My new friend, The Horrible, Terrible Cold and I would like to welcome you to the Wednesday Night bullet post. I am currently pretending that the cold is my friend and that I love having it around. I think that this will confuse it enough to make it lose confidence in itself. Then it will have to go on a retreat somewhere in the mountains and leave me alone. It's a theory, but I think it will pan out pretty well.
Meanwhile, here are your Wednesday Night Bullet Points:
* The cold got the better of me today.
*Frankly, getting up at 2:00 in the morning to keep it company kind of took the wind out of my sails.
*Since I was fully staffed in the classroom and short by one (but very key) student, I decided to take my leave.
*It took me over an hour to get out the door, but I eventually made it back to my bed.
*I don't necessarily feel any better for having done it, but it was worth a shot.
*There is no scientific proof to support the healing properties of napping with a big, fat cat.
*But I don't think it hurt...
*I had to stay late last night for Parent/Teacher Conferences. Again.
*Except I didn't have any conferences scheduled so I mostly spent the time talking with the custodian about how to plan for The Coming Days Of Hardship and The Art Of Stockpiling Dry Goods.
*When I wasn't doing that, I was downstairs talking with Mrs. Secretary Who Sits At The Back Desk about Zombie Survival Strategies.
*Neither of them wanted to talk about my cold, so that kind of limited the range of topics...
*Funny thing about being up at 2:00. You get to see stuff.
*I know that it is the Very Complicated Kitty who is tearing up the wallpaper.
*I know this for two reasons.
*First, before he came...I had intact wallpaper.
*Second, I have seen him do it.
*But last night, I was able to witness a certain Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty taking a strip down for his general amusement.
*They are a team.
*Not my team. But a team, nonetheless.
*I did not bring my knitting with me last night.
*Also didn't knit today after I got home because I felt that this would take valuable time away from my scheduled moaning, sniffling and whimpering.
*Best Conversation Of The Day:
Ms. Sheep (to the Cheerful Teaching Assistant) ...so that brings us to the present. Do you have any questions? Have I covered the progression of my cold symptoms in enough detail or would you like me to go back and paint a more vivid picture for you? It's no trouble. I have the time.
Cheerful Teaching Assistant: Er...
(the boy who is) Dark & Disturbed: (ambling into the classroom and presenting his tardy slip): Hey. I'm here. Sorry I'm late. I think I have a cold. I'm kind of sneezing and...
MS: Oh, no you don't, Mister!!! This is MY moment. I am the sickly one. You just get started on your Language Arts worksheet and don't bother the grown-ups. I am about to describe in exacting detail how I plan to begin nasal irrigation later today and I don't think anyone wants to miss that.
(The CTA assumes an expression that is a cross between mild horror and sad resignation. However, as Ms. Sheep is essentially her boss, she says nothing.)
D&D: Sorry. I was just saying that I had a cold...
MS: Enough! You are always saying you're sick and I never get to be the sick one. You list symptoms every single day and we have to listen patiently. It's not fair!!!
D&D: I'm a Type I Diabetic.
MS: Well....yeah. I guess there's that.
*Fortunately, D&D, for all his goth tendencies, is a kind-hearted boy with a deep appreciation for patently absurd conversations.
*And a genuine affection for his sickly, whining teacher.
*The CTA was pleased to hear that I'd finished Switched (Trylle Trilogy, Book 1).
*But is anxious for me to get cracking on Torn (Trylle Trilogy, Book 2).
*I'm almost done. Soon, I shall be immersed in Ascend (Trylle Trilogy, #3).
*Then my teaching assistant can finally have someone with whom to discuss these books.
*The wait is killing her and I need to get a move on before she gives away the entire plot line.
*This is proving difficult because I found another series and it is sort of difficult to not get seduced away.
*The Devil You Know (Felix Castor)
*Great fun with a side of creepy.
"Normally, I wear a czarist army greatcoat-the kind that sometimes gets called a paletot-with pockets sewn in for my tin whistle, my notebook, a dagger and a chalice. Today I'd gone for a green tuxedo with a fake wilting flower in the buttonhole, pink patent-leather shoes, and a painted-on mustache in the style of Groucho Marx. From Bunhill Fields in the east, I rode out across London-the place of my strength. I have to admit, though, that "strong" wasn't exactly how I was feeling; when you look like a pistachio-ice-cream sundae, it's no easy thing to hang tough."
*That. Is. Awesome.
*As is the rest of the book. But I feel badly. Sort of like I cheated on the CTA...
*To make matters worse, The Dark and Hollow Places. Carrie Ryan is waving warmly at me from the online bookstore.
*But, for the CTA, I shall stay the course. No more side trips. Besides, I'm sort of curious to see how things work out for Princess Wendy and the trolls...
*No naps, cats or reading tomorrow, though. Gotta go back to school and see what's left of the place after a day without me.
Well, I see by the clock on the wall and the growing pile of tissues at my feet that it is time for a dose of cold medications. I might even treat myself to the Sleepy Kind. You know...just as a little gift for the cold that keeps on giving. Meanwhile, I trust that you all are having a pleasant Wednesday and are free from any viral complications. If you need me, I'll just be here on the couch thinking healthy thoughts.
Neil and me.
3 hours ago