Welcome to the stupidest Wednesday ever in the history of Midweeks. Ever. I still can't believe it myself and I was there, for crying out loud! Here's your bullet points for this particular Wednesday:
*There are a number of changes coming to my middle school classroom.
*Changes that will require a certain amount of work on my part.
*These changes were discussed at length.
*In multiple settings.
*By great masses of gathered educational professionals.
*Discussed in depth.
*Every possible eventuality was analyzed.
*Great thought went into these decisions.
*No one mentioned any of these changes to me.
*I have until Monday to figure out how to implement these well-executed changes.
*Some people didn't mention the changes because they are scared of me.
*Others didn't mention them because they have not yet learned to be scared of me.
*Many were just caught up in the excitement of all the change-making.
*And one, my boss, had the foresight to give me a Very Special Commendation when she spoke in front of the school board last week.
*Because I am so very flexible in the face of sweeping changes. Particularly the ones I don't know about yet.
*A real team player, that Ms. Sheep!
*That was brilliant. Genius, even.
*THERE IS NO WAY I CAN PROTEST THESE CHANGES OR POINT OUT THE OBVIOUS FLAWS WITHOUT LOOKING LESS THAN FLEXIBLE OR WORTHY OF COMMENDATION!!!
*I am currently wrapped up in my Blumfy and will be there for the foreseeable future.
*Don't come over. I won't answer the door.
*Tangled up in my Blumfy.
*In case you missed the last post, Blumfy=Snuggie.
*Blanket with sleeves.
*Tacky item "as seen on TV."
*And very awesome, especially when you have been given a commendation which prevents your responding to things that most definitely require a strongly worded response.
*For those who asked, the Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty does love the Blumfy.
*It goes like this:
*Sheepie wraps up in Blumfy and lays sideways on the couch.
*Big, Fluffy Kitty snuggles into the nook created by mommy's tummy.
*Giant, orange beast gallops over, grabs the little bit of Blumfy hanging off the couch and yanks.
*Rolls himself right up in it.
*Sheepie and the BFK hang on for dear life and cling to what little Blumfy is left to them.
*Can't knit in a Blumfy.
*Don't care what the commercials say.
*Can't knit in a Blumfy when an AGK is dragging you to the ground with all his considerable might.
*It's physically and emotionally exhausting to even try knitting in a Blumfy.
*Now he has all the blankies in the house and there is nothing I can do about it, really.
*Still nice to be wrapped up in a Blumfy when it's raining and Wednesday has turned stupid beyond all reason.
*On the up side, I have job security now.
*Everyone who suddenly realized that they forgot to tell me about the changes is being very nice to me.
*As I said to my Organized Teaching Assistant today:
*"See that spot on the floor? I could poop right there and still not be fired. They'd even clean it up for me."
*I might have worded it a little differently, but it was something along those lines.
*I'm not pooping on the floor. I was just illustrating my point, is all.
I think we've reached a good stopping point. Once you've had to reassure people that you aren't planning on besmirching the tiles of a middle school classroom, you probably should shut things down for the night. Maybe go see if the AGK is willing to share a corner of the Blumfy. I am so very, very glad this day is over. Thursday and Friday are right around the corner.
Of course that means that Monday (aka The Day Of Great And Sweeping Change) is looming ever closer and I still don't quite know what to do with it, but I don't want to think about that right now...
Dateline – Toronto
15 hours ago