Tuesday, December 08, 2009

Involuntary Clenching

OK. The first thing you should know is that it was cold this morning. Wicked cold! I had to scrape the ice from the windshield before I could drive. It is important that you know about the cold before you pass judgement.

I was all clenchy from the cold. That is what happens. You feel the chill and you tense up. I do not control the weather. I do not control involuntary muscle reactions. You should factor that in, too. It's science. You have to acknowledge it.

And is it my fault that cars take a while to warm up? Sure, I could have gone out earlier to start the car, but that is wasteful. And not good for the planet. Plus, I already get up at 5:00 and leave by 6:00. There isn't much "earlier." If I leave any sooner, I'd be into yesterday. That is time and space and the universe talking. I do not control any of that stuff either.

Are we clear on all this? Do we understand the incredible forces against which I was working this morning? I certainly hope so. Because otherwise, you might start tittering and giggling at my expense and that would hardly be fair under the circumstances.

There I was, all cold and clenched up from the shivering while driving from the manse out to the main road. I needed to take a right. That is also not my fault. It is just the direction in which I have to travel so I can get to work. I have to do lots of stuff like look both ways, turn the wheel and adjust the volume on the radio. It is a busy time. And that's when it happened.

I threw out my back. Turning the steering wheel of my car. But it is not my fault because I was clenchy and it is easy to tweak a back muscle when you are turning right from a clenched position while still maintaining a good radio volume and looking for other cars.

That muscle stayed firmly torqued throughout the whole 40 minute commute to school. It did not release me from its iron grasp until I got out of the car and stood. It's a good thing I am fully aware of the effects of clenching, shivering, volume control and safe driving. Otherwise, I might start thinking I am old and capable of hurting myself by sitting in a motor vehicle...

I should probably start warming up and stretching before driving to work. It is winter. There are many more opportunities for me to hurt myself doing absolutely nothing. It looks like another chance will present itself tomorrow. There's a whopper of a storm coming in. I'm 90% sure we will be having at least a delayed start to school. I'm 75% sure we won't be going at all, but I'm hedging my bets on that one. Should the former be the case, I have to teach the Safety Procedures class all day and it won't be a good time to have a clenchy back. I'm going to need to be limber.

Should the latter come to pass, I won't need to spend an hour or so getting out of chokeholds. I won't have to be quite so limber, but I'd hate to waste a snow day with a sore back. I have a Christmas tree to put up and some knitting to do.


Fingerless mitts. You can't have enough of 'em. They help ward off the cold and the clenching.


The cold weather is upon us. There is no denying it. Stretching out a bit seems like the wise course of action. You never know. I might hurt myself changing the channel or scratching my nose...

SA

13 comments:

sheep#100 said...

Inside out your jammies, Sheepie! You can't afford another clenching.

I do have to say, though, that when I read your post title, a whole 'nother plethora of meanings smacked me in my aching head...

Jeanne said...

I pulled a neck muscle once while reaching into the fridge for milk. It happens.

Hope your clench is gone, and that your snow day is clench-free.

Mel said...

I made something bad happen to my back once by rolling over in bed and stretching. Be careful!

Beth said...

You drove like that for 40 minutes?! You are a stronger woman than me, that's for sure! Good luck on the snow day!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, my mind dove into the nether regions when I read "clenching", too. It is true, though, what you say about clenching in the cold. I was just thinking about that today when I decided to walk up to the garage to look for Hannibal. It's only about 75 feet, but I thought I would be less likely to slip and fall if I were warmly dressed in coat and scarf and Calorimetry and gloves. Less clenching, more limberness. (It worked. No falling.)

Hope your back is better fast!

=Tamar said...

I once pulled a neck muscle turning my head to look at the next page of what I was typing. I agree, do some careful stretching before going out to drive.

knitseashore said...

The cold is terrible on muscles and joints! I tend to tense up in my hips and boy do they ache. I am too young for that (my story and I'm sticking to it!). I hope my renewed slavery to peddling my bike will keep them loose this winter.

I hope some stretching will help you with the cold -- 40 minutes driving with a sore back is too much! Glad you made it to school OK, and hope you have a day off tomorrow!

Kath said...

Where you live do they sell ThermCare wraps? They are the most awesome thing - you peel off the backing and stick it to your lower back, neck, whatever - and it emits heat for close to 8 hours. Best. Thing. Ever. I'm thinking one of those on your back will give Sheepie a much better morning drive!

Mia said...

oh yeah, I feel the clenching this morning! And I bet you don't have school today. lucky girl... I can already smell the wafooz cooking :)

Donna Lee said...

I had to scrape the car, too. I felt the clenching of the muscles. It doesn't matter how warm yout thoughts, the muscles clench!

We are getting inundated with rain (like we need more of it) no snow. I guess I should be glad because it meant I didn't have to scrape the car....

And btw, in light (pun intended) of your nanowromomo, check out this link
http://www.xkcd.com/

It made me laugh out loud and then I thought of you.

Karen said...

I just knew something had happened. I knew it before I'd finished the first paragraph. The clenching gave it away. Relax and stretch. A snow day is totally deserved.

Denise said...

Hope you can get more limber before the next snowy cold day! By the way how's the phone situation? Curious minds want to know.

Anonymous said...

You're not old until you throw your back out by simply putting on your underwear. I'm old.