Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Held Hostage On A Wednesday

There will be something of a "tone" to today's Wednesday Night Bullet Post. Sorry. I gots me the grumpies. It's not you. It's me.

*There is a little of the helpless frustration associated with staying home and waiting for a package delivery. You can't control the speed at which the truck is driving. Nor can you assert your will over the number of deliveries that need to be made on that day. All you can do is keep checking the tracking website and know that your stuff is coming ever closer to you. I like tracking packages for the most part. It's like travel...

*I don't like the part where you have to restrict fluids to avoid bathroom breaks and and keep the TV down low so you don't miss the grinding, clanking and back-up-beeping of the delivery truck. That's kind of rough. Especially when you are spending the day jumping to the window for a look-see at the slightest noise. You have no TV for entertainment and all that jumping can't be good for the already straining bladder. You can see where the frustration might build up as the hostage situation continues.

*Frustration, however, can quickly turn to rage. Especially when, after denying yourself any of the activities that make life comfortable and entertaining, you check the tracking site and read that they have attempted to deliver your package and are punishing you for not being home by withholding your stuff for another day.

*This makes no sense if you have been home all day not using the bathroom. Waiting for the package.

*After spending several minutes howling theatrically at the heavens and cursing your weak bladder for that one trip to the facilities in twelve hours, it may occur to you to check outside and see if a delivery slip was left as documentation of your bad package receiving behavior. Rage can turn to white hot fury once you see that there is no slip to be found.

*For some reason, the delivery people have joined the long queue of individuals who are out to get me. And who lie to me.

*And I can't even identify this negligent, lying, Sheep-hating delivery company because they still have my stuff. It's a dual hostage situation: me stuck at home/my stuff stuck in a truck. I have to be careful. This is like a negotiation.

*Why don't I throw them a compliment? The delivery company in question is quite brilliant in their complaint evasion ability. There is no number one can call that doesn't lead one to a voice activated menu of options, none of which include, "You lied about coming to my house and you have my stuff that I paid for, you meanie!" All you can do is email. Genius!!!

*I've never even laid hands on my elusive stuff and I already miss it.

*I dyed some of the merino today just to see what it would look like. It's pretty!

* I only dyed a bit of the merino because it seems that my big dye pot is no longer serviceable. It may be rusting a bit...not good for dyeing.

*I'd order a new dye pot, but I'm imagining that having my dye pot held hostage in the back of a truck would just put me over the edge. I'll stick to the smaller crock pot for the time being.

*Tomorrow is supposed to be very, very humid. Sticky. Yucky. Hot. It is wrong to hate the meteorologist for making this prediction. But I do.

*I will be stuck in my second floor, not so air conditioned condo. You know...waiting out the hostage crisis.

Don't mind me, folks. Like I said, I'm just a bit on the grumpy side today. I'm sure that things will take a turn for the better tomorrow. Assuming that the moisture-soaked air allows for it, I should have some dry and brightly dyed merino for your viewing pleasure.

Or I will be clinging to the hood of a delivery truck as I attempt a daring rescue on behalf of my stuff.



Donna Lee said...

I hate that whole waiting thing. I think it's partly because everything is instant today (not like in the old days,"when I was a kid, we waited for our packages and we LIKED it!") I hate even more when I try to track the package and find out the tracking site is down. How dare they keep my package info from me? Or when they say "we shipped your package but we are not going to tell you where it is because you are a whiner and we don't like you". Not that I take any of that personally, mind you.

April said...

You're not waiting for an "Amanda" doll from WalMart, are you? Because if you are, then they will attempt to deliver it THREE times to heaven only knows what address since you stayed home for three days waiting for it.

Then you will have to drive to the FedEx depot only to be told you're at the wrong depot.

It will then take you 30 minutes of circling the "other" depot's parking lot because you can't find the entrance (conveniently hidden behind a chain link fence).

Oh wait, it's not Dec. 27th, is it?

trek said...

I have a lot of experience with telephoning delivery companies. It seems that at least 80% of the time, the delivery is messed up someway, somehow. Hence all of my experience with the major delivery truck companies. Want me to call them on your behalf?? After all, I am home with a small child who just loves to ask me questions while I am on the phone with the aforementioned delivery types. She would find this highly amusing.

Beth said...

Oh, how frustrating! I was going to suggest getting a dog since dogs bark at delivery trucks. But, if the truck doesn't actually show up, a dog won't do you any good. Maybe you'll get a little package in your mailbox tomorrow to cheer you up. :)

Mel said...

Well, when that happens to me, I call the local office from whence it was sent out for delivery and let them know in no uncertain terms that I was home and if the delivery person said they attempted, then they are prevaricating something awful. It may have been a fill-in person who didn't know the area well enough, but sometimes they will send them back out if it's not too late.

Jeanne said...

Heh. Get this—I have been awaiting a certified letter containing a form that will result in my acquiring some money (temporary construction easement on my old house). I was sitting at my computer, where all it takes is a glance up to see out the window. I heard the mailman. I saw him go by. I heard him pause briefly, then move on—like usual. Later I went out to get the mail. There was a slip in the box "Sorry we missed you"—regarding the Certified mail he "attempted" to deliver! I went right over to the post office and repeated this story. They were nonplussed. It's lazyness, pure and simple. Why bother stopping the truck, getting out, and delivering the package like you're PAID to do, when it's so much easier to drop a "sorry" slip in the box and make the deliveree do it for you?

It seems to go better if the item is very large and heavy and takes three guys to unload (like my loom). Those get delivered. Good luck.

catsmum said...

I on the other hand are now post-grump although equally housebound - D has a rotten cold so I've been home for 3 days of reading Harry Potter 5 and 6, watching the SciFi channel and keeping away from Ms Caramel...

Cursing Mama said...

dying (pun) to know whats in that truck -

Lorraine said...

Worse yet, companies that don't provide tracking info. I've got a book on order from England and the best estimate I received was 28 days. I'm determined NOT to wait for it. I'm completely giving it the cold shoulder. I refuse to stalk an innocent mailbox . . .

Nancy said...

Ooh that's the worst!!! I totally understand you being grumpy. I hate being held hostage by those-delivery-people. We had a package come to us that had to be signed for. I knew we would NOT be home. So I called the company and said, "We won't be home, can you deliver it somewhere else". The answer was "Yes, but not until we fail delivery the first time". It took at least 4 phone calls, and good thing I checked each morning to see where they were going to deliver it; because otherwise it might have been sent back.

We also had a package that the tracking info (which isn't so accurate) say it was delivered on tuesday. There was NO package on tuesday. NONE. we looked behind all the pots, and posts, and even under the rocks (it really wasn't very small box, but you never know). It showed up the next day.

mehitabel said...

Well, I have so far spent 3 days as hostage to the people from my local utility co. who are SUPPOSED to come pick up my old freezer for recycling. I'm doing THEM a favor and t hey're holding ME hostage? I wasn't nice when I called to schedule the 4th appointment... we'll see what happens!