Saturday, October 17, 2009

In Sneeze Time

I felt pretty darned good on Thursday. I hadn't given it much thought until my Cheerful Teaching Assistant mentioned that she was exceptionally tired that day. That's when I realized that I was rather perky for a Thursday. In fact, so hale and hearty was I that I made a point of saying so. Because who doesn't like it when the conversation gets turned around to someone else's good fortune? I'm kind that way. I always like to take people's minds off their troubles.

My refreshing outlook on life continued after the school day was done. I stopped off at the local Department Store Of Never Ending Goods to pick up a few supplies and a movie for the kids to watch on Monday while I'm out at a training. I also found an emergency water purification system on the clearance rack. This, of course, has little to do with anything. I only mention it because:

1. It demonstrates that I was feeling good enough to peruse the clearance racks rather than just make my weary way home for the day


2. If one is the kind of person who would buy an emergency water purification system from the clearance rack then one is not going to miss an opportunity to mention it even if it doesn't have a darned thing to do with the story.

Once, home, I carried all my shopping bags, school paraphernalia and my over-stuffed purse up the stairs in one trip. I opened the door and deftly maneuvered around the Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty who was determined to trip me up for his afternoon entertainment. I set down my bags and, suddenly, I sneezed.

Just like that...I was sick.

Sneezes vary in duration. By comparison, this was a short one. It wasn't the kind where you stop dead in your tracks, raise your arms so you can flap your hands, crinkle your nose a few times in anticipation, announce to all and sundry, "I feel a sneeze coming on," and then go, "AH...AH...AHH......CHOOOOOOO!" But, just for the sake of argument, let's say it was that kind of sneeze. I still don't think that this is a reasonable amount of time in which to go from "perfectly well" to "sick enough to scare small children."

Apparently it is, though. Who knew?

That sneeze was followed by a billion more and I'm on my second box of tissues in as many days. I'm shivering and aching and not afraid to let everyone know this. When I arrived at school yesterday, I blamed all of the following in this order:

1. My Cheerful Teaching Assistant who sneezed the day before and covered her mouth with her hand instead of the crook of her elbow like we are supposed to.

2. The kid I call The Stalker because he has been in my class every year since fourth grade. He didn't much care that I blamed him and told me that I was mistaken because he never gets sick. I responded by licking my finger and rubbing it all over his pen. This seemed like a perfectly reasonable thing to do given that he called himself out sick just last week. Upon further consideration, though, I felt kind of badly about that and gave him candy. I'm supposed to be the mature one in the mix...

3. The school nurse because she gave my flu shot to some kid who probably didn't appreciate it like I would have.

I blamed these people and did so in my outside-my-head-voice. I don't care if I sound crazy. I have the plague and there will be suffering or my name isn't Needy, Whiny, Sheepish Annie!!!!! No one seemed all that concerned about my rampant laying of blame, though. I'm starting to get the impression I may have done this before and that it is no longer all that interesting.

It made me feel a little better, though. Not physically better, mind you. I'm dying here. But, on an emotional level, it was quite satisfying.

I've knit a little bit this weekend, but not much. Mostly, I've been enjoying the knitting of days past. More specifically, I've been rather grateful to my new hot water bottle cozy. When you are all shivery and miserable, there is nothing quite like a soothing hot water bottle nestled in its own little jacket. I don't even mind the dangling threads I haven't yet trimmed off the buttons. That minor detail doesn't affect the operation of a hot water bottle one little bit.

It took me a week or so to knit a hot water bottle cozy. It is going to take me considerably longer to knit the simple hat I'm working on. But a killer cold? That's quick and easy to achieve.

In sneeze time, anyway...



Julia G said...

Hope you feel better soon! In recent years--okay, decades-- I've noticed that just before I get sick, I have a really productive, energetic day which I've come to suspect is my immune system gearing up for major battle. I try to avoid caving into the pessimism and instead try to use it as a cue to take it easy and stock up on chicken soup-- even better on sale!

=Tamar said...

Yup. That blasted energy surge that makes you feel great just before it hits bottom. Tuck yourself in and stay there - oh, yeah, cats demand food - well, as much as possible.

Kath said...

Oooo,,yes, colds should be blamed on any co-workers, friends, or family who sneeze in one's vicinity. One of my co-workers is sick now and I am terrified of her cooties.

I think you need chicken soup and quality time on the couch with the cats - that's gotta help you feel better soon!

trek said...

It is truly the season of the cold and flu.

If you weren't a single condo-dweller, you'd have an even lrager pool of blame-ables. I can usually include Number Guy and Neatnik in my "you gave this to me" accusations. :o)

Feel better.

Elaine said...

Please feel better very soon! And I'm very glad you had the foresight to finish your hot water bottle cozy before you actually needed it.
My verification word is *muccessi* , which sounds totally gross but somehow appropriate, considering....

Donna Lee said...

Hate those stealth colds. They come out of nowhere and blam! suddenly you're all sick and snotty. I hope you feel better soon and those nasty sick kids keep their germs to themselves.

Anonymous said...

Good thing you got that water bottle cover knit just in time!!!

Feel better :)


Knitting Linguist said...

That's just WRONG. I hate it when everything turns on a sneeze like that -- it's not fair that you should have no warning of imminent disease-riddenness. I hope you feel better very very soon.