Monday, June 21, 2010

The Glow Fades

OK.  That's it.  My sunny attitude regarding this week's mandatory teacher workshops has officially clouded over.  No more shall I wax optimistically about the extra dollars in my next paycheck or be thankful that they are doing this in June rather than stealing my last precious vacation days in August. This was, without a doubt, the longest day of my entire life and I'm including that horrific day I spent getting a root canal without the benefit of working pain killers.  Seriously.  I would kill to go back to that delightful day in history.  I look back on it with fond and wistful nostalgia.

It all started when I fooled myself into thinking that having to be at school at 8:00 in the morning instead of at 7:00 would give me more time to enjoy the morning.  It doesn't.  Somehow, that extra hour evaporated faster than the morning dew and I ended up having to rush around like my usual manic self on a regular day.  I arrived in the cafeteria in a timely fashion but that was more luck than anything else.

It's not my fault, by the way.  Everyone told me that The Dresden Files would get better if I just stuck with it.  Not that the first few were bad, mind you.  They just weren't living up to the expectations I'd managed to set.  However, I offer up a sincere, "you weren't kidding" to those who spoke up for Harry.  I was utterly incapable of leaving the house until I'd finished Death Masks: A Novel of the Dresden Files (The Dresden Files, Book 5).  Then I accidentally started Blood Rites: A Novel of the Dresden Files and you can see how things would start to spiral out of control time-wise from there...

The agenda looked grueling, more so since they "adjusted" it over the weekend.  There were promises made for an early escape if we stayed on task, but even I knew that was just something presenters say to keep the masses from revolting around lunchtime.  We were in for the long haul and there was nothing to be done about it.

I managed to knit for a while.  That was nice.  But then I needed my hands free to hold the table steady in order that I might more effectively beat my head upon it and that was the end of that.

Tomorrow's presentation doesn't look to be any less exhausting, either.  To make matters worse, no one can really explain with any clarity just what the heck it is we are supposed to be doing on Wednesday and Thursday.  They don't even seem to agree on where we should be assembling.  And don't even get me started on the taunts coming from those who only have to attend two days of this exercise in mass torture.  We, the truly trapped and miserable, hate them with a passion that could ignite a thousand suns.

I find it highly unlikely that I will make it through the next few days without criminal charges being pressed.  That or I will find myself falling asleep and then I'll be nominated as team leader for one of the work groups.  Which, I suppose, is also a good way to end up wearing an orange jumpsuit.  It is going to end badly if someone doesn't release me unto the loving arms of my summer vacation soon.

On the other hand, maybe it's for the best that I'm not home this week.  When I dragged my weary self back to the manse I discovered not one, but two, work men dangling from the roof and hammering enthusiastically away at the facade.  It seems that the Intrusive But Trying To Be Considerate About It Guy brought his associate along today.  That would be the Guy Who Owns The Really Big Radio And Isn't Afraid To Use It.

It wasn't going to be quite the self-indulgent start to vacation I'd dreamed of either way.  While I'm certain that committing acts of aggression against those who seek to thwart me isn't going to end up well, I still can't help but wonder.

Would my cell be more conducive to the peaceful glow than life on the outside?

SA

13 comments:

Donna Lee said...

I don't think cells are quiet and I hear that they don't allow knitting needles (and probably not spinning wheels either). It might be restful until Big Bertha takes a shine to you.

Might be better to suck it up and put up with the trainings....

sheep#100 said...

I hear that lots of prisoners take up knitting. You've got a head start!

Word verification: toutarse, fitting, somehow, isn't it?

Julia G said...

Yes, head-thumping is definitely a two-handed task. But with your luck, they would probably start re-siding your cellblock, at six in the morning of course.

I can relate to your siding sorrows -- we have delightful neighbors, really nice folks, who have been constructing new addition(s) on their abode for the last several years. Yes, years. It's kind of a Stephen King's Rose Red riffing on Sarah Winchester's endless construction situation. It's the random staccato of hammering and thumping that makes you start chewing drywall after a month or six.

Gracey is not my name.... said...

Today I spent from 9-2:30 packing my room...and I'll be back tomorrow...then hopefully...finally I can start my summer vacation....Good luck on the workshop

Kath said...

Let me put it to you like this..I do not think they have cake in prison. 'Nuff said.

=Tamar said...

Is the place air-conditioned?
If not, no jury would convict.

Beth said...

You can do it, SA! Good luck!

Lynne said...

Think of the routine - the early rising, the mandatory lights out, the ban on sharp, pointy objects and soft, mewing ones - it's really not worth it, is it?

Anne P said...

Sigh. I think crochet hooks are all that's allowed. You need to work on another hobby, right? So there's your silver lining. :P

Cursing Mama said...

Don't they sell glasses at the dollar store - where, in place of lenses, they have pictures of eyes? Could you get away with wearing a pair of those? You'd look like you were awake and attentive & really be sound asleep planning for waffles.

Knitting Linguist said...

The silver lining here is that you are being paid to avoid Radio Dude, which is something (a very small something, true). Two more days, you can do it!

Lorraine said...

Gah! Banging just sucks. Neighbor reroofed house the last week of school. Since I homeschool, you can imagine how irritating it got.

At least I don't have to risk prison time because of mandatory training, though. Is orange your color?

knitseashore said...

If you threaten bodily harm on yourself, will they back away slowly and let you go free? It's worth a shot.

Poor SA. (patting you on back)