Thursday, January 31, 2008

Cute?

Look at this face.  I mean, really look at it.  



Take it alllll in...


Cute, right?  I realize that I might be a little bit biased.  She is, after all, my Big, Fluffy Kitty.  I suppose that, to others, she might not be quite as precious.  But even if you can't find it in your heart to see her perfection, you have to admit that she's pretty darned cunning.

(or, as we say it in these parts: wicked cunnin')

I have to admit, though, that I have never really credited the BFK with being the brightest of creatures.  To me, she has always been a rather simple being, one who lives simply for the love of her Mama and a good chin scratch.  She isn't all that graceful.  She falls down sometimes in her enthusiasm for getting from point A to point B.  She enjoys a good nosh, but has some difficulty eating from a bowl.  Her face has never quite fit her mouth and she needs to fling food to the floor then nose it around for a bit before getting it into a good position for munching.  
She has gigantic feet.  This adds to her general air of clownish clumsiness.  In short, she has always struck me as a wonderfully dopey kitty and is my joy because of it.

Cute can be deceptive.  I am beginning to wonder if this creature might just be some sort of diabolical genius.  If nothing else, she has mastered the art of working the room.  And the guilt.

Last summer, I observed there to be much more of my sweet kitty than I remembered.  Feeling horrible about allowing my poor girl to get so rotund, I promptly began a program of kitty aerobics and cut back on the crunchies.  I can't allow my baby to lose her girlish figure, after all!  She bore this indignity with more grace than I would have predicted.

In November, I began to come to a horrible realization, though.  The Big Fluffy Kitty wasn't really so much fat as she was felted.  As a double-coated cat, she requires a great deal of brushing and I swear to you I do this regularly.  Her outer coat was lovely.  Her Factory Undercoating had completely matted.  Up to an inch in places.  It all had to go.  From her little fanny to her midsection, vast amounts of fur needed to be painstakingly removed.  This left her with shoulder fur.  God help me, she looked like a football player...

She also bore this indignity with a certain amount of grace.  I'm a lucky mother.

Then one day, she became an "only cat."  This wasn't exactly planned and I probably wouldn't have explained it to her anyway.  As I mentioned earlier, I've never really thought she was a "deep thinker."  But suddenly she was all alone, bald and still smarting from all the kitty aerobics sessions.  I felt badly about that.  Really badly.  

I bought lots of new toys.  I started leaving the television on during the day so she would have some company.  (Cartoon Network is her favorite.)  I bought special treats.  And, when the guilt was especially close to the surface, I shared some of my own special treats.  Not a lot, mind you.  Just the occasional cracker.  Maybe a cheesy, puffy sort of thing every now and again.  And I may or may not have roasted some turkey for her.  If I did, (and I'm not admitting to anything here), I took off the skin and only gave her the white meat that she likes so much.  If I were to actually cross the line between "feeding your cat" and "cooking for your cat" that is probably the sort of thing I might have done.

What would you do?  Go back and look at that face, for heaven's sake!  I'm not make of stone, here!!!  She's just an innocent, little kitty who needs me to wait on her paw 'n claw...

But, I'm starting to wonder if I might be getting manipulated just a bit.  I'm not sure.  There is really no way to tell for certain, I suppose.  But I can tell you that a local store had some really yummy Cheerios Snack Mix on sale this week.  I got two bags for weekend munching.  I can also tell you that, when I opened the bag, a certain cute, fluffy someone appeared by my side as if by magic.  And while most kitties might be satisfied with one or two cheesy flavored Cheerios, mine was not.  When I wasn't looking, she stuck her whole head in the bag.  That is rather sneaky and not the behavior of an innocent creature.  It could just be an example of enthusiasm, I suppose.

But, as the final piece of evidence let me tell you this:  She snatched a piece right out of my hand.  Blatantly.  Flagrantly.  Without regard for possible consequences.  She showed no respect for me whatsoever.  

And she looked adorable the whole time.  She's either working off fewer cylinders than I originally thought or she is an evil genius.  I'm afraid to go to sleep tonight.

I'm hoping that she just wants me to knit her a pair of those cute, widdle baby sox I've been making so many of lately.  If this is not the case, then I may be in some trouble here.  

SA

25 comments:

Donna Lee said...

Cats are indeed cunning. They look so cute and almost innocent, especially when they're asleep, but then wham! Just when you're lulled into a false sense of security and your own superiority, they strike and take the food out of your mouth,er, hand. Thank god they don't have opposable thumbs or we would all be sleeping on the floor and they would have the beds. Although in my house, they take up more of the bed then they are entitled to already.

Emma said...

She's so imperious looking. I'm thinking she totally does not want a pair of kittie socks.

knitnzu said...

Now, that extra bit of white under the one eye makes her look diabolical! Donna Lee doesn't really know that cunnin' means cute and not smart! So I'm betting everybody from away is in the same boat. Were you hoping that folks would catch that word and think ms thing there to be brilliance and scintillation, more substance than all her diabolical cuteness??? And she looks like she'd eat the socks. Or chew your toes for making her the socks.

Beth said...

That's a pretty bold kitty you have there! Very cute, though. :)

trek said...

Number Guy says your cat is Dr Evil.

trek says your cat reminds me of another cat I once knew - a two-cylinder cat.

April said...

Yeah, once they start stealing the food from your hands, it's pretty much game over. Wilma once snaked a paw out and pulled all the toppings off a piece of pizza I was eating. She's had the best spot in the bed ever since.

Cathy said...

I won't even say a thing about M's cat Frisko who has switched loyalties and is my cat Gato. Only when one of us has food.

Wicked cunning. Must be especially available on models with the double coat and white mustache.

Leigh said...

Well, it's all very simple. In her mind, you owe her big time!

Mel said...

Um, yeah. You know there's a little lecture I give people about letting their pets train them instead of the other way around.

catsmum said...

I vote for evil genius :]

Jeanne said...

One of mine thinks it's okay to stick his head in whatever I'm drinking no matter how many emphatic "no's" I proclaim. I say knit the widdle socks for her before it's too late!

Anonymous said...

Competition at the snack bar can't be all bad. Makes for a trimmer sheep, and a more fluffy B.F.K. Just wait until she sees what Mommy and Daddy sheep have sent you for Valentines Day. It is in a good size box.
M.S.

Anonymous said...

Cute kitty. I think she's not as smart as you worry she may be because if she was that smart you'd have no idea that she was planning to take over your world.
Good luck.
Karen
http://nothingbutknit.blog-city.com/

crzjane said...

She is cute, she is adorable. But like most cats, she is probably very cunning. You might want to lock the bedroom door tonight. With her on the other side. Just saying....
Maybe if you put a bit of catnip in one of those cute wee socks you might be safe.
cj

The Kelly Green Rogue said...

oooh, how sneaky of her! My dogs are the same way, hiding all that cunning with adorable looks. LOL

Cursing Mama said...

cunning & devious - two words I apply to the cat and the kids - I believe you may begin using them at your house now too

Also - I swear her eye brows look like glasses - she always looks so smart to me.

Ronni said...

I took one look at that picture and thought "evil genius" right away. Long before I got to the examples that proved it. I'm pretty darn sure you're being played.

Still, she's pretty good at it apparently and so I figure she deserves what she manages to get.

Knitting Linguist said...

I think that if she is a cat, then the evil genius thing is a given. I say this as a cat owner. Be scared. Be very scared...

PICAdrienne said...

Twisted Cheetos is what that kitty wants. Yeah, we have a little guy, and he looks oh so sweet. My aching...hindquarters, he is sweet. Ours is a gray and white male...but the same MO.

The ones that seem kind of dumb, and a bit klutzy, watch out for them, evil genius is right.

Army_Wifey08 said...

umm...If I were you I would watch myself...BFK facial expressin in that picture looks like she's saying "Take the picture...c'mon I dare you...I know were you sleep...And you dont know where I hide the beans."

I think she likes beans so she puts them in your cupboard so she can have some.

mehitabel said...

Awww, that's a wicked cunnin' little face! And I don't trust it a bit, either. My BFK needs to go on a diet (he's not felted--I checked--it's the Little Long-haired Kitty who felts, especially when he tangles with the flypaper) but those big eyes... He has no qualms about waking me at 3 or 4 or 5 am when he suddenly needs a top-up in the lovin' department!

MRMacrum said...

I look at that face and I see diabolical. Behind those cute eyes and whiskers placed just so is a mind bent on sabotage, insurgencies, and undermining the smooth operation of the culture it lives in.

I know this because I have 7 of the little troublemakers. They are always planning some new mischief. But I guess it's worth it when one settles down on my belly and I can feel their purring down to my feet.

Veggies.... said...

Aaaaahhhh....that's why they are in a class far, far above the canine world!!! One smart kitty you have there and cute, doesn't even come close to describing her beauty!!! WHat a P's thoughts on rye bread? Mr. C and Ms. M just LOVE it. Strange but true.

Huggs....

knitseashore said...

An adorable face has the BFK. I'm sure that she is actually very clever and the takeover of your home had begun long before you started to become aware of it. :)

Lynne said...

Sign in the window of the RSPCA Shelter: "Dogs have families, cats have servants."