Monday, May 18, 2009

Cake-1; Sheepie-0 (+5 pounds)

I hate to admit it, but the cake beat me. How did this happen? I was so confident on Friday afternoon when I brought that bad boy home. (note to self: a child's birthday cake, complete with frolicking puppies and kittens, is not exactly bad boy material...) I figured I could easily consume most of it without even breaking a sweat. The rest I'd somehow choke down in the interest of saying that I did it.

But I just couldn't.

After I posted yesterday, I had every intention of following through on my promise to snarf down a bit more. I still thought I could pull it off. I was overconfident and maybe just a little bit dizzy from all the sugar. Yet the mere thought of cake made me queasy. I was done. I ate no more cake forever...or for the evening. Whatever.

With the donning of the jammies and the sliding between the sheets, I called an end to The Birthday Festivities and knew that my cake eating days were also over. Frankly, I couldn't see myself ever eating cake again. While I didn't finish the cake, I did make an impressive dent in it. I'm guessing it was designed to feed twenty or so, assuming you were doling out small, reasonably sized portions. I ate over half of it. Well over half. I dozed off believing that I might never eat cake again.

Now it is 7:06 on a Monday evening and I want cake. Again. Why I didn't just toss the thing away and be done with it? Was I really so foolish as to think that I was finished with cake? Could I really be so naive? Did it never occur to me that my tummy troubles were of a fleeting nature and that no one is ever really "over" cake?

Apparently not. I want cake again. And there is still cake in the fridge. I should not have cake as I ate too much of it over the weekend, believing that it was my birth(day)right. I could barely button my jeans this morning and almost had to call in sick instead of going to work because I didn't think wearing sweatpants would be professional.

Plus it was a "discount cake" and due to expire within mere hours of its purchase. Eating it now would probably kill me. Or, at the very least, cause me to have some sort of "incident" tomorrow morning and that is not the sort of thing you want to have happen when you teach middle school for a living. Or if you have eaten lots of blue frosting. There is no good scenario I can envision should I eat more of that cake...

I should probably just keep knitting away on that sleeve and ignore the fact that I have a blue frosted time bomb sitting in my refrigerator. That would definitely be the best course of action. I need to be strong. And toss that cake into the trash first thing in the morning then rush it out to the dumpster. I'm not going to do it now. I am already in my pj's and I don't want to venture outside. I probably wouldn't eat cake out of the trash can. But I'm still sort of flying high on the butter cream so I don't dare to make any promises. It is best to just leave the cake in the fridge for the time being. Just in case...

Thanks to all for the kind birthday wishes yesterday and today. It is sad to see a birthday end and it gave me no end of the glowing to keep getting "happy birthdays" throughout this day-after. It was like getting another whole day of birthday!

Which might mean I have to eat more cake...

SA

17 comments:

Knitting Linguist said...

You have to eat more cake. Bow to the inevitable. (And now I'm craving cake...) Happy birthday! ;)

Elaine said...

Happy Birthday!! (Sorry I missed the actual.) You can't *not* eat cake. It'll a whole 'nother year before you get another birthday cake of your very own. Enjoy!

Yarnhog said...

Oh, well, then let me say Happy Birthday!

Birthday calories don't count.

Kath said...

You know, the cake portion itself would probably be okay but it's that frosting that concerns me. Particularly the blue - that's a little scary.

I have a friend who is no longer allowed to drink anything blue. I'm sure you can imagine why.

Gail said...

http://www.statesymbolsusa.org/
National_Symbols/American_Hollidays.html
This is the website to see which American Food Holiday falls each day. Happy Belated Birthday (which fell on National Cherry Cobbler Day).

Mizzle said...

Don't worry about expiration dates... Sugar is a preservative!

That's how they make jam, after all... you take fruit, add sugar, and then it doesn't go bad for ages.

So really, that cake should be perfectly safe. :P

Mouse said...

Its a little late now but next time.. freeze a few pieces. That way once you start having cake withdrawal symptoms you still have a few pieces in reserve.

Anonymous said...

I had to laugh over the not going to work cuz you have nothing that fits.. hehehe... been there and almost called in one day just for that reason.

Thank God for skirts and dresses :)

Mia

Julie said...

It's now Tuesday morning; did you eat more cake? If not, what is wrong with you??????

trek said...

Great. It is not even nine in the morning and now I want to eat cake.

And it isn't my birthday.
Nor Number Guy's.
Nor Neatnik's.

I wonder what excuse I can make up for celebrating with cake? :: off to search the This Day In History Files::

trek said...

That's it: we can celebrate the Feast of St Dunstan!

Karen said...

I hope you ate the cake. There are children in (insert country name here) starving and they would love to eat your (insert food item here). Or that's what I was told as a kid when I wouldn't eat my dinner.

kmkat said...

Cake callings can penetrate even the strongest of refrigerator walls. I hope you took care of that bad boy so it won't be bothering you any more.

Oh, and cake NEVER goes bad. It gets stale, it gets hard and difficult to chew, but it NEVER goes bad.

Donna Lee said...

Birthday cake is my favorite. I always get a big one and am thoroughly sick of it when it's done. But then I have more cake when the next holiday comes along. I love cake.

Tanya said...

At my house we celebrate birthdays for at least a full week. We figure that if it takes 9 months to grow a human being a week is the LEAST acceptable amount of celebrating in honor of the anniversary of said birth.

I highly recommend adopting this practice. Happy b-day!

Teri S. said...

Happy belated birthday! Good luck with resisting the cake. Resistance is futile.

Carrie K said...

I feel it's your duty and responsibility to eat cake. Although technically, cake is merely a carrier for frosting and not in itself edible.

Happy Belated Birthday!