Wednesday Isn't Tuesday And That Is Good

Monday was a holiday so that made Tuesday our Monday. Tuesday follows Monday during a normal week, but this week Tuesday is really Wednesday. Oddly enough, tomorrow is still Thursday no matter how the week began. I suppose that could get confusing, but it really makes sense if you think about how the "beginning of the week adjustment time" factors into the whole thing. All you really have to know is that it is Wednesday (sort of) and that it is time for the Wednesday Night Bullet Post! Here we go!

*I'm knitting a hat. I just thought you'd like to know that.

*I don't know if I will finish a hat, but that is something we will worry about down the road.

*For now it is enough to know that needles are moving.

*The schedules at school today were, once again, completely messed up.

*Yesterday, half the kids went to the wrong lunch.

*Today, the other half went to their "specials" while the rest went to their academic blocks like they were supposed to. No one got the email that reminded us to remember that email from a month ago which was designed to refresh our memories regarding the schedule changes that would be implemented during 7th grade state assessments.

*There have been several emails sent out over the past two days to help us remember the five tons of information we need in order to deal with state assessments.

*No one can remember all of it. Half can remember a third of it. But of that half, at least a quarter can't remember all of it. An eighth of that information is useless anyway.

*Hopefully, there will be no fractions on the math portion of the test because I doubt we taught any of that stuff right.

*The state isn't so hot with fractions either. Or with whole numbers for that matter.

*Great, huge, whacking chunks of money that we were supposed to get this year are no longer coming.

*We received another email today letting us know that all budgets are frozen. We are only allowed to spend for emergency purposes.

*At the bottom of the memo was a clarification regarding what the districts defines as an emergency.

*"Think: Handing Over Your Firstborn Child As Payment."

*I wish I was kidding. That is almost word for word what the email said.

*I do not have children.

*I am, however, a firstborn child.

*Hence, I think I am safe in assuming that the handing off of a firstborn is unpleasant.

*I almost responded to the email asking if this was correct or if people who didn't have children were exempt from the spending restrictions.

*I rethought that reply.

*The mood around the school district is kind of grim right now and I doubt that certain forms of humor will be appreciated.

*Mr. Principal is pretty stressed out due to all the scheduling problems and probably won't defend my witty emails.

*He said he had a stomach ache today when I asked how he was doing and looked very, very sad.

*Even his normally jaunty moustache was kind of droopy.

*I also didn't get any chocolate from him like I did yesterday.

*Sad, broke, droopy-moustached, no-chocolate principal...

*Maybe I should give him chocolate.

*But then Mr. Assistant Principal would want some. Then the secretaries would get wind of the sweet deals being made with Ms. Sheep and the whole thing would probably snowball from there.

*I'll have to think about the chocolate thing...

*Did I mention I'm knitting a hat?

*Hats are nice, even if they never get finished.

*Maybe I can sell unfinished hats for a living after they shut down the school due to lack of funds, working schedules and chocolate.

There is nothing quite like a Tuesday/Wednesday! You go through the whole day thinking it's only the second of the workweek and that you still have three more days of looking at a sad principal who can't let you spend any money. Unless it is taped to your firstborn child, that is.

But then you realize there are really only two!

SA