Wednesday, October 27, 2010

WNBP: The Power Of Pants

Well here it is!  Wednesday night!  And we all know what that means.  It's time for the Wednesday Night Bullet Post.  I think I can come up with a tidbit or two for you all.  Wednesdays are typically good for that...

*It is October.

*More properly, it is the end of October.

*Sort of a fluke that I remembered to check the weather forecast last night.

*Good thing.  Otherwise I might have dressed in a seasonably appropriate fashion.

*Not for 70 balmy degrees.

*This year's crop of students includes a number of somewhat...fragrant boys.

*At least I wasn't wearing a turtleneck and was comfortable.  Small blessings...

*(the boy who is) Dark And Disturbed is quite the story teller.  He is also a budding cartoonist and shows some real talent.  His best work is, well...Dark And Disturbed.  But in the best possible way, if that makes any sense.

*I like Dark And Disturbed.  D&D is funny and very cool.  

*He has a way about him.

*Today, he decided to embellish his regular life by adding drama.  As in, "When I want breakfast, I head off into the deepest, darkest part of the forest with nothing but a knife and the will to sustain myself!"

*From there it went like this:

D&D:  I hunt until I find my meal!  Like a man!!!

Ms. Sheep:  That's nice, dear.

D&D:  And I wear one of those things.  You know what I mean.

MS:  (sensing where this is going because she has spent a great deal of time with D&D):  Fine.  I know what you mean.  Moving on, now.

Cheerful Teaching Assistant:  What?  What is he wearing when he goes out to hunt for his breakfast like a real man?

D&D:  One of those things.  Things!  You know...(helpfully flaps his hand around his midsection.)

MS:  Please.  I beg you.  Don't...

CTA:  I still don't get it.

D&D:  (finally finding the right word)  A loincloth!  That's what it is!  A loincloth!  I stalk my prey while wearing a loincloth!!!

MS:  Therapy.  I needz it.

*The rest of the day, D&D added, "while wearing a loincloth" to every single thing he said.  Everything.

*Sometimes he posed in a manly, hunter-type manner whilst saying the word, "loincloth."

*I anticipate at any moment that I will be appearing on one of those news specials that feature educators desperately trying to explain how they found themselves in such a delicate situation.  There will be lots of close ups of my stricken face and people calling in to hurl verbal abuse at me while I defend myself.

*The Boy For Whom All The World's A Stage entered the room today and announced:

Today is one of those days when I wasn't sure if I was wearing pants.  Seriously.  I had to check when I got off the bus.  It just doesn't feel like I'm wearing pants!

*I am going to be on the news.  I know it.  I might even be on one of those week long investigation specials.

*My name will go down in history and not in a good way.

*Why can't these kids think of themselves as wearing pants, for crying out loud?????

*At the very least, could they envision themselves fully clad while at school?  Is that too much to ask???

*It's actually too hot to knit.

*Or crochet.

*I have found myself in the mood to re-read old favorites, lately.

*This weekend, I picked up and finished Lost Souls by Poppy Z. Bright.

*She's not for everyone.  Sometimes not even for me.

*Dark stuff.  She doesn't pull any punches.  But kind of beautiful in its way.

*Now I'm revisiting Shadowland by Peter Straub.

*I've had this book for years.  It's one I've literally read to tatters.  Straub is one of the greats.  

*Think I'm going to dig up my copy of Mystery (Blue Rose Trilogy) next.  

*Feeling kind of badly for forgetting about good, old Peter for these past few years.

*I think it was running across The Hellfire Club on the bookshelf a while back that reminded me...

*I forgot to change Alpha Betta's water this past weekend.

*That's not true.  I remembered.  I just didn't feel like doing it and then I forgot.  

*I feel badly about it, but he seems to understand.

*At least I think he does.  He's a fish.  Who can tell?

*I'm not sick, but my left nostril was running all day.  

*Weird when it's a balmy, summer day in autumn.  

*Not sure why my nose was running.  It's not like I was chilled or anything.

*I was wearing pants, after all...

That's all I can think of for now.  I'll probably come up with all sorts of other stuff once I sign off, but that's the way these things go sometimes.  I really need to get off the couch and start getting ready for the teaching day tomorrow.   It's shaping up to be a busy one and I'll need to make sure the coffee maker is dripping at the earliest possible hour if I'm going to get enough of the go-juice in me to matter.  I also should pick out an outfit.

A complete outfit.  Top and bottom.  No loincloth.  That is the new dress code in my classroom.



Gracey is not my name.... said...

Now that I have chuckled my way through the WNBP, I can go correct papers...

Anonymous said...

Enjoy your 70˚. There is a category 3 hurricane headed your way fresh from the Midwest, complete with wind and rain and cold and maybe even snow. Bleah.

trek said...

All of my students wore pants to class yesterday and not one of them mentioned loincloths.

Pants presence and loincloth absence does not automatically correlate with normalcy, though, nor the ability to turn in homework on time, or even at all.

=Tamar said...

I assume that loincloth-substitutes, aka underpants, are allowed, as long as there are pants over them.
This is the kind of weather for which layers were invented.

Karen said...

You really should write a book. The things you hear every day make people laugh. You'll have to write under a pen name though...

Donna Lee said...

I promise to stand up for you when the investigative reporters show up. I'll swear that you are a good and normal person. (I'll leave out all mention of zombies).

The heat is on in our building. Yes, we know it's 75 degrees but it's past the middle of October so the heat is on. And so are the fans.

Cursing Mama said...

maybe the boys wouldn't be so fragrant if they weren't so hot because of the pants... I'd allow shorts. Not loincloth's though.

Julia G said...

Pants Optional Wednesday sounds like a bad idea in any environment.... but very funny!

I second Karen's motion that you should write a book -- maybe last year's NaNoWriMo? No pressure, just encouragement :-)

Knitting Linguist said...

This is how those Law and Order episodes start - with the innocent teacher suddenly inundated with loincloth-wearing students.

twinsetellen said...

A loincloth would be a very simple knit. With loads of room for embellishment.

Maybe that's not such a good idea...