Komputer Karma

When I was in high school we were all living in a pretty low tech sort of time. Despite this, my school did manage to procure a few of the latest and greatest in computers. They were cumbersome, clunky things that really did very little except glow menacingly and make us all wonder if we were looking at our future overlords. These weren't your fancy-schmancy laptops of today that bring us our daily dose of email and "enhancement" offers. Still, we were pretty lucky to have them given the day and age.

We were also pretty lucky to have this new and amazing thing called a photocopier. No more were teachers rushing off to class carrying a stack of mimeographed pages and a smeared master in their purple tinged fingers. Elementary schools were a bit late in getting this particular equipment update, though. We were still using mimeograph machines when I was student teaching. One day someone in my dorm pointed out that I had somehow managed to get the ink on my tongue. To this day, I can't tell you how I managed to do that, but my tongue remained purple for almost twenty four hours and was the subject of much speculation, most of which cannot be discussed on this, a family style sort of blog.

One of the classes I took in high school required that we spend some time doing simple programming with the behemoths that represented the height of technology back then. It wasn't anything fancy. We just needed to be able to get the computer to solve for "x" as in a simple algebraic equation. I don't remember much about algebra, but I surely do remember my fascination with the concept of an "if/then" command. All you had to do was use the right series of words and symbols to get the computer to understand what to do if certain circumstances were in play. If. Then. Simple and to the point. I wasn't so good at math. But I got the idea behind: "if" this is happening, "then" do this.

If/Then has a few real-life applications even today. We see it all the time. To use a recent example from the Life And Times Of The Sheep:

If it looks like rain...

Then you should close the windows.

Nice!!! If, that is, you happen to remember to close the windows. If not, then it goes something like this:

If you forget to close the windows when it looks like rain...

Then you will have very wet carpets.

Not so nice. But, it really supports the If/Then principle.

Here's another one:

If you publicly declare your hatred for your knitting and your intention to abandon it and henceforth work only in Popsicle stick sculptures...

Then Frecklegirl will send an email to tell you that Ravelry has decided it cannot live without you.

Figures. I am SheepishAnnie. Please, I beg of you, consider being my friend. I am not going to be the best of Ravelers what with my Popsicle stick commitment and general tendency towards disorganization. My notebook is not exactly the place you will be going for great project ideas and insights on how to become a better knitter. But I'm there after languishing on the waiting list since July and am determined to enjoy the experience. I don't need to be the most popular girl at the dance. But, my self-esteem will suffer greatly if I don't make a friend in there somewhere. Think of it this way:

If Sheepie thinks that people are looking at her stuff on Ravelry...

Then she will feel guilty enough to keep the place looking nice enough for company.

SA