Sunday, December 12, 2010

To Tree Or Not To Tree...

I am a person for whom internal dialogue is constant.  I have lots and lots of conversations with myself because I find me endlessly fascinating and because the cats only listen when some sort of food description is involved in the wording.  For the past few weeks, the chats with myself have had a theme.

"It's almost time to put up the Christmas tree!  Isn't that exciting!!!"

"Why yes!  It is.  I am almost giddy with the anticipation!"

Days later, it sounds something like this:

"You know, I really should start pulling out the ornaments and stuff.  Christmas comes but once a year and I want to enjoy my tree for as long as humanly possible!"

"Right you are! It's not like we have our own little elves to do it!  I shall get on that just as soon as I finish up a few things.  And take my nap..."

The mood started to get a little less festive after a few more days passed and there was still no tree in the living room.

"There is still no tree in the living room.  Think how nice a tree would look in the living room.  Why don't we have a tree in the living room?  Other people have trees in the living room."

"Christmas has gotten too commercial.  I don't think I should be participating in such a gratuitous display.  Plus it is a lot of work to put up a Christmas tree.  And don't forget the cats!  The Very Complicated Kitty might try to eat a tree if he suddenly came upon one in the middle of the living room."

Things were still pretty polite up to that point.  Yesterday, however, I noted a distinct change in tone.

"Still no tree???  This is ridiculous.  What if January first marks the coming of the Zombie Apocalypse or you suddenly decide to join a cult?  What if this is the last Christmas tree you will EVER HAVE?"

"Really?  That's nice.  Quite the holiday spirit you've got going on there.  You want a tree so much, why don't you go drag the stuff out and take care of it, Little Miss Tidings Of Comfort And Joy?"

The holiday trimmings have yet to be removed from their storage area in spite of my good intentions and self-nagging.  As much as I hate the idea of becoming one of the treeless people...I simply cannot find the energy to go get the sparkly baubles.  I know I would enjoy the tree once it was up, but the act of walking ten feet to the spare room to begin the process seems like far to much trouble.

In fairness, the last few years I have been graced with a snow day early in December.  Snow days mean that the phone rings in the wee hours of the morning and I am informed that I must not attempt to drive to school that day.  Since the weather is foul and I'm not going anywhere anyway, putting up the tree seems like a nice thing to do.  Plus it's all snowy and stuff so I can't help but feel inspired.  This year, there has been no snow day.  At the moment, it is raining.  This is not conducive to tree trimming.  It was highly conducive to ice scraping this morning when I was trying to clear my windshield enough to drive to the grocery store.  But tree trimming?  Not so much.

I'm not completely devoid of holiday spirit, though.  I have eaten six candy canes over the course of this week and have knit more over the past two months than I have in recent memory.  Seriously.  I swear it!  I just can't show it until December 26th is all.  But I am filled with warm glow of impending giving and redolent with the scent of artificial peppermint!

Maybe the internal dialogue will take a turn for the better soon.  Or maybe the dire predictions regarding the end of all Christmases will strike enough fear in me that I'll put up the tree out of sheer panic.  I like to think I'll have a tree this year in spite of the marked lack of elves around here who do it for me. 

Then I can go through a similar argument with myself when it's time to take it down...



trek said...

And Hm and RM had no part in these conversations?!

Karen said...

But won't the kitties be disappointed if Santa has no place to leave their gifts?

Anonymous said...

All I need to to is walk 15 feet and plug in the tree. Yeah, we never took it down. But even that meager effort is too much.

I suspect you will have a snow day soon -- as soon as this Storm Of The Century™ leaves the Midwest and hits the Right Coast.

Kath said...

Since I haven't had a tree in over ten years, I am probably the wrong one to give an opinion! But for many years I did put lights up on my balcony, or at the very least strew a few bits of garland or put some ornaments in a bowl and call it good.

But this year? Not one darn thing. Between still living with more boxes than furniture, new home, new job - I'm just taking this year off. Buy da boyz some christmas toys and voila - instant holiday decor!

Jeanne said...

Well, there may be good reason to avoid the tree, what with complicated kitties and all. This video demonstrates why my five-cat house has been treeless since 1998 (when Zander came home to roost). If you haven't seen it yet:

Simon's Cat, "Santa Claws"

Mel said...

After the Great Monkey Debacle of Aught-Nine, we are finding ourselves debating whether the tree is such a good idea, after all. Cougar does like to live up to his name, after all.

Beth said...

I'm so with you on the "no tree" possibility this year. I've been negotiating with E about not having one but she wouldn't hear of it. So it's been sitting there since 11/30 with one strand of lights and an angel on it. Maybe I should just call it done?

I'm catching up on my blog reading this morning. Looking forward to reading about what you've been doing.

Donna Lee said...

It seems like there is still plenty of time until Christmas springs out of hiding and falls upon us. I just know one day soon, I will wake up in a panic because the realization will have hit that Christmas is just under 2 weeks away.

Mia said...

I thought about a tree too.. but with two very rambunctious kitties - I thought maybe i'd better not. Besides, I hate putting all that stuff away. Put up a string of lights and some christmas tunes and call it good :)

Then go make a cocktail, sit back and enjoy the festivus :)

Mouse said...

I"m not sure what to tell you but I'm having a heck of a time getting MY very complicated & stubborn boy kitty to stop eating my fake xmoose tree this year. YMMV of course.

Julia G said...

You have to get the tree up for the VCK's first Christmas in his Forever Home!

I always drag my feet about putting up our tree though, in spite of pressure from special interest groups (the kids), because we always leave the tree up through New Year's and take it down January 2. But don't worry, I'm sure we'll all be inspired by the white stuff heading our way by the end of the week.

Cathy said...

Yea, me too. 2 boxes of decorations downstairs just waiting to be displayed but.... 3 or 4 very busy and athletic kitties upstairs just waiting for a chance.

Knitting Linguist said...

If it makes you feel any better, ours isn't up either. And, when we do put it up, we will have to put little pongi sticks in its pot (it's a live tree) in order to keep Gwilim from using it as his own personal litter box. Such are the holidays chez moi.

Carrie#K said...

We haven't done a tree in ahwile. We usually put up a minature Christmas Village, which is actually more work.

And by we, I mean my mother. My contribution is whining about having to get the boxes down and then! then! putting them back. There is oohing and ah-ing inbetween.