Wednesday, September 28, 2011

WNBP: The Plague Days

We here at the Sheepish House Of Snotty Tissues And Whimpering are eternally grateful for your patience as I stagger my way through this horrific cold.  Perhaps I went a little too far last time, comparing my trials to that of the poor souls in that Contagion movie.  But, in my defense, it really is a wicked nasty cold.

On the plus side, it seems to be letting go just a bit and I truly do believe I can find my way clear to do a Wednesday Night Bullet Post.  I've hardly had to blow my nose at all today and, at one point, my voice came back almost like it used to was before the froggy croak took over.  I should be fine with typing.

Let's see how it goes.  I can always throw myself to the floor and quickly nap if things go badly...

*I've mentioned the cold, right?

*It's sort of been the topic of choice since I woke up with it on Saturday morning.  

*The speed with which this thing took hold is beyond anything you can imagine.

*Crappy weekend.

*On Monday, I went back to work hoping for sympathy.  Got none.

*On Tuesday, I lost my voice and figured someone would notice that.  Then the sympathy would fairly crash down upon me in great gooey waves of sweetness.

*Not so much with that.

*I had a voice today, but it was still that of an ancient toad with a three pack a day habit.

*Still not so much with the gooey sweetness and sympathy.

*I was up most of the night coughing so I was too tired to really care anyway.

*In spite of my husky speaking voice, I actually feel much better than I have in days.

*Now I can focus on the back muscles I locked up after I took the NyQuil and fell asleep in the most awkward of positions for the night.

*Sort of between sitting, lying down and something that might be along the lines of cow milking.

*I told you it was a weird position for sleeping...

*I ate a lot of chicken soup this week.

*When I bought that pressure canner, I really hadn't planned on canning meat.  That just seemed odd.  Not to mention a tad bit deadly.

*I have been truly grateful to that hunk of metal this week.  Grab some chicken and carrots from the pantry and peas from the freezer, then season and heat it up with a little bit of broth that the grocery store makes...and there is soup!

*Frozen peas are better than even home canned.  I hate canned peas.

*I also think I hate carrots but I love them if I spent hours over a hot stove getting them into jars.

*And you don't wanna know how awful my own broth is.  The stuff from the grocery store is my best bet.

*I made the mistake of reading about cantaloupes riddled with listeria today.

*I'm usually not allowed on science or news sites during school hours.

*The Cheerful Teaching Assistant greatly enjoyed my half hour rant on how we were all going to die because of tainted fruit and that I always knew it would be the fruit that gets us!!!

*A few of the kids overheard and thus was spawned The Best Conversation Of The Week:

Little Mr. Spock: (looking perplexed and a little bit condescending)  What are you talking about?  There are no cantaloupes in Maine.

Ms. Sheep:  Yes there are.  They are right at the grocery store waiting to kill us with their infected rinds!!!  Oh...wait.  I think you might be thinking of antelopes.

LMS:  Huh?

MS:  Antelope.  They're like deer and they jump around.  Cantaloupes are round melons that never jump and apparently spell our doom.

(the lad who is) Too Cute For Words And Knows How To Work It:  Yeah!  Cantaloupes!  Those things are hard.  You have to hit them with a really big knife!

MS:  NO!  Those are  COCONUTS!!!  Sheesh....what the heck do you people eat around here????

(The Cheerful Teaching Assistant tries to say something at this point, but we will never know what it is because she is too overcome with laughter.  Several attempts are made throughout the day to find out what she wanted to add, but each ends with the same wheezing gasps.  I'll bet it was pretty funny, though...)

*Blogger doesn't want to save this.  It keeps telling me that there is an error.

*Blogger also still doesn't want me to link to Amazon with anything remotely resembling ease so I have to navigate back and forth.

*Which doesn't work if you can't save, right?

*I finished reading Roadkill.

*I'd already saved that link.  

*I want to tell you about Blackout but I can't because I don't want to lose everything when I go back to Amazon to get the link.

*It's a conundrum, I tellya!

*I'm almost done with the Cal Leandros saga.

*At least the parts that are already written.  I'm sure there will be more someday.

*Fun stuff and it all gets better as the series rolls along.

*Even Cal refers to himself as angsty by the time we get to the last few books.

*Let's see...nope.  Still not saving.

*I guess Blogger has the plague, too.

*I don't feel badly for Blogger.  It isn't exactly making this easier.

*I went to work and taught children the difference between melons and mammals today.  I did my job even though I felt crappy.

*Hence, you can see how I might be less than sympathetic.

So ends another fun-filled WNBP and I hardly mentioned the cold symptoms at all!  Only like...three hundred times or so!  Which is good since I have been living with it for days and days and it has consumed my life.  I'm now going to head over to the HTML tab so I can save a copy of this post before Blogger loses it entirely.  Perhaps someday I'll even be able to put it up so all the world can appreciate how well I did whilst living through the plague.

By then,  I'll be fully recovered and ready to start suffering from the killer melons...



trek said...

As I read today's post, all I could think about was Jeff Dunham's dummy Peanut.

catsmum said...

1. Feel better soonest
2. I'm greatful it's not the full blown monkey-pox this time [ it isn't, right ?]
3. Thankyou thankyou thankyou for introducing me to Johannes Cabal. wasm't 100% sure about the first. LOVED him as the detective.
4.** great gooey waves of sympathy **

Donna Lee said...

I'll send you great gooey waves of sympathy too. But be careful what you ask for. You don't know what kind of gooey you could end up with.

Anonymous said...

Fresh, crisp, but delightfully soft sympathy here. That gooey stuff sounds gross.

Julia G said...

Just got over our back-to-school cold-and-cough fest. Feel better, Ms. Sheep!