High Expectations And Low Productivity

Several years ago, I happened to wear a pair of fingerless mitts when I went in to see The World's Greatest Stylist And Life Coach.  She was rather taken with them.  In fact, she actually did take them for a few minutes.  She does that with the knitted stuff sometimes.  She'll "try them on" and then prance away, requiring that another stylist wrangle her back to the main desk so that my property can be returned.

I take it as a compliment...

At any rate, she asked me to make her a pair of these rather simple mitts and I did so willingly.  I happen to like TWGSALC and want her to remain on the Sheepish Team.  I whipped up a pair and she's worn them for years.  That is, until recently.

At my last appointment, she said that she lost one of them.  She was rather dejected about it and was hoping that I might consider making her another pair.  Of course, I agreed.  As previously noted...we need her on the team.

Ironically, I've been meaning to make her more of the things for years.  However, each time the holidays roll around, I find that I've gotten myself into the Bigger, Better And With 26% More Stuff Spiral.  You know what I mean.

It starts with a simple idea.  Like making a plain pair of fingerless mitts.  Basic stuff.  Doesn't even have a gusset for the thumb.  Easy Peasy!  But that doesn't quite seem like...enough.  There should probably be a gusset.  Knitters who have taken the time to advance their skills should be gusseting, after all!  Yes! The mitts shall be gusseted!

With that matter settled, one might think it is a done deal.  But no!  Once in the grip of Bigger And Better, one is not likely to escape so easily.  Suddenly, the thought process starts to spin like a tornado and everything in its path gets sucked into the planning.

There should probably be some cables, too!  And maybe some bobbles!  I mean...I've never actually made a bobble, but how hard could that be?  And speaking of bobbles, maybe there should be some baubles as well!  And sequins!  And I'll bet that glitter glue stuff would look cool!  Now where did I put my Bedazzler?  I'm certain that it's around her somewhere...faux gems would be just the thing.  Oh, and they definitely need wi-fi...

The mitts never get done.  Once you get to the point where you are considering where to put the satellite dish, you've really gone too far to ever see the end of the project.  Hence, I've given TWGSALC a scarf every year.  It's never been my intention.  It's just that it's all I have the energy for once the mitt madness passes.  Granted, they have been nice scarves.  But still...

There was no scarf option this year, though.  The request was specific and I agreed to it.  In front of witnesses.  I needed to make the mitts.  I felt the madness kicking in while on the drive home from my hair appointment.  It was a near thing, but I was able to get a grip by uttering one simple sentence:

That is not what she wants.

She wanted the simple, non-gusseted, plain and so-totally-not-gem-encrusted mitts.  I could do that.  I could do it very quickly and easily.  It was just a matter of remembering what she wants.

So that's what I did.

Ok..so maybe I added just a little bit of extra floofy yarn.  I'm only human, for God's sake!!

Mitts look dumb when they aren't on a hand.  But it's kind of hard to take a picture of your own hand...

They do not have 3G speed, but they were done in less than a week and with very little of the usual procrastinating.  There is something to be said for keeping it simple, I suppose.  I honestly don't know what I'll do with all the extra time...

I'm thinking that I might make another pair.  I have this idea for laser beams that would really make a statement!

SA

WNBP: The Pre-Turkey Edition

It is Wednesday, but not the regular kind.  This was the sort where I don't have to go to work and I spend the day creating yeast-based baked goods.  In fact, there are a couple of loaves rising merrily away as I type and I shall soon have to go attend to them.  However, I still think I can manage the Wednesday Night Bullet Post while all that is going on.  I am nothing if not a multi-tasker.

*I have today off because I get comp. time for the extra hours we put into parent/teacher conferences.


*I didn't bake bread all day.


*I actually put it off all day and now I have to bake bread at the last minute.


*Don't judge me.  I've baked a lot of bread lately.


*I thought I might make more, but I do not see that happening.  


*Frankly, I'm sort of impressed that I made it this far.


*Three dozen rolls and four loaves of the beloved Cheesy Bread.


*I made my name in the Sheepish family with the Cheesy Bread.


*I used to just be Mommy and Daddy Sheep's daughter.


*Now when the family gathers, they ask, "Is Sheepie coming?  And is she bringing the bread?"


*I have found my niche...


*I have also been told that I may not attend certain functions if I do not have Cheesy Bread upon my person.


*I finished two pairs of fingerless mitts today.


*This more than makes up for my delayed bread baking.


*Except for the part where people are expecting bread tomorrow at the family feast and probably couldn't care less about mitts.


*Wait...I need to go check those last two loaves.  Hold on a minute...


*Yup.  She's risen.  Time to preheat that oven!


*Everybody think good thoughts for not-burned-bread!


*This recipe takes milk and I've used the last of it so I don't have a back up plan here.


*It's been very cold lately.  Especially at night.


*Someone alert Webster's.  We have a new definition of "love."

The willingness to share one's favorite pink blankie with another

*I love my Other Favorite Librarian.


*When I mentioned how much I enjoyed Garth Nix's Keys To The Kingdom series and that I was planning on purchasing the next few books so I could see what happened next, she took action.


*And used proceeds from the school book fair to buy them!


*And readied them for check-out ahead of the other books!


*And hand-delivered them unto me Monday afternoon!


*Now I've read Lady Friday (Keys to the Kingdom, Book 5) and have Superior Saturday (The Keys To The Kingdom) on deck!


*Truth be told, having days Monday through Thursday in the library and not the rest of the week seemed kind of cruel, but I don't like to judge.  I'm just glad to have the rest of them now!


*I wanted Scumble but I asked her to give that one to the Cheerful Teaching Assistant because she is sad about misplacing her e-reader and I felt like she deserved it.


*I got The White Horse Trick instead.  


*Kate Thompson also wrote The New Policeman (Costa Children's Book Award (Awards)), a book I rather enjoyed.  I think I'll be happy with this one.


*And I can bask in the glow of a good deed.


*Da Boyz are wrestling.  They careened into the Automated Kitty Distractor and somehow turned it on.


*Neither one seems to have noticed, but it scared the holy heck out of me.


*I was highly amused when a colleague came to tell me that she is taking the same medication as the Very Complicated Kitty.


*She wanted to know how I got the medication so cheaply.


*My cat has referred her to the same prescription program that he uses.


*My life is beyond weird.  I sometimes can't even think about it for too long because I get a weird floaty feeling and think I'm going to faint.


*My medication has gone up ten bucks.  It does not qualify for the same program as my cat's.


*Seriously.  I can't stand it.  It makes me go all floaty...


*Wait...gonna go check the bread again.  I'm worried about my bread...


*It's fine.  I think I'm just being a little paranoid, is all.



I think that about covers it.  The bread is fine, the cats are fine and I will be fine as soon as I know that the bread is done and ready for tomorrow.  If you happen to be among those celebrating Thanksgiving, I wish you a very, very happy one.  I plan on enjoying mine with great gusto and consuming my own body mass in stuffing.  If you aren't on the Thanksgiving Diet Plan tomorrow, fear not.  There is no law against indulging on a Thursday and you don't need a reason at all.

Just don't touch my stuffing.  You can have the squash.  That's fine.  And feel free to have an extra slice of bread.  I've made plenty!

SA

Not Crochet, But Very Spunky!

I promised Spunky Girl that I would teach her how to crochet on Friday.  That is when the good little boys and girls in my class get to take a day of semi-rest and it seemed like an opportune time to do this.  She's already mastered quilting courtesy of The Cheerful Teaching Assistant and it only seemed right that I impart my own bit of wisdom unto the child.

I did my best.  I truly did.  But, for some reason, poor Spunky Girl just couldn't seem to get the hang of it.  She never got frustrated, bless her little heart.  She kept at it all day.  In spite of this, she never even managed to figure out how to do the foundation chain.  She just couldn't help but wind the yarn around the hook a few times before looping it through and a vein in my head began to throb each time I saw this.  I tried everything I could think of.  I showed her.  I explained it.  I made up cute little sayings to represent the process.  I put my gnarled, withered old hands over her little flawless ones and helped her to do the right movements.  Nothing.

By late morning, I was joking about taping her thumbs down to keep them out of the way.  By early afternoon, I was still saying it jokingly, but almost kind of meaning it.  The Boy With The Bass Booming Earbuds commented, "If you just keep saying it, but never actually do it, how is she going to learn?"

I stopped saying it for two reasons.  First, it is never a good idea to tape a student's thumbs in place even if it is well intended.  That never plays well in the media.  Secondly, The Cheerful Teaching Assistant was starting to refer to me as The Crochet Nazi.  I took that as a sign and backed off.

It didn't matter much to Spunky Girl by then anyway.  She'd discovered that her attempt at chaining was resulting in something she rather liked.  She declined further lessons from the benevolent Ms. Sheep and merrily looped the yarn awkwardly until she had a very stretchy string of great length.  She decided it was a belt.  I suggested that she might put a few beads on the end for a funky touch and my reputation as a craftsperson was redeemed.

She made her cute little belts for the rest of the day.  Even the boys were impressed.  I have decided to pretend that I taught her this and let it be a part of my legacy from this day forth.  If she makes her first million making beaded yarn belts, I expect some sort of remuneration.  I think that this seems quite right and proper.

I probably should see about teaching her to knit sometime soon.  That seems like the next logical addition to my ever-growing and shining legacy.  I'm sure it will all go swimmingly...

SA

WNBP: Mavens Like Me

Wednesday is upon us once again and it is time for the Wednesday Night Bullet Post.  I think we can dispense with my usual commentary on how hard it is to remember the day of the week and the gratitude I feel on those days when I can post in random bullet form.  I think we all know that by now, right?

Let's get straight to the highlights:

*It was raining this morning.


*And by "raining," I do not mean a gentle patter of soft drops that made the morning sparkle like it was taking a diamond shower.


*I mean a pelting, harsh punishment from the sky that caused rivers to form on all surfaces.


*I had to take out the trash and get some gas this morning.  


*Soggy Sheepie...


*The Boy For Whom All The World's A Stage took one look at me, sighed happily and said:


I just love it when Ms. Sheep gets caught in the rain.  It makes her hair dark and that looks so much better on her, don't you think?


*I spent the rest of the day in a dither because I am way too invested in what the average middle school student thinks of my hair coloring choices...


*Yesterday was a short work day for me.  I had a doctor's appointment.


*What follows is what I consider an appropriate response to a greeting that includes the words, "how are you today?"


*I apparently feel it is perfectly rational to throw my hands in the air and announce, "I am going to write the story of my life and it will be titled: I Used To Be Smart But Then Menopause Came And Made Me Stoopit."


*The doctor assures me that this state of affairs is temporary and that I will one day be the witty, brilliant gal I used to was.


*If you are ever tempted to tell someone this, please know...


*IT DOES NOT HELP.


*I went on to describe how stoopit I have become.


*I also put forth my theory that women who are thrown into this horrific state of affairs at the tender age of 40 thanks to a poorly-timed illness should be given some sort of reduced symptoms benefit.


*Then I informed her that a time limit should be established and some order instilled in the process. You start, you deal with it for a predetermined period of time, then you are done.


*IF YOU WANT TO BE HELPFUL, WHY DON'T YOU GET ON THAT, M'KAY???


*Then she shook her head sadly and asked me a lot of questions about how I was functioning at work.  She also reviewed my file and the state of my bone density, which is getting neither better nor worse but is still depressing to think about.


*Next visit, I plan on just saying, "Hello, Doc.  I'm fine today.  How are you?"


*I think I was just grumpy because I forgot my knitting.


*And haz the menopause...


*In spite of all that, I'm still making decent progress on the mitts I'm knitting for the World's Greatest Stylist And Life Coach.


*I had to explain what the word "maven" meant to (the boy who is) Dark And Disturbed during the last class today.


*Then he stood up, threw out his chest, put his hands on his hips and loudly proclaimed, "I'm the MAVEN, that's how I know!!!!!"


*This somehow devolved into our someday going into business together and selling t-shirts that read: Quoth The MAVEN, "That's How I Know!!!"


*Why this was so funny, I have no idea.  But we darned near had to call the nurse before we died of mirth.


*I finished Heroes of the Valley over the weekend.  I know I said I really liked it before.


*Now I'm saying that I looooove it!!!  


*I'm really glad that my cousin brought The Little Stranger with her when she came to visit my parents last summer.


*I'm sorry that she couldn't get into it.  Or that my mom couldn't either.


*But I'm giddy that it found its way to me because I thought it rather good!


*Sort of an updated version of a classic, Gothic ghost story.  Slow in places, granted.  But nicely done.


*When I was at the school book fair last week I sort of got overwhelmed and panicked a bit.  I couldn't decide what I wanted!!!


*Then I ended up buying something I probably didn't really want. But it was too late and I was stuck with it.


*Turns out I am kind of fascinated by The Everafter.  It's like The Lovely Bones only less with the murder and more with the "what does it all mean?"


*Way more compelling than I thought it was going to be.  


*I'm saving the best one for last.  It's the reason I went to the book fair.  I was only going to buy one book.  But then I got all the others because that is sometimes the way these things go...


*I'll tell you all about it later.  I'm treating myself to it over Thanksgiving break.


*I really wanted Scumble (the sequel to Savvy) but it was kind of spendy in hardcover.


*I'll wait for My Other Favorite Librarian to get it for the school library and read it for free.  


*Much more sensible way to go about it, right?


*If I'm going to be selling super-cool MAVEN t-shirts, I should probably start acting smarter.  


*Even if I am not exactly biologically capable of that right now...



That's about it for this week's bullet points, I think.  I'm assuming I could come up with more if I tried, but I think I've wound down for the moment.  I'll just kick back and enjoy the evening (especially now that it's not pouring buckets down upon me).  I trust that your Wednesday went well for you and wish you all the joys of an impending Thursday.

I may be a stoopit kind of MAVEN, but even I know that Thursday is just a heartbeat away from the weekend.  And that's a joyful thing, indeed!

SA

At Last...Proof Of Knitting!

I commend you for your patience over the past few weeks.  To hear me go on and on about all the needle wielding but show nothing to prove it must have been draining for you.  In fact, you probably had a few sleepless nights over it.  I can only imagine you tossing and turning in your bed thinking, "That Sheepie...she is either a sociopathic liar or deluded on a level that requires some sort of intervention.  However will I deal with this most distressing turn of events?"

I am sorry about all that lack of snooze time.  Truly.  However in certain situations, discretion is required and we both had to make sacrifices.  You lost precious REM sleep and I my good name.  But that is all behind us now, for I can throw off the cloak of secrecy and shine the light of truth upon my knitting reality!

First up, we have...

Sweet little booties

And then there's...

Bibs for dribblin'

Are you starting to see a pattern here?  If not, here's one more clue...

A wee, little kimono sweater

Yeah...that's right.  You heard me.  "Wee."  And no.  I am not pregnant.  I'm a talented individual, but not so brilliant that I can outwit the basics of middle age biology, thankyouverymuch.  It is Niece Sheep who is soon to be presenting the family with another little lambie and rumors of a baby shower started circulating a while back.  It seemed like a good idea to knit something.  So I did.  And yesterday, we showered the incoming little feller so now I can finally show you the fruits of my needles.

It was a lovely event, made all the better by a trip to Mommy and Daddy Sheep's house for lunch prior to.  And Mommy Sheep even suggested a quick field trip to a nearby yarn shop before we headed out for all the showering!  As we pulled into the parking lot and I saw the words "Gift Shop" on the sign next to the promised yarn, I did a bit of a mental eye roll.  I envisioned a few shelves of the woolly stuff hidden in the back and only reachable by navigating through forty seven aisles of plastic novelty items.

Not so.

Rosemary's Yarn Shop has one of the best selections I've seen in a very long time.  And it goes on and on and on!  Just when you think you've reached the end, you see another room just out of the corner of your eye.  They even have a small selection of spinning wool!

Mommy Sheep decided that this might be a good time to celebrate an early...something or other so new great nephew Sheep wasn't the only one gifted yesterday.  At some point, I'll see about getting some pictures up.  For now, just know that much in the way of sheep hair is now here with me at the manse.  Thank you, Mommy Sheep!!!

Lest you think it's been all about babies and mothers gifting their children, I have done something more grown up.  I managed to improve upon the sad, crocheted rectangle mitts I showed you the other day.  My pride demanded that I do something, after all!

A distinct improvement 

I'll eventually get around to posting the pattern for these.  Suffice it to say, they were not difficult and I'm probably going to do another pair for gift giving.  If nothing else, they help to restore my tattered reputation after all that blathering about supposed knitting and crocheting of rectangles.

Phew!  I feel better now.  The secrecy was really starting to get to me.  The good news is that I'm now warmed up for the holiday knitting and was able to start on the mitts my stylist requested without too much procrastinating and whining.

Of course, holiday knitting probably means more secrecy.  I'm not sure if I can take it...

SA

WNBP: Yup. It Is.

I find that the best course of action in certain circumstances is to just act like it all went the way it was supposed to.  For example, if you happen to neglect the Wednesday Night Bullet Post because you were at parent-teacher conferences, you should simply post the WNBP and defy anyone to say that it wasn't there all along.  If you believe it yourself, it almost becomes true.

Hence, I shall proceed with all the confidence of one who is absolutely correct and right and just and good.  I'm great at denial.  It keeps me employed and makes bill collectors go away...

*I spent most of last night down in the office showing Mrs. Secretary Who Sits At The Back Desk how to crochet those funky little sideways mitts I posted the other day.


*I almost missed my one conference because I was enjoying myself so much down there.


*I sat at the desk belonging to Mrs. Secretary Who Sits At The Front Desk and she doesn't use a regular chair.


*She uses one of those bouncy balls.  Great fun!


*And surprisingly comfortable.  Even when sitting and crocheting for three or so hours.


*Back didn't hurt at all until I went upstairs to my own room to do a conference and had to sit in a regular chair.


*Very tired by 8:00.  Very, very tired because parent-teacher conference night is long.  


*You teach for half a day.  Then you conference (or sit around) until 8:00.


*Long day.  


*But productive since I made a pair of mitts and conned the lady in the tech office into letting me install an upgrade on my school laptop.


*Now I can watch streaming television again as God and the taxpayers intended.


*My own laptop is still dead.  She took pity on me.  


*That or she was tired of listening to my lamenting and whatnot.


*In addition to denial, I am very good with the lamenting.


*Hey, I'm wondering.  Was anyone else up at 3:30 this morning steaming a pumpkin?


*I'm curious because I hate to think I was the only one.


*Those of you who were up at 3:30 steaming a pumpkin already know why one might do this.


*For the rest of you, one does this in order that it might be peeled.


*Pie pumpkins are for peeling.  And smooshing up.  Then freezing for pumpkin bread later.


*I don't recommend steaming pumpkins at 3:30 in the morning unless you happen to be wide awake anyway and looking for something productive to do.  


*Daddy Sheep is rolling around on the floor howling with laughter now because I am turning into Mommy Sheep.


*It is not a good idea to steam anything at 3:30 in the morning if it is a regular school day.


*OK if it's a holiday, though.


*Happy Veteran's Day.  Go thank a veteran.


*Don't go randomly hugging them, though.  They find that a bit forward and off-putting unless you happen to already be on hugging terms.


*I also made goulash.


*Did that later, though.  Not at 3:30.  I couldn't because I was out of paprika.


*Oh!  I know what I wanted to tell you!  I went to the school book fair last night!


*Proceeds to benefit the library.  


*Parent Support Organization provides a five dollar voucher good for the purchase of a book to every single student in the school.  All of them.


*Which is an amazing gesture and one that every kid takes advantage of.  Love that.


*I spent more than I should have, but I love my school library.  And books.


* I read InterWorld quickly.  It's a short one.  


*Good book.  Not regular Neil Gaiman good since it's a collaboration and all.  But still good.


*Then I started Heroes of the Valley by Jonathan Stroud.  I can't quite think of the word I'm looking for to describe it.


*Hmmm...it's on the tip of my tongue.


*Oh yes!  I have it!


*WOW.


*Strongly recommend this one.  Even if you aren't a fan of YA lit.  Just trust me.  


*WOW.


*Before I went to the book fair, I re-read In the Night Room by Peter Straub.  Love that one, too.


*I have to go check on the rice steamer now.


*Rice goes well with goulash.


*Starting to realize that I've done a lot of steaming today...


*Maybe I should fry something.  Just for a change of pace, you see.


*Not tonight, though.  Also not at 3:30 tomorrow morning.


*I have to go back to school for a day.  


*Downside of a Thursday holiday.


*If it was Thursday.  Which it's not.


*Because, as I've already said, I wrote this on Wednesday and you just missed it.  Or Blogger was slow. Or the internet was broken.


*Pick your story.  I'm fine with whatever works best for you.


Well, there you go!  A Wednesday Night Bullet Post right on schedule.  Don't look at me like that.  You aren't going to sway me on this.  I've got my life under control and nothing is slipping through the cracks.  Not here.  Nothing but trains running on time and pumpkins being steamed at normal, ordinary hours of the day.

I believe that.

SA

By The Pricking Of My Thumbs...

No, nothing wicked this way comes.  At least nothing I can see galloping over the horizon yelling, "Yoo-hoo!  Sheepie!  I'm a-comin' for ya!  Didn't you get the message I left on your thumbs?

(I am planning a post detailing the recent tortures visited upon me by the resident felines, not the least of which being their reaction to the setting back of the clocks last night.  To start one's Sunday at 3:30 in the godforsaken morning in order that the intricacies of Daylight Savings Time might be explained is unpleasant.  It also doesn't do much to convince them that breakfast time isn't right around the corner.  But that is another post for another day...)

No, I am actually going to present you with something of a unique and almost happy nature.  Here on this very fiber-blog, I am going to display for all the world to see....A FINISHED OBJECT!!!!

Yes, that's right.  I finished something.  Actually, I have finished a lot of stuff lately, but none of it is the kind of knitting that is bloggable at the moment.  Today, however, I can proudly display a morning's work and not have to hide in the shadows over the matter.

Frankly, I think the whole thing deserves a great, big TAH-DAHHHHHHH!

::sound of crickets chirping::

The blogoshpere falls silent for a moment and then can be heard the sounds of uncomfortable shuffling and throat-clearing.  This is followed by general muttering and whispers:


"I'm not doing it!"


"Well somebody has to say it."


"I did it last time!"


"You're ever so much better at this sort of thing..."


At last, a reluctant member of the crowd is shoved forward.  


"Um...Sheepie?  That's nice and all.  But it kind of looks like you just crocheted a rectangle, turned it sideways and stitched up part of the sides.  Then you stuck it on your hand.  Not that we're judging or anything, mind you.  It just sort of seems like, skill-wise, you've taken a few steps backwards.  Maybe...a little...um...


OK.  Yes.  It is a rectangle.  But I can explain.  If you can just give me a minute to explain is all!  See, the first thing is that I've been knitting a whole lot over the past few weeks and a great deal of that has been with cotton.  I have knit so much, in fact, that I have worn a hole in my thumb.  Yes, that's right.  My thumb!  I'll bet you feel all kinds of bad now dontcha, Judgy McJudgerson?

Actually, I knit a little rough patch onto my thumb and then picked at the skin until I tore a piece off and that hurts something wicked.  But this is a "six of one, half a dozen of another" kind of situation, I think...

Either way, I'm off the knitting train until my thumb grows new fingerprints and whatnot.  I'm thinking this will last at least until I can wash my hands without my thumb feeling like it's on fire.  Crochet seemed like a logical thing to do and I also have another very good reason for crocheting a rectangle. Or two.

I had an appointment with The World's Greatest Stylist And Life Coach yesterday.  I could tell when I walked in that she had a few things on her mind.  The first was that she recently lost one of the fingerless mitts I knit for her a while back and that it is greatly missed.  She was wondering if I might do another pair.  I agreed quickly because a good stylist and life coach is not the sort of thing that comes along every day.  You knit mitts for these people.  This agreement was, of course, before I decided to flay my own thumb, but I have a month to heal before my next appointment so I should be in good shape.

The other thing she wished to discuss was crochet.  She learned as a wee little thing at her grandmother's knee back in China, (or something like that) but has forgotten how.  She thought she might like to take it up again and was wondering if I might do a quick refresher lesson sometime.  Again, I weighed the value of a day out of my weekend against the whole stylist/life coach thing and came up firmly on the side of Okey-Dokey!

Since she likes fingerless mitts and will probably need a simple project to fire up the old motor memory, I figured a sample done up in baby-type yarn would be a good thing to drag along as a prototype.  So that's why I'm crocheting rectangles and acting like it's a good thing.  See?  I told you I could explain this!

Actually, I sort of don't hate them.  I'm even thinking that, as project go, they are kind of a quick-fix, instant-gratification thing.  I might even do a more fancified version to toss into the Oh-My-God-The-Holidays-Are-Coming pile.  This will also keep me busy while my thumb heals.

Of course, I'll probably wear a hole in my pinky finger or something, but I don't think that rhymes with anything that will bring wickedness down upon me...

SA

WNBP: On A Wednesday

I am the first one to admit that I sometimes have difficulty tracking the days. What can I say?  I take a while to get settled into the morning and what the next ten or so hours will bring. I do, however, often brag about my ability to discern Wednesday from the bunch.  That day is like a shining star, if only because I know it is the day of the Wednesday Night Bullet Post.

Not so today.  I woke up convinced it was Thursday.  Maybe even Friday!  You can only imagine my disappointment upon realizing the truth.  The only thing worse than today's sadness was yesterday's because that was when I thought it was at Wednesday.  You can see how I might be feeling a little out of sorts right about now.

Why don't I just start tossing out the bullet points?  That might cheer me up...


*We had an evacuation drill at school today.


*This event entails our rounding up over 500 people and trudging them down the street to the elementary school because it is important that we practice what to do in the event of an emergency.


*Small school, yes.  But still a lot of folks to wrangle when the majority of them are middle schoolers.


*We usually do this earlier in the year, but rain and state mandated testing forced us to put it off until the temperatures hovered around the freezing mark.


*A delightful thing to be doing at 8:30 in the morning.


*On a Wednesday.


*That, by all rights, should have been a Thursday.


*I remembered to wear sensible shoes.


*I did not remember to wear warm, handknit socks or a suitable jacket.


*Now I haz the snifflz.


*Grades close this week.  This came as "news" to several students and now we are scrambling to finish all the stuff they told us they'd finished or didn't tell us they were supposed to finish.


*The Cheerful Teaching Assistant had to go to a training today, but she came back for the last period of the day.


*The Organized Teaching Assistant and I were very tired by then because it is difficult to explain to students how all those zeros have to be averaged into their grades.


*You can get lots of very good grades, but still fail if you don't watch the zeros.


*Kids don't get that sometimes...


*Nor do they understand the concept of "weighted" grades.  


*As in: This Grade Counts As Three Grades So You Should Really Do This Assignment And Not Refuse To Believe Us When We Tell You It is Important.


*Or blame us for NOT telling you this when we most certainly did waaaay back in September when the stupid thing was due in the first place.


*I'd also like to take a minute to explain how a million students handing in a billion late assignments all at the same time slows things down a bit.


*As in: Your Teacher Cannot Review Your Work And Enter All Those Grades Within Ten Seconds.  Going Online To Check Your Grade All Day Isn't Going To Make You Happy.  


*The end of the quarter is fun for everyone.  


*Especially if you happen to throw in an Evacuation Drill just for kicks.


*And on Wednesday.


*I had to chase the Very Complicated Kitty around for a while this morning because he is stealing cotton yarn.


*He's probably eating it.  He has "issues."  


*And is "complicated."


*Every day.  Not just Wednesday.


*But the weather is getting colder and he throws off wicked body heat so I forgive him a great deal.


*Heating some chicken and potatoes I "put up" last summer.  


*There's peas, too but they are the frozen kind because I don't like canned peas.  Not even the kind I make myself.


*A tasty dinner.  Makes all those hours spent sweating over a hot canning pot during the sweltering summer months worth it!


*Re-reading of old favorites continues.


*Just finished Odd Hours by Dean Koontz.  I love this series.


*I don't read the first one very often, though.  (Odd Thomas)


*It's fabulous, but it makes me very sad.


*Koontz is a great writer about 75% of the time.  If you are looking for a good example of brilliantly written dialogue, he's your man!


*And dogs.  He writes good stuff about dogs because he is the patron saint of golden retrievers.


*I don't have dogs.  But I like goldens.  They are nice dogs and sometimes will smile at you.


*I also doubt that they steal yarn and try to eat it, but I don't know that for a fact.  Maybe they do.


*Tomorrow is Thursday.  I'm almost positive of this.


*Then it will be Friday and, after that, Saturday.


*I'm getting my hair cut on Saturday.  Probably should make a note of that since I tend to forget stuff like days of the week and whatnot...


That's it for me, dear readers.  The timer on the oven has gone off and it sounds like chicken and potatoes are waiting for me!  Just the thing on a chilly night that turned out to be a Wednesday.  And I need to replenish some calories after all that evacuating.

On a Wednesday...

SA