanksgiving or Christmas :( Another reason to hate the end of summer!

Bobbi said...

how awful. the knee I mean, although the internet comes in a close second :)

Mel said...

Of course, you realize that the real question is whether this class taught you anything that would be useful in a zombie attack. Because, really, don't all things come back to that ultimately?

Beth said...

Churning butter - very funny! It seems like just yesterday that you were making out your index cards. How in the world did time fly by that quickly?! I hope your knew heals up in time for school.

Mouse said...

Our internet went out the other night for about 12 hours. I suddenly realized that I couldn't even start a new knitting project because all of the patterns I wanted to knit were online at Knitty! DOH!
I hope your knee gets better soon.

Sheila said...

Too tired to write...Buenas Noches!

kmkat said...

Black and white cookies are a sure cure for downed internet, aren't they?

Hope your knee gets better quickly!

Mia said...

Oh yes.. sounds to me like the cookies were well deserved *grin* I wonder if I can find a bakery on my way home today...

Lorraine said...

I just want to know if cookies cure the common cold.

We lost power this week during a wild thunderstorm at 2 in the morning. Talk about addicted to technology. I was frantic, trying to figure out how to power the computer so I could check the local radar. Almost got the gas generator out to get it going.

Debby said...

Enjoy those last days of summer for all they are worth! Last night I had to get a new phone and went to Staples...all the kids here went back yesterday and were there getting their school supplies. It made me twitchy! It must be doubly hard for the teachers. :)

I hope your knee is better and the internet is sailing along now!